Of recent, there has been what seems like an increase in the incidences of domestic violence, with women being physically abused by their husbands. The other day, I had to sit through Tonto Dike’s video in which she described the fate she had suffered in the hands of her husband.

As I watched the video, I could not help the different questions that kept passing through my mind. When did we get to this point exactly? Why does it seem like men change once they get married to a lady?

In my confusion, I asked a friend of mine who is supposedly married. The answer she gave me baffled me. She told me that I should also ask what the woman did. It was then it struck me, women have been so brainwashed by the society that they think that any act of abuse they get at the receiving end of is their fault because of something they may or may not have done.

We need to get something clear, for a man to lay his hands on you in an act of abuse, it means he sees you as less than human, and does not have a single iota of respect for you. Many of these men do not even beat their children but would readily lift their hands against their wife as though she were a good purchased in the market. Let me ask a question, how many cohabiting men fight and throw punches at themselves? So if you would not beat a man up to make your point, why would your wife, someone you claim to love, someone you have sex with and a lot of it, become an easy target for you?

Again it boils down to the entitlement mentality a lot of men have. They feel that once they have married a woman, she has become one of their properties, a tool to be used for whatsoever purposes they like. This is the reason why a man would disrespect his wife in the most gruesome manner of inflicting physical injuries.

Dear ladies, it takes two to make a marriage work. It is true that God does not like divorce but he sure doesn’t want you losing your sanity because of a man. We have passed that stage where you want to stay in a marriage because of your children because believe me you are doing more harm to them than good. If the heat gets too much, leave the kitchen before you get burnt. There is more to life than marriage.



http://tushmagazine.com.ng/increasing-rise-domestic-violence/

cc; seun, lalasticala, mynd44

All these online feminists posting shit all day........you women should to bridle your tongue! And watch domestic violence reduce by 50%

how do we speak out about verbal and emotional abuse o?

Hmmm...the issue is on a downward spiral. Na only God fit save His people o. I strongly believe people who wish to tie the knot should at least be good friends and respect each other. If you respect me, you wouldn't raise your hands on me...vise visa. Also, can peolle watch their mouths too? Chai! I'm allergic to people with caustic mouths. May God keep them fat away from me.

kurupt1:
All these online feminists posting shit all day........you women should to bridle your tongue! And watch domestic violence reduce by 50%

You are the type that will hit your woman
And your reason will be cos she lashed her tongue at you

What happened to walking away?

Great post, OP. Good to see a post like this coming from a man.

[Domestic] violence against women does seem to be increasing in Nigeria.

@ your brainwash point: yup, it's very unfortunate that some women have been brainwashed to belief it's their fault when their husbands physically abuses them.

kurupt1:
All these online feminists posting shit all day........you women should to bridle your tongue! And watch domestic violence reduce by 50%

Potential wife-beater alert.

Nothing justifies being violent towards a woman/physically abusing her, or anyone for that matter.

Dyt:

You are the type that will hit your woman And your reason will be cos she lashed her tongue at you
What happened to walking away?

na ur type dey find gentleman na

Martin124:
na ur type dey find gentleman na

Lemme

Dyt:

Lemme

I pray ooo,,,

Dyt:


You are the type that will hit your woman
And your reason will be cos she lashed her tongue at you

What happened to walking away?

issorrite continue to insult ur hubby and continue to expect him to continue to walk away......one day monkey go go market he no come back!!

Women are the peacemakers in the home not warmongers. Women should watch how adult men interact with each other and learn from their interactions,they hardly insult each other but when insults begin to fly between two men na fight remain o.make una continue to talk carelessly to una hubby una hearask Tonto Dike abt her experience, a lot of men especially the gangsta men go react oo

let's not forget the reverse case. domestic violence against men. its more common than you think.

Domestic violence in all forms must be stopped, verbal abuse or not ...No woman or man deserves physical harm from a spouse or partner.

One thing i realise when it comes to violence or divorce in marriage is this
People marry for the sake of what their parents want.. Most times they don't marry whom they truly love and compatible with.
A man wants to marry a lady from benue state. After courting for like 4years and he eventually tell his parents. Mum, dad I want to settle down and Av seen my bride. The parents will ask? She's from which clan in Anambra, possibly they are from Anambra. He will look perplexed. Clan?
Then he laughs nervously.. And replies but dad she's not igbo.. She's from middle belt. Benue to be precise.
Both parents will scream Tufia!
God forbid. Benue what? If u dare marry her u cease to be my son.
After all the arguments and quarrels. He breaks up with his sweetheart and marries one igbo lady matchmaked my his mum. Tell me why won't such man see his wife as a property? Why won't he raise his hands on her at the slightest provocation??
He will even beat her black and blue.
Parents should hands-off their sons or daughters choice of companion.
That's all.

Thank you for your kind compliment.

NotOfThis:
Great post, OP. Good to see a post like this coming from a man.

[Domestic] violence against women does seem to be increasing in Nigeria.

@ your brainwash point: yup, it's very unfortunate that some women have been brainwashed to belief it's their fault when their husbands physically abuses them.




Potential wife-beater alert.

Nothing justifies being violent towards a woman/physically abusing her, or anyone for that matter.