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What is a KISS? - It's an upper PREPARATION for a lower INVASION that will lead to further PENETRATION with fast ACCELERATION that will build next GENERATION.

Why is a penis better than a credit card? - Once spent it recharges itself; it is accepted worldwide; and the wife can use it as much as she wants.

Teacher asks, “Which part of the body goes to heaven first?” Kid replies, “The legs, because every night I see mom’s legs up high and screaming oh God, I’m coming!”


What’s Closest to a Woman’s Period? – Man’s paycheck; it comes once a month and lasts 4 or 5 days. If it doesn't come, man’s bleeped!


Little Girl - Mommy, I just found out that our neighbor's' son has a penis like a peanut! You mean it's small, replies her mom. No, it’s salty, she screams!

Newly Wed - A couple recently married was happy with the whole thing. According to the couple, he is happy with the hole, and she is happy with the thing.

Man and Three Babies - A man is carrying three babies on a train. The lady sitting next to him asks: Are they your babies? Man replies, “No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer complaints.”


Let’s Play Magic - Guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, “Wanna play magic?” Lady replies, “What is that?” He says, “We go Home, screw, and then you disappear.”

Pussy Cat – Teacher asks pupil, “Why did you bring your cat to school?” Pupil replies, “Because I heard my sister's boyfriend say, “Today I will eat your pussy.”

Don’t Touch – Mom says to daughter, “Didn't I tell you if a stranger touches your breast say DON’T; and if he touches your pussy say STOP?” Daughter replies, “But mom, he touched both, so I told him DON’T STOP!