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My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos - Travel - Nairaland

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My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Naijasinglegirl: 7:59am On May 08, 2017
I was told I would need passport photographs, copies of my birth certificate and my certificate of origin to apply for an international passport. No one mentioned the N1,000 and N500 tips here and there.



I met a crowd under a canopy who came for the same purpose when I arrived the passport office in Ikeja. My contact gave me a form to fill and told me to join them. After waiting for more than three hours, I was told my file won’t be processed until I had a guarantor, a challenge that took me two weeks to fix.



When I returned two weeks later for what they call capturing, I met an even larger crowd triggered by the shortage of passport booklets. Among the crowd were returnees who were there to renew their passport. You know the usual IJGB signs – tattoos, bling-blings, jerry curl hair, weird haircuts, wanna ganna accent, singlets and shorts with winter boots etc.



One guy walked in with a basket ball displaying all of the above signs. It appeared he was there earlier in the day to renew his passport but left when he couldn’t stand the queue. An officer came out to pacify the crowd and this guy, who decided to be our mouthpiece shouted, “Damn man! Shit iz taking too long. We aint gat all day here. I gat practice by 4 man.”

Then he turned to me and said, “Mest up country yo!” Me, I was just like, O-O



4pm, we were still waiting. Another officer came out to call names and the Americana’s name was exempted. This time around, he broke into pidgin in a clear Nigerian accent. “Officer I don tire to dey wait! Person go come die ontop passport! Na wa oh”

People who heard him earlier were laughing. Then he stormed into the main building angrily. It wasn’t long my name was called in for capturing. Beside the capturing office is an iron gate which serves as a jail and Americana and his basketball were doing time there. Apparently he had gone in to make trouble and one of the no-nonsense officers had bundled him into the jail. This time I heard him swearing in Americana, pidgin and Yoruba.



I walked into the capturing room and the capturing officer took one look at me and walked me out. He said they weren’t going to photograph me because I was not dressed properly. I was befuddled seeing that I was dressed in a sleeveless maxi dress which is decent enough in my own opinion. However, I quietly left in search of whom to borrow jacket from but I found no one.

There was a ‘Nigerian mother’ seated outside with their signature scarf wrapped around her neck. I explained my situation and asked her if I could borrow her scarf for a few minutes. After an eternity of staring at me from feet to head as though my approach was disrespectful, she grudgingly handed her scarf to me.

I returned to the office with the scarf wrapped around my shoulder.

When I overheard another officer say, “This her hair eh,” I knew I was in for part two.



The capturing officer told me to pack my weaves. I did just that with a rubber band. He complained my left ear was not visible. I tucked my weaves behind my ears. He said my forehead was not completely visible.



I took off the wig.



The man was shocked. Some people present were giggling. A girl who was on the queue for capturing said the officer should attend to other people while she assist me with adjusting the wig. Left for her I would have taken that passport peacefully in my didi hairstyle.

Five minutes of being told to tilt my neck clockwise, semi clockwise and anti-clockwise in front of the camera, I was successfully captured.

By then, the woman who gave me the scarf had barged in to demand for it. I returned it to her and she held it by an edge as though I had infected the scarf with a virus.

One of the officers who gave me tough time had quietly slipped his phone number to me while I signed out. Outside the office, two elderly female officers called me aside and started lecturing me on indecent dressing. They said I was supposed to wear a suit to take the passport so I don’t end up being mistaken for someone who is travelling for prostitution by the officials at foreign airports. I told them it was the work of the devil.

On the good side, I now own an international passport.

Italy here I come!




http://www.naijasinglegirl.com/all-the-drama-that-happens-at-passport-office-in-lagos/

181 Likes 14 Shares

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by donmalcolm21(m): 8:01am On May 08, 2017
grin

1 Like

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by UrennaNkoli(f): 8:05am On May 08, 2017
Its fu**ed up everywhere in nigeria. The only thing those fools are good at is wasting your time.

27 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Funjosh(m): 8:08am On May 08, 2017
Then he turned to me and said, “Mest up country yo!” Me, I was just like, O-O





You for just reply am like this "Ya Mest up country ya" grin grin grin

56 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Nobody: 8:09am On May 08, 2017
I didn't read..
But I bet my balls it would hit front page!!

6 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by SuperSuave(m): 8:13am On May 08, 2017
it's NSG, FP straight!

bia nsg, wetin you wan go do for Italy? hope it's not what I'm thinking

5 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by dingbang(m): 8:13am On May 08, 2017
Naijasinglegirl please advise me ... I want to get mine too...
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Young03(m): 8:23am On May 08, 2017
Too early to read a textbook

2 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by pat1612(m): 8:36am On May 08, 2017
Why not let naira take charge i hardly wait for immigration works, the officers on duty will work if u pump naira like blood and within no time they will see u off at gate with assurance and deadline to pick it up.

13 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by sisisioge: 8:49am On May 08, 2017
grin grin grin

Very funny...can't stop laughing biko.

4 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by khalhokage(m): 8:55am On May 08, 2017
Mest up country for real yo! grin
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Nobody: 9:10am On May 08, 2017
NSG don come again o!
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by lovethchioma(f): 9:11am On May 08, 2017
Very funny... NSG you won't kill someone here o.
My dear it is everywhere o.. Just to get a passport they'll stress someone's life plus the tips here and there that one will have to pay...

1 Like

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Naijasinglegirl: 9:35am On May 08, 2017
Sarcasm
SuperSuave:
it's NSG, FP straight!

bia nsg, wetin you wan go do for Italy? hope it's not what I'm thinking

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Babamide(m): 10:25am On May 08, 2017
It is the work of the devil. grin grin
Besides wetin u dey find go Italy?

4 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by armadeo(m): 5:33pm On May 08, 2017
pat1612:
Why not let naira take charge i hardly wait for immigration works, the officers on duty will work if u pump naira like blood and within no time they will see u off at gate with assurance and deadline to pick it up.

I tell you.

No need for long story. When I did mine it was like magic. I came in the afternoon and didn't spend 30mins

Was smuggled in through one door and presto passport captured.

I tire for naija

2 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by armadeo(m): 5:34pm On May 08, 2017
Babamide:
It is the work of the devil. grin grin
Besides wetin u dey find go Italy?

She's doing it NSG style


Sarcasm

1 Like

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by julioralph(m): 10:14pm On May 08, 2017
Naijasinglegirl:


....

I took off the wig.



The man was shocked. Some people present were giggling.
A girl who was on the queue for capturing said the officer should attend to other people while she assist me with adjusting the wig. Left for her I would have taken that passport peacefully in my didi hairstyle.

....




http://www.naijasinglegirl.com/all-the-drama-that-happens-at-passport-office-in-lagos/

tongue tongue tongue

Rock your natural, beautiful, gorgeous, God given african hair, una no gree...

.... lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed

2 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by hahn(m): 10:26pm On May 08, 2017
naijasinglegirl, how much did the passport cost you?
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Nobody: 10:37pm On May 08, 2017
Next time dress decently to avoid the drama

1 Like

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by sholay2011(m): 11:49pm On May 08, 2017
This is a classic. grin grin grin

Thumbs up NSG.

5 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by good4all40: 1:41am On May 09, 2017
Nigeria is only country in the World that has everything but her citizens lack everything

2 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Lucasbalo(m): 3:56am On May 09, 2017
Naijasinglegirl:
I was told I would need passport photographs, copies of my birth certificate and my certificate of origin to apply for an international passport. No one mentioned the N1,000 and N500 tips here and there.



I met a crowd under a canopy who came for the same purpose when I arrived the passport office in Ikeja. My contact gave me a form to fill and told me to join them. After waiting for more than three hours, I was told my file won’t be processed until I had a guarantor, a challenge that took me two weeks to fix.



When I returned two weeks later for what they call capturing, I met an even larger crowd triggered by the shortage of passport booklets. Among the crowd were returnees who were there to renew their passport. You know the usual IJGB signs – tattoos, bling-blings, jerry curl hair, weird haircuts, wanna ganna accent, singlets and shorts with winter boots etc.



One guy walked in with a basket ball displaying all of the above signs. It appeared he was there earlier in the day to renew his passport but left when he couldn’t stand the queue. An officer came out to pacify the crowd and this guy, who decided to be our mouthpiece shouted, “Damn man! Shit iz taking too long. We aint gat all day here. I gat practice by 4 man.”

Then he turned to me and said, “Mest up country yo!” Me, I was just like, O-O



4pm, we were still waiting. Another officer came out to call names and the Americana’s name was exempted. This time around, he broke into pidgin in a clear Nigerian accent. “Officer I don tire to dey wait! Person go come die ontop passport! Na wa oh”

People who heard him earlier were laughing. Then he stormed into the main building angrily. It wasn’t long my name was called in for capturing. Beside the capturing office is an iron gate which serves as a jail and Americana and his basketball were doing time there. Apparently he had gone in to make trouble and one of the no-nonsense officers had bundled him into the jail. This time I heard him swearing in Americana, pidgin and Yoruba.



I walked into the capturing room and the capturing officer took one look at me and walked me out. He said they weren’t going to photograph me because I was not dressed properly. I was befuddled seeing that I was dressed in a sleeveless maxi dress which is decent enough in my own opinion. However, I quietly left in search of whom to borrow jacket from but I found no one.

There was a ‘Nigerian mother’ seated outside with their signature scarf wrapped around her neck. I explained my situation and asked her if I could borrow her scarf for a few minutes. After an eternity of staring at me from feet to head as though my approach was disrespectful, she grudgingly handed her scarf to me.

I returned to the office with the scarf wrapped around my shoulder.

When I overheard another officer say, “This her hair eh,” I knew I was in for part two.



The capturing officer told me to pack my weaves. I did just that with a rubber band. He complained my left ear was not visible. I tucked my weaves behind my ears. He said my forehead was not completely visible.



I took off the wig.



The man was shocked. Some people present were giggling. A girl who was on the queue for capturing said the officer should attend to other people while she assist me with adjusting the wig. Left for her I would have taken that passport peacefully in my didi hairstyle.

Five minutes of being told to tilt my neck clockwise, semi clockwise and anti-clockwise in front of the camera, I was successfully captured.

By then, the woman who gave me the scarf had barged in to demand for it. I returned it to her and she held it by an edge as though I had infected the scarf with a virus.

One of the officers who gave me tough time had quietly slipped his phone number to me while I signed out. Outside the office, two elderly female officers called me aside and started lecturing me on indecent dressing. They said I was supposed to wear a suit to take the passport so I don’t end up being mistaken for someone who is travelling for prostitution by the officials at foreign airports. I told them it was the work of the devil.

On the good side, I now own an international passport.

Italy here I come!




http://www.naijasinglegirl.com/all-the-drama-that-happens-at-passport-office-in-lagos/
The best post of the month so far. Was laughing my tails off. Consider being a comic writer. Once again, nice job.

12 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Naijasinglegirl: 6:16am On May 09, 2017
35k including tips
hahn:
naijasinglegirl, how much did the passport cost you?

5 Likes

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Kusibe77(m): 6:23am On May 09, 2017
Italy?

well, what do I know?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by hahn(m): 6:45am On May 09, 2017
Naijasinglegirl:
35k including tips

Thanks
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by Afam4eva(m): 10:38pm On May 09, 2017
Naijasinglegirl:

Italy here I come!
ITALY? Don't tell me you;re going to see the pope.

1 Like

Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by busky101(m): 3:17am On May 10, 2017
Hian, hope ur not going for all dose nanny jobs in Asia and Arab countries dem, am fearing for u o.......
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by SlimBrawnie(f): 9:34am On May 10, 2017
Heard someone has decided to sponsor your trip to any part of the world. Congrats girl.
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by grimandevil: 5:29pm On May 11, 2017
Are you @officialEFCC? Someone said you are. Talk true
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by grimandevil: 5:30pm On May 11, 2017
Is already on twitter
Re: My Funny Experience At Passport Office In Lagos by vamum: 6:48pm On May 11, 2017
Naijasinglegirl:
35k including tips

And the insults, you forgot to add that grin grin grin grin grin

4 Likes

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