Early Christmas Shopping/ The wrong Way

It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, "What are you charged with"?

"Doing my Christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

"That's no offense," said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping"?

"Before the store opened."

The Wrong Way

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!"

"Heck," said Herman. "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"