To all the couples out there
I have discovered that love doesn't guarantee the success of a relationship. Love cannot help you stick to one person all years round, and on the other hand, cheating isn't always a product of not loving your partner. In fact, loving someone doesn't guarantee not falling in love with someone else. Relationships work out mostly because of our head not our heart. It works out because of our emotional maturity, empathetic intelligence and self discipline because, time will come when you'll see more beautiful, handsome, romantic, intelligent, sexy, rich, curvy and God fearing people than the one you're in a relationship with. In those times, love will not help you; self control will help you, emotional intelligence will come to your rescue and commitment will keep you going. With those characteristics, no matter how you feel for someone else, the person you're committed to will rank first in your life. You think happily married people don't see better people than the ones they married? You think they don't feel funny sometimes? You think they don't catch feelings? They do! But understanding that commitment is greater than feelings is the great arsenal that do destroy that impulse. You can fall in love with anyone, but building a relationship takes absolutely more than what attracted you to them and takes more than love. We are too fond of loving when it's convenient and sweet. We are too fond of loving when love is there but that can only last for just the first 3-6 months of the relationship. After then, you'll realise that the feelings have dropped, it's now your responsibility to make it work, not love's responsibility. Relationships cannot be readymade. You have to build it and it's never always about love, it requires commitment and intelligence. On the long run in marriages, it's not just love that keeps them together forever, it's determination and commitment. Everyone falls in love; it takes little or no effort to do that. But staying in love? Building a relationship? Only the strong and most committed one do that.

Thanks!

Great

commitment and intelligent great writeup

My Husband Is My Hero A GOOD WOMAN, MAKES A GOOD WIFE AND A GOOD WIFE BECOMES A GOOD MOTHER. A GOOD MOTHER GIVES BIRTH TO A GOOD CHILD. IF YOU WANT TO BE ONE EMULATE THESE STEPS BELLOW: 1). Never raise your voice for any reason to your husband. Its a sign of disrespect. 2). Don't expose your husband's weaknesses to your family and friends. It will bounce back at you. You are each other's keeper. 3). Never use attitudes and moods to communicate to your husband, you never know how your husband will interpret them. Defensive women don't have a happy home. 4). Never compare your husband to other men, you've no idea what their life is all about. If you attack his Ego, his Love for you will diminish. 5). Never ill treat your husband's friends because you don't like them, the person who's supposed to get rid of them is your husband. 6). Never forget that your husband married you, not your maid or anyone else. Do your duties. 7). Never assign anyone to give attention to your husband, people may do everything else but your husband is your own responsibility. . Never blame your husband if he comes back home empty handed. Rather encourage him. 9). Never be a wasteful wife, your husband's sweat is too precious to be wasted. 10). Never pretend to be sick for the purpose of denying your husband's right. You must give it to him how he wants it. It's very important to Men, if you keep denying him, it is a matter of time before another woman takes over that duty. No man can withstand on starvation for too long. 11). Never compare your husband to your one time Ex-lover. Your home may Never recover from it if you do. 12). Never answer for your husband in public opinion polls, let him handle what is directed to him although he may answer for you in public opinion polls. 13). Never shout or challenge your husband in front of children. Wise Women don't do that. 14). Don't forget to check the smartness of your husband before he checks out. 15). Never allow your friends to be too close to your husband. 16). Never be in a hurry in the bathroom and on the dressing table. Out there your husband is always surrounded by women who took their time on their looks. 17). Your parents or family or friends do not have the final say in your marriage. Don't waste your time looking up to them for a final word. You must Leave if you want to Cleave. 18). Never base your love on monetary things. Will you still submit to him even if you earn more money than him? 19). Don't forget that husbands want attention and good listeners, never be too busy for him. Good communication is the bed rock of every happy home. 20). If your idea worked better than his, never compare yourself to him. Its always team work. 21). Don't be too judgmental to your husband. No man wants a Nagging wife. 22). A lazy wife is a careless wife. She doesn't even know that her body needs a bath. 23). Does your husband like a kind of cooked food? Try to change your cooking. No man jokes with food. 24). Never be too demanding to your husband, enjoy every moment, resource as it comes. 25). Make a glass of water the very first welcome to your husband and everyone entering your home. Sweetness of attitude is true beauty. 26). Don't associate with women who have a wrong mental attitude about marriage. 27). Your marriage is as valuable to you as the value that you give it. Recklessness is unacceptable. 28) A confrontational wife, can never keep a good husband and her home, she will be grooming irresponsible daughters without manners. 29) A woman who cannot manage her children, home and husband is a complete failure in life no matter her achievements. 30) A wise woman honors her husband, and respect him, in turn the husband will cherish her and love her dearly - it will be natural. Husband is a beautiful gift from God, no woman can stay without a husband. No good man on earth can tolerate a confrontational and argumentative wife except they have lost their value and become less of a real man. 31). Fruit of the womb is a blessing from the Lord, love your children and teach them well. 32). You are never too old to influence your home. Never reduce your care for your family for any reason. 33). A prayerful wife is very wise and intelligent and she is a better equipped wife, pray always for your husband and family. Conquer all your challenges and problems with prayers, only God can solve our problems - not parent, not pastors, not Alfas, not anybody but, only you and God. Share it with every woman you know. You never know whose marriage you are about to save. And to every man so that the women in their lives can be better guided.

Alhamdulillah. I thank God for the gift of life.
Good morning everyone.............

Alennsar:
To all the couples out there

I have discovered that love doesn't guarantee the
success of a relationship. Love cannot help you
stick to one person all years round, and on the
other hand, cheating isn't always a product of not
loving your partner. In fact, loving someone
doesn't guarantee not falling in love with
someone else.
Relationships work out mostly because of our
head not our heart. It works out because of our
emotional maturity, empathetic intelligence and
self discipline because, time will come when you'll
see more beautiful, handsome, romantic,
intelligent, sexy, rich, curvy and God fearing
people than the one you're in a relationship with.
In those times, love will not help you; self control
will help you, emotional intelligence will come to
your rescue and commitment will keep you going.
With those characteristics, no matter how you feel
for someone else, the person you're committed to
will rank first in your life.
You think happily married people don't see better
people than the ones they married? You think
they don't feel funny sometimes? You think they
don't catch feelings? They do!
But understanding that commitment is greater
than feelings is the great arsenal that do destroy
that impulse.
You can fall in love with anyone, but building a
relationship takes absolutely more than what
attracted you to them and takes more than love.
We are too fond of loving when it's convenient
and sweet. We are too fond of loving when love is
there but that can only last for just the first 3-6
months of the relationship. After then, you'll
realise that the feelings have dropped, it's now
your responsibility to make it work, not love's
responsibility.
Relationships cannot be readymade. You have to
build it and it's never always about love, it
requires commitment and intelligence. On the long
run in marriages, it's not just love that keeps
them together forever, it's determination and
commitment.
Everyone falls in love; it takes little or no effort to
do that. But staying in love? Building a
relationship? Only the strong and most committed
one do that.

Love is sufficient in all things....love is not feelings..it is a conscious decision to do that which is righteousness. Anyone who can fulfill Love's definition in Corinthians 13, as given by God will have no problem...I'm talking of both spouse now....there must be a balance...both are required to love....not one-sided

twosquare:
Love is sufficient in all things....love is not feelings..it is a conscious decision to do that which is righteousness. Anyone who can fulfill Love's definition in Corinthians 13, as given by God will have no problem...I'm talking of both spouse now....there must be a balance...both are required to love....not one-sided

I never deny love because I know its very essential in marriage. But I still believe that it is not enough.

Alennsar:


I never deny love because I know its very essential in marriage. But I still believe that it is not enough.

It is enough; Love drives everything that is good in the universe. If you say feelings aren't enough...then that's great. I would agree with you but to say love isn't enough...no no no....What you see most 99.9% of people have isn't love but feelings (chemical), and when such situations go bad, they jump out like a deer. Now, check the Scripture's definition of love and tell me if it isn't enough:

Corinthians 13

" Love suffers long and is kind; How many spouses are kind to one another in today's world? As in KIND...or have long-suffering to be able to put up with a situation until it is rectified (this speaks of faith and hope).

love does not envy; Some are envious as if they are not hubby and wifey...one buys a car, the next thing is, are you the husband or me? One is lifted up than the other in monetary terms, the next thing is to be envious of the headship of the house and usurp it, or one build a house; no...i can't go there because of ego, forgetting that they both own each other.

love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;Pride in simple terms, parade or vaunt means to boast about or praise excessively, either you mean it for good or bad; knowing your spouse does not like some things, or you are too proud to say I'm sorry when needed

5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; You know what this means..glaring, how many families (hubby and wife now) do not behave rudely to one another either by speech or actions, seek its own (selfish)- either monetarily, sexually or otherwise...just plain selfishness, angered unnecessarily and will keep malice and all that, thinks no evil...even those who swore before God to be one will batter each other and molest or abuse...we all see it in the news now....all kind of evil..marry a second wife, cheat on husband or wife....I can go on and on

6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; Bad things happen, shit happens, mistakes happen, but you can't bury the hatchet...spouses glorifying in their escapades secretly or openly....know that iniquity is also a lifestyle, same with truth...the lifestyle of Truth you can't find in families, love champions this..it rejoices in truth...and truth is rightness...a wife or husband who rejoices in truth won't break the vow of his/her marriage and matrimonial bed....

7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. This explains itself...no endurance...your wife won't always be figure 8, child will come, fat will come, v-jay will expand....the fitness of the man and six packs will wane...but no we cannot bear that, believe that things can change, hope for a better and successful man or wife will can build from scratch and stop looking at another 'watered' fellow who also was taken care of by someone else...we cannot endure when finances are down and know weeping might endure for a night but joy comes in the morning

8 Love never fails. Finally, love never fails, it is always new, it never wanes in a marriage if you keep to its tenets, instructions, and precepts...it won't fail anyone who is the disciple of love...love is ever fresh and ever new even when shapes are gone, money is gone and what you have is each other...and love also knows that anyone who can not provide for his/her family is worse than an infidel; we have many commandments of love in this just 7 to 8 verses.

Now, Alenssar...if you cannot fulfill all these....do not tell me you have love (I included or anyone on this forum says he or she loves so so so and so...you only have feelings which can dissipate with time...love never fails..love conquers time. Amen.

Cc. Seun, Lalasticlala, RoyalRoy