Relationships tend to blossom when parties involved share common interest, irrespective of the type of relationship. This in a way portrays that, understanding is a vital key element to marriage. In Africa, extended family of couples (father, mother, brother, sister in-laws) often serves as a court that settles a nuclear family’s disputes. As such, it is rarely possible for an African woman to be married to just her husband and not have anything to do with her husband’s family, which often includes the husband’s father, mother, and siblings.

A woman is married into a family and not just an individual from that family, in other words, not just the husband. She is married into the family as a legitimate member of the family through an arrangement that made the woman’s family consider the marriage (bride token). As such, she is expected to co-habit or live her life with respect for the family she’s married into.

If a woman is trying to prevent the family of the husband from coming nearer to her husband, she might annoy her husband’s family who may conspire against her to send her out of her matrimonial home. Many families do not love any woman that always wants to create the barriers of ‘me and my husband alone’. This often upsets the husband’s family. Woman, avoid this as much as possible, the ‘me and my husband alone syndrome’, because, it will not help your relationship with your husband, especially, when you welcome your family with an open arms.
Do this to Keep your Husband

Any woman that wants to keep her husband must be kind and favorably disposed to keep the husband’s family. She should not be angry when any member of her husband’s family visits. She must also welcome any member of her husband’s family who decided to stay with them until he or she is able to get his or her own apartment. Woman, don’t in anyway make trouble with your husband for allowing his relation to stay with you, rather, see it as an opportunity to extend your good will; if you must keep your husband and make him happy.

It make men happy, when they see their wives in good friendship with their relations. Sometimes, the husband’s relation can be suspicious of their brother’s wife, if the brother is well to do and has what the family wants, but seems never ready to part with it. If the wife is not favourably disposed to the husband’s family, they (the husband’s family) may think that it is the wife that has blocked them from having access to their son or brother’s wealth.
Why some Family Members are Hostile

Some family members may become hostile to the wife. Such family member may want to look for a perfect time to strike. The time may just be when the wife has small disagreement with her husband and they get wind of it, then they can instigate the woman before her husband, because he or she that stays with them is nursing grievance against the brother’s wife. Hey! Remember the saying, “Blood is thicker than water”. If a man is going through a trying time, he may likely become easily irritated by his wife, in terms of what he hears. As a result, he may become closer to his family member and open up on his problems to them.

Sometimes however, if the woman is known to be very hostile, the family member of the husband may advise the husband that he needs to send the wife away before the wife kills him. As such, the husband might be pressurized to send his wife away. However, this is scarcely the fate of a wise woman because; she will readily embrace every member of her husband’s family. More so, sharing good times with them makes her husband’s family to develop profound love for her.

In actual sense, a woman is expected to love and honour her husband’s relations, especially, the parents of the husband, if they are still alive so that she can enjoy her marriage to the full and possibly send away any future intruders coming from the husband’s family. A kind hearted woman will always control her husband’s relations, if she’s very caring and understanding.

Consider these Key Elements:

Be reminded that respect is reciprocal. Give your husband’s relations respect, if you must earn their respect
Try as much as possibly to be friendly with them, irrespective of their attitudes towards you. Before long the dividends (positive) will surely come your way
Be homely to any visitor, especially, your husband’s relations
Honour your husband and extend the hand to his parents
Be slow in judging your husband’s family
Be conscious of your words. They are like eggs, once broken, can never be recovered, especially, in the presence of any member of your husband’s family, and it could be used against you, when matter arises.
Buy gifts for your husband’s parent at every given opportunities. It’s not a bribe, it’s a seed that will bring you joy in the future.
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Relationship Spot with: Kingsmond Ehimare

Source: http://www.kingsmond.com/2017/06/19/how-to-keep-your-relationship-with-your-husband-part-1/

Ps: Please feel free to contact me on kingsmond.com1@gmail.com; instagram: @kingsmond_big & twitter: @kingsmond.com

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Kingsmond Ehimare, PhD in-view

www.kingsmond.com
https://web.facebook.com/kingsmond/

oh dear, just today ,my husband's nephew wants to come and stay with us since he just finished his JSS 3 WAEC,I have been so upset,he is a boy and I have 2 girls,and I always wear lingerie most times, and extra feed, Infact lots of things in my mind,God help me. thanks for the encouragement Op.

You are welcome.