camry-2008:

one of my friends narrated this to me and asked what he shld do, pls advice

i have been living with my wife for the past one year(she is not working for now) and we belived that we loved and trusted each other, when ever i come back 4rm office she must go through my fone and like wise me, i will see all her received and dialled numbes, sent and received SMS for the day and this have been going on for a long time, just last week, her mother came to spend the weekend with us. on sunday, she went to see sombody off wth my wife,the buzz of the fone she left on top of TV alerted me so i reluctantly pick the fone(her mums fone) and scrolled tru the SMS, i found out that my wife has been sending recharge card almost every two- two days to her,she always complain that pocket money given to her is alwys enough, yet she will delete it frm her sent items cos i must go tru her fone,
*how will i ask her about this issue cos she ll ask what took me to her mothers fone
* what shld i do

olanajim:

mr poster, I think it is wrong for you and your wife to be doing that in the first place. The pain it will bring is better imagined. You must stop checking your wife phones. If you trust her stop it. If you must check her phone, do it periodically maybe not unless you suspect anything.

The second issue that is glaring in you post is that if all the time you have been checking her phone, you didnt notice she was sending rc to her mum, then it show that your wife is smarter than you. It show that she delete the numbers/sms she dont want you to see. So of what use is checking her phone to you? She may be a faithful lady who merely want to be sure that you dont flirt around.

Finally, if your wife send rc to her mum, that shouldnt cause you heartbreak. You should rather praise her. Parents should be taken care of. Since she has not get a job, she can only send money or rc to her mum through the pocket money you gave her. After all, she was not stealing your money, and your money is not missing. In all honesty, you should be doing what she did.

However, if you are tired of giving her pocket money, find job for her to do. Dont make a issue of the rc she sent to her mum. It will weaken her trust in you. Handle it maturely or forget it entirely.

posakosa:

Truthfully, people like you should NOT be married. You might die of a heart attack.

when ever i come back 4rm office she must go through my fone and like wise me, i will see all her received and dialled numbes, sent and received SMS for the day and this have been going on for a long time,