Advice Needed Urgently! - Family - Nairaland
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| Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 7:11pm On Oct 01, 2016 |
I stay at Benin, Edo state, with my aunt, a sick cousin and a house boy. The house boy, name David. I must admit he lacks certain manners and I dont blame him as such, as I know he grew up all along in the village, so you could imagine how sussy he might be atimes. I'm easy going. I'm a Christian. I take Dave as my brother. We talk, laugh, and of course 'hail' each other. Despite his flaws in behaviour, I see an obedient fellow, who just want everything calm and straight forward. He doesnt hide his feelings. He speaks without reserve. Now, here is the big one, my aunt. Oh, I once packed my things and set to leave few days after I arrived her place, but I was touched when I saw her weeping like a child, asking me 'who is going to help her at that time look after my sick cousin?', then she had not hired Dave,. So I changed my mind and stayed behind. Later on I left her and went to school, and this holiday when I visited I saw she had hired Dave. Well my aunt is very hot, very hot angered I mean. Oh, you'ld hate yourself when she explodes on you. She can say things that rips one's heart, she is very good at stirring up hot anger in even a very quiet person like me, that made me at that time almost left her. On the other hand, she is good, loving, kind hearted and she's a good giver. You can eat till you die at her home. Now, here's the biggest one, my aunt always gets into word tussle with Dave. She shouts, yells and barks, accuses most times unjustly, blames him almost on every thing that goes wrong in the house, and hmm..you should never pray to be under the weep of her tongue when she starts her blame or accusing game..that was what provoked me at first to leave. Dave being who he is, with his sharp tongues atimes replies or ignores her rather uncouthly and that aggravates the whole thing. Most times I just stand and watch as both get locked on in an arguement, I dnt know what to say or do. Sometimes I dont side her, and I dont still Dave esp where the issue at hand is no one's fault. What do I do? How can I curb this constantly reoccurring problem? Cos I really feel for Dave, sometimes he justs sits and cries after the usual catastrophe,.. I really want to do something but I dont just know what to do and my Phlegmatic 'introvercy' is not helping matters. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 7:13pm On Oct 01, 2016 |
RoyalRoy, Seun, Lalasticlala I need serious advice pls. Help move this to frontpage. Thanks. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by SUPERPACK: 8:04pm On Oct 01, 2016 |
summary please. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by sisisioge: 8:36pm On Oct 01, 2016 |
 Good! I see you are trying your hands at narrative writing...goody goody. Here's what I think you should do...marry your words suitably by creating good concord. About the issue: hmmmm...I no no o . Make your aunty take am eeasy, although it can't be easy being her right now. She must be strained physically, emotionally and financially. Taking care of sick loved ones is never easy mehn. Dave on the other hand should mind himself. He should not ever talk back at his boss...bad behavior! You on the other hand... I seriously don't know why you brought this here. Anyways, continue to practice putting words down  |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by babyfaceafrica: 10:53pm On Oct 01, 2016 |
lmao |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Richy4(m): 4:07pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
She was letting off steam bro...You have a cousin whom I suppose was her son or daughter that was sick... she was kind of frustrated like life was not fair on her.. so when she wants to react, she took it overboard.... Talk to Dave, to let it go at time. explain how you think your Aunt was feeling because of the frustration.... Also talk separately to your Aunt to let it go at times that all will be well...That she should overlook things at times so that she will not have HBP.. that you guys love her alot and will like her to stay for a long time.. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 8:19pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Thanks Richy4, I have been thinking on dat line of sitting down to talk to my aunt, i jst dont know how she wud take it, I dont want her to flare up...cos as at yesterday it got worse and there was almost a fight, see me acting linesman btwn my aunt and Dave..lol..anyways, he left the house out of anger and slept outside and returnd dis morning..and I've been trying to talk to him.. And for u sisisioge dat thought I was trying to learn or practice writing or whtever u call it..nxt time dnt judge a book by its cover, I'm a writer, if there were mistake or grammatical errors, itwas because of my unstability wen I was typing..u can read my blog were I write all my articles http://sundryvirtues..com , I have a book am currently writing, so next time learn to take issues seriously. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by sisisioge: 8:22pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Mescopaul: OK...no vex. I leave the rest for your editor...she has her hands full |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 8:25pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
sisisioge:This guy ur matter big oo..shey dem don use editor for nairaland posts ni..go tell ahnie dat one |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by sisisioge: 8:29pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Mescopaul: Babe...no vex. I just dey hail ni while sympathizing with u on your Aunty's issue. Biko no vex. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 8:36pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
sisisioge:  |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by sisisioge: 8:39pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Mescopaul: oya seriously no vex. I be girl, couldn't help the temptation to do my own back when u referred to me as a guy. Alright, bearing olive branch now...I wish u good luck with the issue. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Swissheart(f): 8:41pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
It is true your aunty is frustrated, hurt and unhappy especially over her sick child ,that is not a reason for her to make life unbearable for that boy who left his parents to work for her. If she continues that way,that boy'll leave and never return. You have to get her seated and talk to her. Be emotional as you can ,twill make her know you share in her pains but be firm and stern in your words. Let her know you are serious. If she continues shouting,her own health is at risk. Tell her to always overlook his naughtiness for the sake of the sick child and her wellbeing. Dave,you have to firstly make him understand his boss isn't happy about the happenings in her life,hence her outpour at times. Tell him to see her as his aunt and shouldn't take all her words to heart as she doesn't mean them. 1 Like |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 8:45pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
sisisioge:  ..lol |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 8:50pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Swissheart: Many thanks..I was still thinking of telling her friend to talk to her, they're very close and almost like sisters, and her friend is a very understanding woman..what do u think? Will it seem as if it wud make my aunt angry dat I was kind of 'reporting' her? |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Swissheart(f): 8:51pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Mescopaul:Don't. Talk to her yourself but pls not like you are accusing her. |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 8:57pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Swissheart: Ok..many thanks dear |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Richy4(m): 9:32pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Mescopaul: If you are a writer, then you should have ways with words... Talk to her. she will not flare up....A lot of highly inflammable ladies and gentlemen still got a soft side... The best time to talk will be the night/ day u were packing your bag to leave...... the best day to talk to Dave will be today or when he is calm... |
| Re: Advice Needed Urgently! by Mescopaul(m): 11:57pm On Oct 02, 2016 |
Richy4:Hmm..you are right bro..I would do just that ... |
but pls not like you are accusing her.(1) (Reply)
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