As they say, your University years are the best years of your life... This is because of a ton of things, including the fact that these are the years you fully take advantage of your Youthful Exuberance license.

But the best part of the University, are the different characters you interact with on a daily basis and those you happen to make friends with.

So, i'm going to receive the anointing today and profile the types of friends one makes in school

1) The Friend Of Convenience

These people are only your friends whenever it's convenient for them. They never invest into the friendship, you don't even get to meet their more prominent group of friends because they don't think you're up to the 'standard'...you're the friend they meet when they want to fill someone with tales of their awesome life because they want you to aspire to be like them. They enjoy the feeling of being fawned over, and they think your life is nowhere as awesome as theirs.
More often than not, the stories are filled with lies and exaggerations

Your reaction to such friends and their tales usually go:

2. The Foodie Friends

These friends don't know the road to your room/house, neither do they have your contacts unless they're hungry or they see you returning from the market. Their greetings usually go, "Guy, how far? Chow dey?" Or "Babe, you cook today? Hope say my mouth dey". They are usually responsible for your provisions finishing before mid-semester

Your reaction whenever these guys knock at your door and you're eating

3. The Handout/Material Friend

These ones only know you when they want to borrow handouts/material from you. They become regular visitors whenever exam period approaches. They will borrow every piece of paper they see you with, but once exams are over, dem no sabi you again.

But once exams approach, they're back like

That's why i choose my friends op.

4 The Aluta Friends

Some people come to the University to further their education, others come to further their political aspirations. These friends contest for whatever positions they can vie for from 100level and are involved in every association. They go from contesting for Parliament or PLO in 100level, once they leave that post, they hustle for a post in their Church fellowship, next up, state association, then, departmental office and if they have time left, SUG.

Some of them always act like they don't really want the job and claim people are begging them...and i'm like

safarigirl:

2. The Foodie Friends

These friends don't know the road to your room/house, neither do they have your contacts unless they're hungry or they see you returning from the market. Their greetings usually go, "Guy, how far? Chow dey?" Or "Babe, you cook today? Hope say my mouth dey". They are usually responsible for your provisions finishing before mid-semester

Your reaction whenever these guys knock at your door and you're eating

Na this one dey pain pass. They will eat you oooo until you start hiding yourself when cooking and when returning from market . Most times you will be wondering if their parents don't give them feeding money . Guys no too dey do am shaa na all these gurls forming ajebota that fix nails that is longer than handouts...

safarigirl:
3. The Handout/Material Friend
These ones only know you when they want to borrow handouts/material from you. They become regular visitors whenever exam period approaches. They will borrow every piece of paper they see you with, but once exams are over, dem no sabi you again.
But once exams approach, they're back like

These ones... even after the borrowing ask if if they have started reading yet they will be like "my sister for where, I no even no where to start reading from" ... and then you will be like why all the borrowing then...

5. The Upcoming Musician Friends

These ones have been into music since Secondary school, they're just looking for how they'll blow. They are usually rappers, they perform at every social function they can sneak their way into in schools and usually have a bunch of hypemen who jump on stage when they perform
They usually don't graduate on time or are withdrawn and then they're like

The ones dat run to ur Room to charge their phone immediately u put on Gen.. Usually annoying esp wen a bae u v been timing finally agrees to come nd u will b receiving unnecessary knocks on d door

Hopefully, I can relate to this post next year. what makes the difference between friends we make st home and in school? They are all naughty, callous, and dramatic....

They are all after the feminine specie. Nothing new.

.

6. The Picture Freak Friends

These ones have the life goal to take enough pictures to defy logic. They snap at least 7 pictures everyday and you have the honorable job of being their photographer.
They take selfies in class, they want to take a picture next to every nice car, beautiful flowers and fancy buildings....they even photobomb other people's photos
Worse still, if your phone has a good camera quality, just know you will be the co-owner of the phone. These friends are usually active on Instagram and Snapchat

Space for sale...
Cheap lands, #200 only....

why do I feel like I can build a house with 250 naira.

You are so on point. this make sense

7. The Fanatic Friend

Have you praised the Lord today? These ones are most popular in religious associations where they have held every post possible
They are a living, breathing version of your conscience, always harping the importance of Christ/Allah in your life. They drag you to the church/mosque, invite you for every event holding in God's house and use emotional blackmail if they have to.
Whenever they start, you're like

8. The Phone Charger Friends

Their phone batteries are never full, everytime you meet them, the first thing they ask you once they've greeted you is, "Guy, how far? You hold your charger for here?"
In class, they have a permanent seat next to the working socket, they visit you at odd hours of the day and night to charge your phone. Even when they charge overnight (assuming they can finally afford a charger), the battery still dies before midday.
Whenever you go out with them, they're always lookibg for a socket to plug their phones

That's all i've got folks
Feel free to add any more i may have excluded.
Lemme invite honourables tosyne2much, wristbangle and photoshoot to the party

Nice one dear

I wish I could add to the list but can't because I didn't school in the university, I actually school in the polytechnic so I have no idea of the kinds of friends they meet there...

Lemme just observe what guys have to say

The borrow borrow friends.

They borrow virtually everytin. They remember u wen dey are only in need of sometin. Na so one of my friend con borrow my bathing soap dat year

Spot on

safarigirl:
7. The Fanatic Friend

Have you praised the Lord today? These ones are most popular in religious associations where they have held every post possible
They are a living, breathing version of your conscience, always harping the importance of Christ/Allah in your life. They drag you to the church/mosque, invite you for every event holding in God's house and use emotional blackmail if they have to.
Whenever they start, you're like

this ones ehn,they will wake us up every 5a.m 4 general a.m devotions and my people na them Bleep pass,Bleep anything fuckable,especially the girls,let me keep quiet..and we call this other girls "ijabian sisters" hmmm leapz sealed again

The academics-only friends: they talk to you only when they need assistance on a concept or topic they don't understand. After that you don't get close to even their friendzone.

The social media friends: they don't talk to you in class or anywhere around the school but they become friendly to you on WhatsApp. Weird.

The ambitious ones: these ones have only one requirement for friendship (actually there may be more than one) --- be ready to listen to them talk about their ambitions as often as you meet. They can cheer you up and encourage you to keep going on even when you feel empty.

The selfish ones: the ones that want to have as much intellectual advantage as possible over every other person. They seldom share knowledge and feel threatened whenever other seem to be catching up with them.

The Soccer guru kind of friends

lol....thats friendship for you,even with their behavior u just have to manage them

safarigirl:
3. The Handout/Material Friend
These ones only know you when they want to borrow handouts/material from you. They become regular visitors whenever exam period approaches. They will borrow every piece of paper they see you with, but once exams are over, dem no sabi you again.
But once exams approach, they're back like

With passion, I dislike the ones that fall in dis category. sadly I have got a lot of them as "friends'.

Lolzzz... Quite hilarious!






Lalasticlala, good morning!

safarigirl:
5. The Upcoming Musician Friends

These ones have been into music since Secondary school, they're just looking for how they'll blow. They are usually rappers, they perform at every social function they can sneak their way into in schools and usually have a bunch of hypemen who jump on stage when they perform
They usually don't graduate on time or are withdrawn and then they're like

naso I d read my books jejely nahim this kind guy come rap for my back I think say 2pac Don even resurrect

ok

ok

not everyone is a writer. very boring read I must say. very boring

You forgot the fvck buddies, the chain smokers ET all