*MATHEMATICS EXAM PAPER*
*Time*: *3Hrs 30MINS*
*INSTRUCTIONS:* *ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS.*
*ALL QUESTIONS CARRY EQUAL MARKS*

*1.* You have dated a girl for *two* years, eventually she drops you for another guy. Calculate the percentage of time wasted. *(20 marks)*

*2.* You bought a phone for your girlfriend and she gave it to another guy. Using trigonometric identities, derive a general formula for this type of love. *(20 marks)*

*3. For Boys* You're dating around 15 girls and every girl is demanding for a Samsung Galaxy and an iPhone 6s
*(a)* Plot a graph of girls against prices of phones. *(15marks)*
*(b)* Use your graph to estimate your future poverty *(5marks)*

*4.* You are dating other peoples' sisters yet you don't want to see any guy with your sister. Calculate the Percentage Error in your Thinking Capacity. *(20 marks)*

*5.* You are a *civil servant*, your wife is a petty trader, your combined household income is less than K30,000. Your daughter who is awaiting *GCE* result is using iPhone 6s and Samsung Galaxy worth K150,000 each. Calculate the Percentage of your Parental Negligence. *(20 marks)*

*6. *For girls* You're a girl and you have dated 20 guys with hard labour, use the law of diminishing Return to calculate the substance that will be left for your husband to enjoy. *(20 marks)*

*7.* You can't give your wife N500 for a pot of soup, but you spend over N50000 in bars and restaurant.
Calculate the radius of your 'stupidity', take π=3.142 *(20 marks)*

_*BEST OF LUCK!*_

Note: Send your answer scripts to my inbox. 1st ten correct entries win free tickets to visit Shekau in the UK hospital!

Lol

Prof, your wife is with me, give me my full mark in the next ten minutes and I won't fvck her but if the ten minutes elapse. I'm afraid you may have to resort to going in through the back door that would likely be hanging on its hinges. Thanks.

UndisputedBosom:


Wicked

sir, I'm not. I only want to pass.