bukatyne:


Special antenatal/post natal care for the wives? Special rites men were not involved in? Tying of stomachs, special pepper soups etc.

yes to this

Was there any traditional 'kegel'? Focus on restoring her body to pre-pregnancy size?

Lol. I don't know. Maybe olanna knows

Olanna45:
The husband's properties are hers as well. She the next in command if the husband is no more.

The man is allowed to marry and divorce as many times as he wants. but the woman is not permitted to do so.

Yes, the women might be married and the husband is no more, and she doesn't have a child for the husband. she adopts that method so that the husband's lineage will not go into extinction.

In some cases( let me illustrate this with a story) it invovles one of my secondary school class mate...

A man got married and had 5 daughters.. Due to the love his wife or maybe finance, he did not marry a second wife. He passed away after some years. The five daughter are all married and their mum very old.

Now, they both had a meeting and decided that instead of allowing their father's name to phase out,they agreed to go and get a wife in his name. Now they met this family whose daughter got pregnant out of wedlock. They dicussed with the family their plans and both the daughter and parents agreed to it. Marital rites was performed. traditional wedding took place, the lady gave the wine to the first daughter of the dead man( she stood in place of her father) After some months, the lady put to bed a baby boy.... And automatically the boy becomes the dead man's son. ( that is my classmate)
Th lady later have a boyfriend( maybe not just one sha) but she had other children apart from this my classmate. She had 6 kids all together. 4 boys and two girls. These children are considered as the deadman's children. who ever donated the sperm for their conception has no right over them. He is just a sperm donor.

aaaawwww isn't that wonderful?

cococandy:


That's a good question.

Na real 'That's a good question'

Most of the stuff I read on foreign women were from their histographers and studying their art.

Considering we were not 'literate' till after colonization, how did we communicate /preserve our history before?

cococandy:
yes to this


Lol. I don't know. Maybe olanna knows

Just yes? no further gist?

Oya Olanna45 : I even invited megareal here to talk on that part.

@ baby124, please see a modified post

bukatyne:


What about divorce, polygamy, inheritance? How was the home run? Chores? What did the women do for recreation? Pre-martial se.,X, how did a woman find a husband? Finance? Ante and post natal care, What is the usual age gap BTW couples? How was issue resolved between the couple etc.

I am not talking on individual level, I am talking cultural.

Interesting

bukatyne:


Na real 'That's a good question'

Most of the stuff I read on foreign women were from their histographers and studying their art.

Considering we were not 'literate' till after colonization, how did we communicate /preserve our history before?

I know we preserved our history from story telling. Although such information is subject to misinterpretation and spicing up as it goes from hand to hand which makes it a little bit unreliable.

However I'm sure if one searches deep enough, there will be written history not colored by western lenses. Where to find them, I don't know.

1bkaye:
Interesting

Ibunkunola, Oya tell us something about ancient Yoruba women

bukatyne:


Just yes? no further gist?

Oya Olanna45 : I even invited megareal here to talk on that part.

Peppersoup.
Tying of wraps around the belly.
Massages.
Bed rest.

cococandy:

I know we preserved our history from story telling. Although such information is subject to misinterpretation and spicing up as it goes from hand to hand which makes it a little bit unreliable.

However I'm sure if one searches deep enough, there will be written history not colored by western lenses. Where to find them, I don't know.

True.

Will search when I'm up to it.

Mindfulness:


I already have.

no you haven't. your comment was meant to be an insult and don't know what compelled you to try insult me by typing "your mama too" when the context of the discussion is ancient women.. that quote is my own summation of the plight and status of the ancient women putting into consideration different societies and cultures.

so no need to get defensive or rude dye to your lack of compression and misinterpretation.

bukatyne:


Special antenatal/post natal care for the wives? Special rites men were not involved in? Tying of stomachs, special pepper soups etc.

Was there any traditional 'kegel'? Focus on restoring her body to pre-pregnancy size?

Special pepper soup yes, Yam some local spices like uda and uziza, herbs and yam is prepared for the woman. they said it helps to wash away bad blood.

Then in my locality, i don't know about others, the man is expected to slaughter a fat fowl for the woman, this will be used in preparing the yam pepper soup for her.

Then, ( My aunties and some other women i know did this) she is expected to sit on a low stool for at least a week after birth... They said it helps in closing up the vagina.... I don't know true this is....

Olanna45:
Special pepper soup yes, Yam some local spices like uda and uziza, herbs and yam is prepared for the woman. they said it helps to wash away bad blood.

Then in my locality, i don't know about others, the man is expected to slaughter a fat fowl for the woman, this will be used in preparing the yam pepper soup for her.

Then, ( My aunties and some other women i know did this) she is expected to sit on a low stool for at least after birth... They said it helps in closing up the vagina.... I don't know true this is....

Hmmmm...

IS the peppersoup effective? Did you know anyone who didn't do it and turned out well?
Doesn't this pepper soup thingy fatten someone?

bukatyne:


Hmmmm...

IS the peppersoup effective? Did you know anyone who didn't do it and turned out well?
Doesn't this pepper soup thingy fatten someone?

Fatten: Not sure

Effective: not sure(maybe when i have mine, i will try it out)

bukatyne:


Ibunkunola, Oya tell us something about ancient Yoruba women

My dear, it's not something I'm at all versed on so I am also eager to learn and will be following this thread closely

In Ibibio culture, from what I can gather, women were not second class citizens but they weren't too influential though except in family settings.

Marriage was mostly prearranged. And most married wives had s3x for the first time on their wedding night.

Premarital sex was frowned upon and a child out of wedlock was a shame to the family. If a man happened to get any girl pregnant before marriage, he was quickly forced to marry her by both families to avert shame as shaming was not limited to the girl's family alone.

I also heard their dressing was special. Maidens went topless with a little bead or wrapper covering their privates while the married ones covered up and down. (And there was nothing like rape o)

A woman at childbirth (esp the first baby) was tended to like a queen. After delivery, she will not be made to do anything. She was waited on hands and feet, bathed and ministered to by a special midwife whose duty it was to get her female parts back to her pre pregnancy state, restore her complexion and mould her through massage to be appealing once more to her husband.

Someone else will bathe and massage her baby, and she will only touch the child during breastfeeding. It was believed she had come back from a tedious journey and needed to rest (No be today where we come back from hospital and start scrubbing the floor )

And after omugwo, the mum or MI will find her a hsehelp to help around the house. Some used to have up to four and sometimes the husband will later marry the househelp sef.

Pls note that some of this practices also varied. Like circumcision and the use of fattening rooms.

bukatyne:


There were a lot of differences across tribes.

In Sparta for instance, the women did physical sport to have strong babies & they were in control of the home cos their men were more preoccupied with defending the state. In general, they had better lives than a Athenian or Greek wife for instance.

Sparta society is based on military strength. so the duty of women is to give birth to strong babies that will later become soldiers. not to forget the child will be sent to military camp at an early age leaving their mother's alone.. in short Sparta women suffered loneliness, many became widows and were forced to marry again.. many young ladies were also used as sex slaves for soldiers refreshments. also they actively engage in agriculture so I don't know how they are different in general terms.

Athens women suffered similar fate..

in southern Africa especially the San women were tribal chiefs ,they control their household and land area. so I can say they enjoyed slightly than their European counterpart.

@Niyyah:

Are you Hausa?

Saw some of your posts on the culture section.

@ bukatyne with your obsession about chores I wanna say its mostly the same standard everywhere in ancient world. one if their main function is to keep the house in oder.
they are the household general.

megareal:
In Ibibio culture, from what I can gather, women were not second class citizens but they weren't too influential though except in family settings.

Marriage was mostly prearranged. And most married wives had s3x for the first time on their wedding night.

Premarital sex was frowned upon and a child out of wedlock was a shame to the family. If a man happened to get any girl pregnant before marriage, he was quickly forced to marry her by both families to avert shame as shaming was not limited to the girl's family alone.

I also heard their dressing was special. Maidens went topless with a little bead or wrapper covering their privates while the married ones covered up and down. (And there was nothing like rape o)

A woman at childbirth (esp the first baby) was tended to like a queen. After delivery, she will not be made to do anything. She was waited on hands and feet, bathed and ministered to by a special midwife whose duty it was to get her female parts back to her pre pregnancy state, restore her complexion and mould her through massage to be appealing once more to her husband.

Someone else will bathe and massage her baby, and she will only touch the child during breastfeeding. It was believed she had come back from a tedious journey and needed to rest (No be today where we come back from hospital and start scrubbing the floor )

And after omugwo, the mum or MI will find her a hsehelp to help around the house. Some used to have up to four and sometimes the husband will later marry the househelp sef.

Pls note that some of this practices also varied. Like circumcision and the use of fattening rooms.

Very interesting

Thanks for honoring my mention

I am gathering wives did not work much outside the house yet they had a lot of helps. The husbands were also polygamous.

Did they place premium on male kids?

Since premium was placed on virginity, when did Ibibios start getting the rap as badt girls in bed (outside marriage?)

I am also believing s.e,X was an integral part of the marriage & the women were taught to make love/respond to their husbands?

oloyede252:
@ bukatyne with your obsession about chores I wanna say its mostly the same standard everywhere in ancient world. one if their main function is to keep the house in oder.
they are the household general.

You went through this beautiful thread and all you can see is obsession with chores?

Besides, running the home is different from doing the work yourself.

Please don't ruin this thread.

Olanna45:
Fatten: Not sure

Effective: not sure(maybe when i have mine, i will try it out)

Ok

1bkaye:

My dear, it's not something I'm at all versed on so I am also eager to learn and will be following this thread closely

Hope you enjoy the thread.

bukatyne:
@Niyyah:

Are you Hausa?

Saw some of your posts on the culture section.

No am Yoruba

Niyyah:


No am Yoruba

Muslim? Help me fetch one sweet Hausa lady.

Sorry for the mix up.

Happy new year.

bukatyne:


You went through this beautiful thread and all you can see is obsession with chores?

Besides, running the home is different from doing the work yourself.

Please don't ruin this thread.

The thread has been ruined from the beginning. Everyone seems to be typing what they think and not what they really know with 100% certainty.

No sources, no links, no references, no nothing.

crackhaus:

The thread has been ruined from the beginning. Everyone seems to be typing what they think and not what they really know with 100% certainty.

No sources, no links, no references, no nothing.

Well I don't really think we have much sources to go by.

Igbo ladies are repping and between Olanna45 & Cococandy, we have an idea of ancient Igbo women.

I need other tribes oooo....

Happy new year.

@craziebone has deactivated. Woaw!

Back to women in ancient Nigeria

crackhaus:

The thread has been ruined from the beginning. Everyone seems to be typing what they think and not what they really know with 100% certainty.

No sources, no links, no references, no nothing.

Chinua achebe's things fall apart can give an insight to what pre colonial igbo setting looks like.

Then before westernization, there was no form of documentation, and Nigerians are not much of history researchers...We get to know some these practices from Stories pass down from generation to generation

bukatyne:


Muslim? Help me fetch one sweet Hausa lady.

Sorry for the mix up.

Happy new year.

Yes pls, no problem

cc Deezou.

Niyyah:


Yes pls, no problem

cc Deezou.

Thanks dear

bukatyne:
@ baby124, please see a modified post

bukatyne:


What about divorce, polygamy, inheritance?

It was not unusual for a Yoruba woman to leave her husband's home if she is being maltreated. Marrying a divorcee in Yorubaland was never unusual. Polygamy was a thing of choice. Same as monogamy! It wasn't also unusual to see couples who had separated and even remarried come back together in old age! Yoruba women inherit property from parents and husband. Though in the husband's house it's the children that really inherit. A Yoruba woman at marriage becomes a full member of her husband's family, and forego's her own traditions and customs for her husband's, except she is maltreated!




How was the home run? Chores? What did the women do for recreation?

The home was run in the traditional way but on a case by case basis. Woman does home chores and a hand work or sell in the market. While the man is a hunter, farmer or skilled crafts man. For recreation, they would have. Played games, party a lot which is what we are known for. And also of course probably premarital or extramarital sex.lol. Sex was not such a big deal. People focused more on character. I think the western culture criminalizes and makes sex such a big deal.



Pre-martial se.,X, how did a woman find a husband? Finance?

I don't think virginity was a premium in ancient Yoruba culture. Though immorality was not condoned. Pregnancy before marriage was not rare. In fact pregnancy automatically made you a wife. This was done to protect the children and such children as seen as fully legitimate children of the man. A child is more than bride price and gifts. Children were and are still highly valued. Women were not bethroed or forced into marriage. Most of them dated and married men of their choice. Even if recommended by family.


Ante and post natal care, What is the usual age gap BTW couples? How was issue resolved between the couple etc.

In the ancient days most people didn't know their age. And the way they married, it's possible a lot of people were marrying women older than them. Widows remarried and divorcees a lot. The men they married took in and were responsible for the kids they brought in. Believe it or not. So it was not unusual to see a woman with kids from different father's. It wouldn't have been even a thought as to age. Except of course if the age gap is so significant. I doubt that would have been an issue if the man was significantly older though.

Post natal and antenatal was done by traditional birthing women and also the alagbo's . The man's mother is also the one responsible for taking care of the pregnant wife. Not her mother. Also the man's parents name the babies!!! This is what I mean by the wife being a full member of the man's family! She is completely absorbed in

Issues were resolved amongst the couple and if need be, escalated to the parents of the man or further escalated to the elders of both couples. The man's mother held a very big role in Yoruba families. Very influential...

Also as it relates to education, most of the women were educated in that they learnt a skill even before marriage. Western education has made our people very lazy. In fact men's wives contributed from their work to the home. Except the man was rich enough to demand his wives not sell in the market or practice their skill. This is why when western education came to Nigeria, Yoruba's we're sending their girl children to school in very high numbers. It was not unusual for a girl child to be educated either in the western or traditional way which was skill acquisition.