Condom says to Pad "When you work, I lose seven days of business."
Pad replies, "If you fail to work once, my business stops for Nine
months!"

A  camel and an elephant met, and the elephant asked: "Why do you have
your boobs on your back?"
The camel responded: "What a silly question from  someone who has a dickkk
on his face!"

A  black guy and a white girl met at a niteclub. She took him to her
apartment and said: "Tie  me to the bed and do what black men do
best!", 

So he ran off with the TV and DVD Player

Wife: "I wish I was a newspaper, so that you could hold me every
morning!"
Husband: " Me too, my dear, so that I can have a NEW ONE every
morning!"

A Chinese couple got married. When the baby was born, her eyes were big
and blue, hair was curly and blonde, skin was brown. Finally, name of
baby was SUM TING WONG ("some thing wrong"

A lady visited her doctor one morning. Doc said: "You look so weak and
Exhausted!
Are you eating your meals 3 times a day as I advised?
Lady: "Doc, I thought you said 3 males a day!"

Phone rings and maid picks up the phone as her master  is bathing, 
When the caller asked "what's he doing?" the maid Replied:
masterbatte."(Master  bathing) 

Guy! you crack my ribs, nice.

;d ;d ;d

laffingssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

LWKMD

LMAAAAAAAO

Nice one!

nice one[color=][/color]

lol,
lol-ing,
lol-ment,
lol-mentation


me like, me like
more pls , more , !!!!

Cool

A 20c coin met a R20.00 note and said, "Hey Man, where have you been?
I haven't seen you around in a long time." The twenty rand answered, "Ey mate, I've been around. Went to the casino, did News café the one time, went on a cruise to Mozambique, just came back to South Africa for a while, I've been to a couple of rugby games, did Hillbrow last night, I think I'm doing the mall tomorrow, you know, that kind of stuff. How about you, what's been up man?" The 20c coin replied, "You know, same old stuff, church, church, church ,

the first one is funny.

I want more

Q: Why are condoms transparent?

A: So that sperms can at least enjoy the scene even if their entry is Restricted!

Signboard outside a prostitute's house:



Married MEN not allowed. We serve the needy, not the greedy,

Signboard outside a prostitutte's house:
Married MEN not allowed. We serve the needy, not the greedy,  

New AIDS awareness slogan:
Try different positions with the same woman instead of same position with different women.


Q: Why is $ex like shaving?
A: Well, because no matter how well you do it today,  tomorrow you'll have to do it again,  

Q: What will happen if earth rotates 30 times faster?
A: Men will get their salary everyday and women will bleed to death.

Q: Why do 90% gals have left boob bigger than right?
A: Bcoz 90% boys are right handed.

Q: What is the difference between a PANTY & a STAGE CURTAIN?
A: When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the PANTY,  It is SHOWTIME!

Q: What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?
A: Both are sweet in the beginning but become tasteless and shapeless later

Advantages of having an affair with married women.
·        They give like hell.
·        They do not yell.
·        They do not tell.
·        They do not swell and there is no wedding bell!

Did you know that if Adam and Eve were Chinese, we would be still in Paradise? Why? Because they would have eaten the snake instead of the bloody apple!

9ice one

Very Nicee

Thanks

Pharoh na schl cos am

A Burgler broke into a house one night.

He shined his flashlight around,

looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said,

'Jesus knows you're here.'

He nearly jumped out of his skin,

clicked his flashlight off, and froze.

When he heard nothing more ,

after a bit, he shook his head and continued.

Just as he pulled the stereo out so he

could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard

'Jesus is watching you.'

Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically,

looking for the source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room,

his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.

'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.

'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked,

'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.'

The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh?

Who in the world are you?'

'Moses,' replied the bird.

'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'

'The kind of people that would name their Rottweiler Jesus.'

After the 9th baby, Woman says to
priest "I don't know why I get pregnant so often, there must be something in
the air!!!!"

Priest- "Yes my child your
legs!