I am complaining again pop nairalanders. Well, ever since our baby was 5 months, he prefers to be with his father. This has caused me great pain and some jealousy and still causing more. I don't understand why he prefers to be with him.

Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that my husband has a great bond with our son, but it hurts me to see that my son ignores me while he is with his Dad.

I hope I am not the only one going through this.. Why so?

You should be very happy with this and not be jealous because only few men have time for their kids and when they do, the bond is usually higher.

airminem:
I am complaining again pop nairalanders. Well, ever since our baby was 5 months, he prefers to be with his father. This has caused me great pain and some jealousy and still causing more. I don't understand why he prefers to be with him. Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that my husband has a great bond with our son, but it hurts me to see that my son ignores me while he is with his Dad. I hope I am not the only one going through this.. Why so?

I understand your plight. When my son was about 8 months i felt the same, in fact my wife was giving me 30% attention the little boy get the rest. but now things have changed he can't wait to see me after school, i feed him, bath him and even rock him to bed (though most times i back him) I think it is just a matter of time, maybe you should create more time to bond with him while he plays with his daddy.

My daughter will not let my wife touch her whenever i'm around My wife is used to it now

Ur such a nag... No offense

dingbang:
Ur such a nag... No offense

if anyone knows what causes this please let me know.

I share your pain poster.
Ordinarily, kids bond well with thir mother, particularly male children, and girls to their father. My elder brother preferred our father while the rest of us boys to our mother before she died recently. Mhh... Tears.

I will tell you that you have no problem with this as it could be the manifestation of your child's genetical bond to his father. When you research on Charles Darwin's evolutionary psychology and Emile Zola's naturalism, you will understand why most of our conducts in life are shaped and reinforced by psychology or child parental genetics.

There could have been an episode that played like that in the past where a descendant preferred father over mother.

airminem:


if anyone knows what causes this please let me know.

he is d father for Christ sakes! Maybe u ain't good with kids... Remember ur mother in law spent more times with your baby.

Mankiso:
I share your pain poster.
Ordinarily, kids bond well with thir mother, particularly male children, and girls to their father. My elder brother preferred our father while the rest of us boys to our mother before she died recently. Mhh... Tears.

I will tell you that you have no problem with this as it could be the manifestation of your child's genetical bond to his father. When you research on Charles Darwin's evolutionary psychology and Emile Zola's naturalism, you will understand why most of our conducts in life are shaped and reinforced by psychology or child parental genetics.

There could have been an episode that played like that in the past where a descendant preferred father over mother.

My condolences. Thanks

dingbang:
he is d father for Christ sakes! Maybe u ain't good with kids... Remember ur mother in law spent more times with your baby.

I think as a mother we have a 'special' bond with our children thats more hormonal, a father cant understand that. It's certainly not their fault and it's not the child's fault for liking one parent better than the other in a moment of time.

Blood is thicker than water. No need for paternity test!

Exponental:
Blood is thicker than water. No need for paternity test!

Hmm

Mankiso:
I share your pain poster.
Ordinarily, kids bond well with thir mother, particularly male children, and girls to their father. My elder brother preferred our father while the rest of us boys to our mother before she died recently. Mhh... Tears.

I will tell you that you have no problem with this as it could be the manifestation of your child's genetical bond to his father. When you research on Charles Darwin's evolutionary psychology and Emile Zola's naturalism, you will understand why most of our conducts in life are shaped and reinforced by psychology or child parental genetics.

There could have been an episode that played like that in the past where a descendant preferred father over mother.

This is bull

Just last week, i came home from work (daddy and grandma stays with him all day) and he was napping, when he woke up, he saw me first and started crying. I picked him up and held him and he started screaming more... he turned, saw daddy and pushed me to get to him. As soon as daddy took him, he stopped crying. I just go straight inside bedroom dey cry.. cos I never feel that bad for long time.

SirWere:

This is bull

Meaning

dingbang:
Ur such a nag... No offense

; maybe she should be keeping her thoughts on diary section... as a journal

Eg

<<<On January 2017, My husband said the money he made was his...
<<<February 2017 Dear Diary, My mother inlaw said my baby was her bundle of joy which made me mad
<<<8 February 2017 my baby starts disliking me...and would not let me carry him and only prefers his father to do so which made me jealous..
<<<Dear diary March 2017 I killed my cat because it likes my baby better than me the owner...

Biko OP.... In as much as we love you, try a little maturity on your part when u are in this family section... If not, we will banish you to Romance section where you will meet your match...

You again?
Lols.

airminem:
Just last week, i came home from work (daddy and grandma stays with him all day) and he was napping, when he woke up, he saw me first and started crying. I picked him up and held him and he started screaming more... he turned, saw daddy and pushed me to get to him. As soon as daddy took him, he stopped crying. I just go straight inside bedroom dey cry.. cos I never feel that bad for long time.

Lol, don't take it personal. Kids get close to who they see all the time. It's because you don't spend enough time with him. As he grows older it will get better.

Sometimes I wonder if;

You are really a mother,
You are qualified to be called one
You understand marriage and parent hood
You got into marriage prepared.

Everytime complaints, if not your husband, it will be mother in-law, now it is your son, only God knows what it will be tomorrow

@OP; you again!
You don come?
Pls how old are you?
Are you sure 'they' are not 'doing' you?

Almost all the replies are funny...lmfao..hahahaha..........
Thank you all for making me laugh...
Airminem, nawaooo

Attention seeker

YOU AGAIN; what is wrong with you? You're now complaining about your husband and turned yourself into a contentious/nagging wife. For goodness sake, allow your husband bond with his son and stick your nose out of his business as he hasn't done anything to warrant looking for trouble. You should even be happy he is bonding with his son. Uche face your work and use your time and energy to do other productive things.

Everything is a freaking issue with you haba.
Your mother in law loves your baby :Problem

Your husband earns money: Problem

Now your son loves his own father: Problem.

I honestly pity your husband but again I don't he should have married a grown sane woman but no he had to marry a clingy " wife material " for cooking and cleaning purposes who believes every mother in law is Patience Ozowokor with a hidden motive. A man's money is their money while hers is to hide and siphon, a child must have " special hormonal bond" with the mother load of crap.

A child likes who they like abeg. A child freaking likes his father it is not a competition, unlearn all the crap you have filled your head with and start learning sense abeg

I got you first time, thanks.

montezz:
Attention seeker

Toss Off

You need to stop watching movies.

Eketem:
Everything is a freaking issue with you haba.
Your mother in law loves your baby :Problem

Your husband earns money: Problem

Now your son loves his own father: Problem.

I honestly pity your husband but again I don't he should have married a grown sane woman but no he had to marry a clingy " wife material " for cooking and cleaning purposes who believes every mother in law is Patience Ozowokor with a hidden motive. A man's money is their money while hers is to hide and siphon, a child must have " special hormonal bond" with the mother load of crap.

A child likes who they like abeg. A child freaking likes his father it is not a competition, unlearn all the crap you have filled your head with and start learning sense abeg

You just finish talk .... end of discussion!
I just pity the husband. If she gets jumpy about non issue like this, how much more real marital challenges. Well i hope she drops the possessive character and embrace life as it comes, or else she gets seriously hurt like command and control freaks always do.
@ Op, the problem lies within you .... work on your self.

fulaniHERDSman:

You just finish talk .... end of discussion!
I just pity the husband. If she gets jumpy about non issue like this, how much more real marital challenges. Well i hope she drops the possessive character and embrace life as it comes, or else she gets seriously hurt like command and control freaks always do.
@ Op, the problem lies within you .... work on your self.

You thought you have everything that will make you happy right?

airminem:


Hmm

lol, I understand u. this are possible reasons
1. kids listen to voices of their parents while in the tummy.
I might presume, u are not that mother that plays and sing to ur child in d tummy, and even while feeding and bathing him, do u sing and play with him? cos male children bond more with the mother.

2. it's not a competition who a child should love more, but I get it, it can be really annoying for d oda party but, don't take such anger on the child, u will end up resenting him n pushing him further to the father, so, even if he doesn't rap with u DAT much, still engage him ESP wen the father is not around. try to be so friendly with him, not to compete with the father, but because u love him too as a child.

3. bonding could be natural, children are fascinated by alot of things, ur hubby's face, smell, and even voice might be alluring to the baby. just deal with it and play normal with ur child.
in time, the table might turn, and even if it dosnt, it's still natural.
even parents love some children more Dan d oda, but because of maturity'' we don't show it, well, ur 5 month old dosnt have that maturity, so, let him grow!!!

airminem:
[b]I am complaining again

Perhaps your baby has noticed you are always complaining.

[quote author=ekanDamie post=53581332]
lol, I understand u. this are possible reasons
1. kids listen to voices of their parents while in the tummy.
I might presume, u are not that mother that plays and sing to ur child in d tummy, and even while feeding and bathing him, do u sing and play with him? cos male children bond more with the mother.

2. it's not a competition who a child should love more, but I get it, it can be really annoying for d oda party but, don't take such anger on the child, u will end up resenting him n pushing him further to the father, so, even if he doesn't rap with u DAT much, still engage him ESP wen the father is not around. try to be so friendly with him, not to compete with the father, but because u love him too as a child.

3. bonding could be natural, children are fascinated by alot of things, ur hubby's face, smell, and even voice might be alluring to the baby. just deal with it and play normal with ur child.

Thanks, I Am Encouraged