One of my friends confided in me , she is desperately waiting for my response but I'm dragging my feet because I really dont know what to say in this situation so i need your opinion.
no insult Please.

My friend met a guy through an online dating site who lives abroad ,they both fell in love and no day passes without video chats and all the social media engagement to keep the bond and relationship going .

it's one year now but the guy hasn't come home, always bringing up one excuse or the other. Apparently he has proposed to her online because she is wearing an engagement ring.

He promise to come home this December on her birthday to get married to her but she is confused because the guy doesn't send her money not even when she was broke and without a job.

She is scared of getting married to a stingy man who won't look after her in the future.

Do you think that she should marry a such man?

She is greedy on the other hand. she accepted marrying the man cus he is base abroad and probably loaded. The man might just be taking his time to ensure he is not dealing with a runs girl. demanding for money at this stage might spoil her chance.

Does she have a father or mother?They are the ones responsible for giving her money.

I have reservations about someone you have not met coming to marry you.You both need to see PHYSICALLY first before deciding to marry.
You can't tell if he is stingy or not,there has to be a physical connection IMO before judging.

How did she get the engagement ring??

All i will say is that, she has to separate her heart from head. If her heart is always in control, she has the tendency to get hooked on the wrong guy and get her heart in a bind.

I will advice her to forget all the romantic chat online, and get to know him more when he comes back to Nigeria

You and your friend no too well! E-dating, E- engagement... Biko make them do E-marriage. By the time they eventually meet, something would have to give.

Whew! No vex. I bin just dey wonder if you or your friend doesn't know that no serious minded person ever makes a lifelong decision based on virtual encounters. The A you know OTA will definitely be different from the A in real life. Biko, tell your friend to meet this bobo before thinking about marriage.


Plus there's that teeny tiny issue of stinginess...who she offend? It is well o.

I don't understand this kind of dating but I guess it works. Because marriage is not like that unless she wants to end up divorced. (God forbid).
if she is not desperate or see it as an opportunity to travel out of this country to a better place of course, I think she have to see this guy face to face know his family likewise hers too let either her father or mother or both, her religious leader and or a friend or two that she trust do some kinds of findings on this guy, after all this people will witness her wedding but I believe they won't want her to suffer in marriage or divorce. I still see online dating with high risk unless both parties can create time to see or they want to do online husband and wife lol!!!. For her which her best of luck

Well she can't conclude from a long distance relationship until they meet.
What if he has a pungent natural cologne? BO or MO or both combined?
But then again he just might be everything she's hoped he is. But first they need to meet and get to actually know each other better? Is he a service provider? Is she deep? Hehe I mean Are the Sexually compatible?
Mk she no rush in just to rush out.

Sunnymatey:
She is greedy on the other hand. she accepted marrying the man cus he is base abroad and probably loaded. The man might just be taking his time to ensure he is not dealing with a runs girl. demanding for money at this stage might spoil her chance.

Hmmmm.. noted

Babamide:
How did she get the engagement ring??

by herself ooo. He told her to buy it .

bottlewater1:
I don't understand this kind of dating but I guess it works. Because marriage is not like that unless she wants to end up divorced. (God forbid).
if she is not desperate or see it as an opportunity to travel out of this country to a better place of course, I think she have to see this guy face to face know his family likewise hers too let either her father or mother or both, her religious leader and or a friend or two that she trust do some kinds of findings on this guy, after all this people will witness her wedding but I believe they won't want her to suffer in marriage or divorce. I still see online dating with high risk unless both parties can create time to see or they want to do online husband and wife lol!!!. For her which her best of luck

you are just too much. tnx

You hear abroad based and your tentacles stood up abi; if you like close your eyes to the problems you are seeing now. You have been dating a man for a whole year and you still don’t know anything about him, his family nor his abode abroad . Something tells me that you are a very desperate person and your eyes would soon clear if you rush into marriage with this guy. Him dragging his feet tells a lot about him I.e. he is either married or in a serious relationship with someone else and that someone else AIN'T YOU. DO NOT allow desperation make you venture into something you would later regret. Don't overlook the problems you are glaringly seeing now to avoid stories that touch.

Hehehe. I know one girl who always prefers to date guys living abroad, kind of a status thing. 10 years later she has chased all the 'home based' suitors whilst still waiting for the abroad bobo. Enough said.

Your for friend is worrying about the wrong thing.

She should be worried about that guy not being married already and wants to use her as naija wife that he will be visiting every december.

This sounds like a December marriage to me ooo, let her not fall into that trap.

She shld be patient,I once dated a guy abroad we met. On fb in fact dating him online was better than dating home base biloniare in terms of love,attention money, anything at all he was there that was wen I was in sch in fact he did a birthday for me where he is with his friends without telling me he only post and tag me.we dated for 2yrs without seeing each other but after sch I had pressure to get married my dear leaving that guy for someone else here was d greatest regret I have now i met a guy who turned me to a punching bag yet I never leave him only God knows I inventualy married him my life bcoms shattered had I know I wld have kept to online dating and be happy tell her if d guy show her love and she's happy let her wait no rushing.

Damsel21:
She shld be patient,I once dated a guy abroad we met. On fb in fact dating him online was better than dating home base biloniare in terms of love,attention money, anything at all he was there that was wen I was in sch in fact he did a birthday for me where he is with his friends without telling me he only post and tag me.we dated for 2yrs without seeing each other but after sch I had pressure to get married my dear leaving that guy for someone else here was d greatest regret I have now i met a guy who turned me to a punching bag yet I never leave him only God knows I inventualy married him my life bcoms shattered had I know I wld have kept to online dating and be happy tell her if d guy show her love and she's happy let her wait no rushing.

where are those that pressurized u into marriage to come share in the punches now

don't leave,stay there...u hear?

na FP we go read the knife and acid and cutlass part

labonita1:
All i will say is that, she has to separate her heart from head. If her heart is always in control, she has the tendency to get hooked on the wrong guy and get her heart in a bind.

I will advice her to forget all the romantic chat online, and get to know him more when he comes back to Nigeria

WISDOM.

And the babe might even be among those claiming ''hooked '' and ''not searching '' because of one abroad bobo that might have alot of issues on him. Dude might even be a scammer waiting for the right moment to strike.

Naija babes i hail o!

diportivo:




where are those that pressurized u into marriage to come share in the punches now

don't leave,stay there...u hear?

na FP we go read the knife and acid and cutlass part

Hmmmn u need to tell me bro am out already d regret part is what is eating me up,mistake are meant to teach us life I've learned my lesson in a hard way,

Damsel21:
Hmmmn u need to tell me bro am out already d regret part is what is eating me up,mistake are meant to teach us life I've learned my lesson in a hard way,

please,try to get over the regrets

nobody knows what would have been....

while that might av seemed like the life u never had,it might have turned out worse

enjoy the present....live in its fullness

when there's life there's hope

diportivo:


please,try to get over the regrets

nobody knows what would have been....

while that might av seemed like the life u never had,it might have turned out worse

enjoy the present....live in its fullness

when there's life there's hope

thank u so much my point is not all abroad base guys are fake op shld her frnd to b patient and live a happy life

Damsel21:
She shld be patient,I once dated a guy abroad we met. On fb in fact dating him online was better than dating home base biloniare in terms of love,attention money, anything at all he was there that was wen I was in sch in fact he did a birthday for me where he is with his friends without telling me he only post and tag me.we dated for 2yrs without seeing each other but after sch I had pressure to get married my dear leaving that guy for someone else here was d greatest regret I have now i met a guy who turned me to a punching bag yet I never leave him only God knows I inventualy married him my life bcoms shattered had I know I wld have kept to online dating and be happy tell her if d guy show her love and she's happy let her wait no rushing.

Wow!, Since you don't want to leave your hubby for reasons best known to you, why don't you make amend instead of living with regrets.

Btw, op. So your friend has been E-dating, and she got an E-engagement ring or the guy asked she buys one for herself in order to mark his territory. Lol, that's how she'll become "Lord of the ring". Who even accepts to marry someone they've not seen?, she doesn't even know the guy that well. Some ladies sha!.

Benita27:
Wow!, Since you don't want to leave your hubby for reasons best known to you, why don't you make amend instead of living with regrets.

Btw, op. So your friend has been E-dating, and she got an E-engagement ring or the guy asked she buys one for herself in order to mark his territory. Lol, that's how she'll become "Lord of the ring". Who even accepts to marry someone they've not seen?, she doesn't even know the guy that well. Some ladies sha!.

well there wasn't any special reason I only being under pressure to get married without thinking abt my happiness but am out now for good.thank u

Babamide:
How did she get the engagement ring??

I'm wondering too oo.

Jman06:
WISDOM.

And the babe might even be among those claiming ''hooked '' and ''not searching '' because of one abroad bobo that might have alot of issues on him. Dude might even be a scammer waiting for the right moment to strike.

Naija babes i hail o!

i hail you too o!

Seriously, not all abroad guys are fake, as regards marriage things. The thing is that, if you are dating him, pressure him to introduce you to his family here in Nigeria. Take time to know if the family accepts you, its very important. On the issue of the guy not coming home as you would desire. Many things might be giving him serious worries, especially when his Exit and IN coming papers has k-leg. He wouldn't want to travel home probably to marry you and take you back to where he stays, only to be denied visa. That's why he had to stay until his going and coming is secured.

Damsel21:
She shld be patient,I once dated a guy abroad we met. On fb in fact dating him online was better than dating home base biloniare in terms of love,attention money, anything at all he was there that was wen I was in sch in fact he did a birthday for me where he is with his friends without telling me he only post and tag me.we dated for 2yrs without seeing each other but after sch I had pressure to get married my dear leaving that guy for someone else here was d greatest regret I have now i met a guy who turned me to a punching bag yet I never leave him only God knows I inventualy married him my life bcoms shattered had I know I wld have kept to online dating and be happy tell her if d guy show her love and she's happy let her wait no rushing.

Thanks for sharing your story , Regret nothing, if you were meant to marry the online guy, you guys would have been together by now. This is the time for you to pray for God's guidance and direction towards the man you will marry after your previous failed marriage . Don't allow any one pressurize you into anything next time.

freshinko:
Seriously, not all abroad guys are fake, as regards marriage things. The thing is that, if you are dating him, pressure him to introduce you to his family here in Nigeria. Take time to know if the family accepts you, its very important. On the issue of the guy not coming home as you would desire. Many things might be giving him serious worries, especially when his Exit and IN coming papers has k-leg. He wouldn't want to travel home probably to marry you and take you back to where he stays, only to be denied visa. That's why he had to stay until his going and coming is secured.

well, that can also be d case.

Damsel21:
thank u so much my point is not all abroad base guys are fake op shld her frnd to b patient and live a happy life

i will dear, thanks