14 Types of Chatters on Facebook and Whatsapp
1. Frequent Chatters
These are the group of people you can’t go a day without chatting with them. They are so close that you will always want keep in touch and chat them up. Family members, Boos and Baes, Romeo and Juliet, Love and Tomato Jos. I can’t go a day without chatting with my Onyinye.
2. Occasional Chatters
People in this category chat people up occasionally as the name implies. Some chat odd times, maybe when you cant repy the chats. Some of these chats may span up to one whole week. For Instance;
Me: Hello Grace, How you doing? Mon, 4-12-2016
Grace: Im fine, u? Thursday, 7-12-2016
Me: Im good, why you always replying late? Thurday,7-12-2016
Grace: Sorry, don’t mind me. Hope you fine? Sunday, 11-12-2016
Me:?
3. NEPA Chatters
This name was given as a result of the epileptic nature of NEPA in this naija wia we dey, if you know what I mean. These guys/babes just flash like the NEPA factor and zoom off. For instance they say Hi to you this minute, they are offline next minute. These sets of people are usually the ones that starts the convo but just goes off like NEPA without prior notice. Some even manage to tell you “BRB”..do yourself good not to wait because “BRB” means till next week in other persons dictionary.
4. Blackmail Chatters
Blackmail chatters begin the convo like:
Grace: Hello Mike, na wa you ooo..You just dey forget pelson. No wahala, as you don dey see money now, you no believe say person dey again. Know say God dey oo.
Me: Hello Grace, no be like that..no mind me
5. Business Chatters
These sets of chatters are the most active. They keep chatting and disturbing the day light out of your life just to convince you about a new business you need to join. They keep preaching these business to you till you may even give in to join. These guys can disturb for Africa. They are very nice people too if I may add, calling you sir upandan. Who sir self don epp?
6. Anonymous Chatters
Just like the name, you may be chatting with this person for even weeks without knowing who this person is because of using different display picture. Very common on Whatsapp but less on FB. Some will not just introduce themselves before commencing chats believing you will know them or even have their number. You in your own end will not want to ask who you are chatting with just in case its someone you should or are suppose to definitely have His/her number.So, the blind chats continues.. Him: How far naaaa Me: Fine oooo, E don tey ooo (Mean while, I no even know who be dat sef,. Wetin consign me)
7. Hooker Chatters
Hookers just pick numbers and begin to pull chats through to them expecting the could hook a fish. You hear stories like,
Hookers: Do you know Bimbo that’s not too short or too tall will chocolate maroon skin tone?? She gave me your number, she said she creating a circle of friends and want all her friends to know each other. So, can I know you better?
Me: I’m like, shey Bimbo did not tell you about me ni??
8. Update Chatters
These ones just come up anytime they like and be updating status anyhow. When they are done, they go off line. So, they circle continues. In the same category of this update chatter, we have people who only chat with you when even you have a new status update. After that day, forget it till you have a new status update. They only react to your updates
9. Stalker Chatters
These people stalk you like kilode? Bia, are you a monitoring spirit?? They keep checking everything about you online as if they want to give you a new job. After then na to broadcast am.
10. Poker Chatters
The pokers are the people who do not, in fact make the mistake of chatting with if you do not initiate a chat. You guys can be online for hours and nobody talks except someone pokes. If you initiate the chat, you guys will begin to chat as if you have been chatting since morning. Infact, they person might not even give you space to chat..na only her own chat go full everywhere. I be like, shebi you get talk like this nain you just cupple yourself keep dia..I will just go offline
11. Parasitic Chatters
The parasitic chatters can beg online ooo..they will just be begging for everything. Send me this or that upandan as if them put dia.
12. Group Chatters
These ones are the ones that will be active in a group chat but don’t talk when it’s a personal private message. They keep making noise in a group but lack words when it comes to a group.
13. “Were” Chatters
This one as the name implies are the “were”chatters I mean “mad”. They say all sorts of rubbish, crack all sort of dry jokes with you. They are the real “were”
Add yours, just for fun