"Quickies" certainly have their time and place, but

couples who continuously skip pre-intimacy are passing up a
great way to get emotionally and physically warmed up
for a romp. "pre-intimacy is crucial for good sex," says Debra
Herbenick, PhD, MPH , director of the Center for Sexual
Health Promotion at Indiana University in Bloomington.

"It's not just an old wives’ tale that pre-intimacy is something
that people should spend more time doing."
Read on to discover the physicial and emotional benefits
of pre-intimacy, plus how to incorporate more of it into your
sexual routine.
The Benefits of pre-intimacy
Doing anything that's sexually arousing can help a
woman lubricate, which in turn may help a man get and
maintain an erection. Dr. Herbenick says that when a
man is having difficulty achieving climax, he may find it
easier if he and his partner have engaged in pre-intimacy
before sex.
For women, pre-intimacy can actually make sex more
pleasurable. "When a woman's body becomes aroused,
the vaginal muscles pull the uterus up a bit, making moren
room in the vagina," says Herbenick. This process, called
vaginal tenting, creates more space, which makes sex
more enjoyable. "If this doesn't happen, sex may be
uncomfortable for a woman.
pre-intimacy can also help a couple feel closer and more
intimate, which ultimately may lead both partners to feel
more aroused, says Herbenick. pre-intimacy is really "about
building an emotional connection and getting some
excitement going," she says.
How to Communicate About pre-intimacy

You can't know what your partner
likes and wants during pre-intimacy if you
don't talk about it. "People don't
spend enough time just talking to

each other when they're not having
sex," says Herbenick. So ask your partner questions
about how he or she wants to be touched, stroked, kissed,
and caressed — but talk about it outside of the bedroom.

"While it's helpful to get information about how your
partner wants to be touched in the moment, it's easier to
have those conversations when you're not about to have
sex," says Herbenick.
5 Ways to Include pre-intimacy in Your Sexual
Routine

There is no good or bad method of pre-intimacy, and you don't
have to spend hours cuddling, stroking, and kissing
before you can move on to sex. A few minutes of pre-intimacy
may be all you need.

"Aim for at least 10 minutes to give your bodies enough
time to warm up," suggets Herbenick. What's important is
to "focus on kissing and stroking the stomach, inner
thighs, and breasts before moving toward the genitals,"
she notes.

To get your minds and bodies warmed up for sex, try
these ways to incorporate pre-intimacy into your routine:
1. Play a game. Consider purchasing sex games that offer
tips and rules on what to do to each other.

2. Talk dirty. Say what you're feeling, what you want your
partner to do, and what you're thinking.

3. Get close. Try different ways to touch and hold each
other, such as dancing or showering together.

4. Use oils and flavored products. Give each other back,
foot, or full body massages with an oil or lotion. Pour
chocolate, whipped cream, or other tasty delights on your
partner's skin, and take your time licking it off.

5. Touch each other. Caress your partner's face, run your
fingers through the hair, and gently tickle the insides of
the arms, the stomach, and the thighs. Rub against each
other or lightly tickle — whatever feels good

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That number 4, wat if my wife is from ibadan?!

Educative post