₦airaland Forum

And when the union finally succumbs and collapse these same meddling family members will be the first to exonerate themselves from blame.

GoodFaith:
Sorry to tell you
Your father was evil
Ur Father disown his owe kids
Fail to support you. The relationship between your mother and father hasn't to do with supporting
his kids
Reason why USA have child support because of bad people like your father

Despite what he did I still can not call my father a monster. As I grew my anger towards him changed to pity, he was never remorseful but he did show glimpse of regret during the last days before he died. May his soul rest in peace.

Some of the stuffs we see on our local movies are not all figments of someone's imagination.

My dad loved his wife (my mother) he loved us, I know because the memories are still fresh. I'm the eldest, I saw it all, the good the bad and the ugly. Only God knows what happened.

LewsTherin:
Unfortunately I didn't see this topic early enough. But reasing through the entire thread has been frightening. This is especially as I have a wonderful marriage.

How has it been? Has this meeting been held? What steps have you taken and what has been the result? I think it will help more people if they know what advice you took, what steps you took and what the result has been.

The meeting has been put on hold for now. I actually followed some advice I was given here and yesterday my wife came into my room to apologize for everything, she admitted it was all her fault and asked for forgiveness.

It seemed unreal but she called her parents right in my presence and asked them to stop interfering in our business.

Some neighbors pleaded for her, now I can only hope she has learnt her lesson.

I don't think she's a bad person it's just that she's too attached to her parents.

Thanks everyone.

richdad555:
My dear beloved, I am sorry to hear your agony, and from your statement you appear to be ignorant of the word of God and that is the reason why the devil has inflicted you with pain and sorrow in your marriage, most of us follow religion but only few follow Christianity. The answers you seek are all in the word of God. Proverbs 3:6 says; In all your ways submit to God, and he will make your paths straight. It's only God that can make your marriage workout because it is written "By strength shall no man prevail". Pls, do not see your inlaws and wife as the bad guys, the real bad guy is the invincible force manipulating them to break and destroy your happiness in marriage. Allow God to prevail in your marriage by committing your marriage into his mighty hands because the bible says in Proverbs 16:7 When a man's ways are pleasing to the LORD, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. Your wife and inlaws may appear to be your physical enemies in this picture of yours but God will make them to be at peace with you according to the knowledge of the word of God.

I pray and declare today that God Almighty will restore a lasting peace and unity in your matrimonial home because the bible said that "he that finds a wife findeth a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord" and that favour of peace, happiness and God's blessings associated with marriage you will find and experience from today onward in the gracious name of Jesus. Amen!

Amen. Thanks for your words of advice and may God be with you too.

I won't be the one to initiate a separation. Somehow I feel history is repeating itself.

My parents separated when I was in ss1 that was in 1992 my dad sent my mom packing and in less than a year he married another woman and left us to fend for ourselves.

We fell from a subject of admiration and envy (for my dad was not poor) to an object of pity then mockery. I and my siblings suddenly found ourselves on the street wandering from one relative to the other begging for what will keep us alive. I'm the eldest and the youngest was just five years old then.

If you've never been there you can't ever understand. It was hell as in HELL. Till this day I still wonder how the five of us survived that dark period.

By God's grace my children will not suffer what I did when I lived like an orphan.

Suddenly, today, I work for a firm, earn a salary, my kids attend good schools and people are like, your family is cute. My children are living in the same world I did before my parents separated.

Here lies my problem, the thought of my past repeating itself in the lives of my children scares me silly.

It seems my wife and her family has noticed my determination to keep my home intact for the sake of my children. They think I will continue to endure no matter what. A big surprise is coming their way.

ndindiatu:
Ehya . U love marriage but she doesnt

I love a happy home with my children enjoying the presence of both parents in their lives.

pennywys:
poor broke nigga, how I wish you have money ur wife and ur inlaw would respect you. Mind you next time don't bring this trash here

Rich nigger, thank you sir

Guyman02:
Change your attitude, ignore her antics and stop being scared about your kids, she will take care of them even in your absence.
Make yourself happy, stop trying to please your in-laws, just be your true self.
Give directives to your wife and don't repeat your words more than 2 times, if she obeys that's fine, if she disobeys just ignore her and focus on your kids when at home.
Put on the music when you come home and dance with the kids happily, cook and eat with your kids joyfully.
Don't call any meetings between your family and hers except it is to discuss divorce or separation.
Simply ignore your in-laws and see them as irritants to be kept at bay, if you want to do any favours for them do it quietly and don't expect any appreciation, cut off frivolous communication between you and them except when you want to discuss serious isues.
Tell yourself that you are the head of that home, a Lord and a Lion.
With time she will get the message and decide to choose between you and them.
I am talking from personal experience.

Thank you sir

iLegendd:
Some of these married people self. You go into marriage without knowing a dime about relationship and marriage. You let love cloud your reasoning even without knowing how love works.

I wouldn't want to be mean, but I don't see any problem. All I see is a clueless married man.

I'm like that your uncle who was advising you, but you refused to listen. At the moment, I'm advising other young men, but they're currently acting as if they know it all. Their time to create a thread like this is coming...but if they listen, it will be averted.

Anyway, it seems everyone wants to learn from experience.

Have a nice day.

If you are as smart as you claim to be, you would know that many years of courtship does not guarantee that your marriage will be successful.

Anyway your opinion is appreciated.

SamuelAnyawu:
My Full Respect to your Mum.



We all miss you Dora



Senator Samuel Anyanwu for Governor Imo 2019

A very patriotic and hard working woman.

Continue to rest in peace.

I've been discussing with my family and they all agreed that though I've been naive, it's time to call my in-laws to order family to family.

I'm some how relieved after their show of support. I believe a solution will come after the planned meeting even if it means breaking up.

I thank you for your prompt response and I hope Nairaland last forever so people can continue to seek and get help in difficult times.

ShenTeh:
It is really sad the kids we have on this platform.

Someone who's been married for over 9 years -probably longer than you knew your name - comes to seek counsel and your best joke is to lead him in to suicide.

Did your parents not advise you to desist from jumping into matters beyond your cranium?

@OP, It is not too late. You can have your home and control back!
I. Tell your in-laws you detest their interference in running your home. It is not going to be easy, because it seems to me they had enjoyed your introverted nature from forever. They will be shocked! May probably

Looking back, I think I have been worst than an introvert. Iwas so eager to impress my stupid in-laws.
I've given up so much for the sake of the happy home of my dreams. I'm too ashamed to narrate the whole story.

sisisioge:
Hmmm...so sorry to hear this. Whatever it is can be fixed. You could:

1. Invite your family to meet with your other family to plead with them to let your nuclear family run its affairs without interference. There shouldn't be any tense atmosphere there o, just family A pleading with family B to allow your own family AB be autonomous.

2. You could just wait until you notice another interference from them. Then take a few things and move out. Don't be afraid, your children won't die. Stay out until your wife is ready to listen. Then let her know your stand.

Lobatan! By God's grace, you are the head of your family...your wife the neck

My family keep reminding me what I told them from the start. My uncle warned me but I didn't understand him then. When I introduced this lady to him as the person I intend to marry roughly six weeks after I met her, he was shocked, he asked me, do you really know her? do you her family? Probably due to lack of experience I insisted on marrying her since we both love each other. That love has since disappeared and my uncle is vindicated. We have three kids yet my wife place her family above our nuclear family.

[quote author=youngest85 post=68102094]Which worst will happen?
If you wanna commit suicide go ahead and let's know how many of us remain[/quote

There are options worse than suicide, a man just need to keep the devil at bay]

I know similar stories has been narrated on this forum but I want the world to hear my tale of regret and sorrow.

For nine years I've struggled to eliminate family interference from my home but unfortunately I've not been able to. My father in-law and his wife call the shot and when I resist my wife promptly takes side with them claiming that I'm being disrespectful.

From the onset I pleaded with my own family to allow us chat our own path, learn from our mistakes and grow together in love. This has backfired on me because my wife did not do same with her family.

I can't consider breakup, I don't want my kids to grow in a broken home. The problem is worse presently only God can show me the way out of this mess.

Some might say I was weak from the onset, but some women can be manipulative and cunning. I am in a cage right now, I desperately need help before the worst happens.

But why must the senators bewitch IGP, why? Those senators must be identified and transmissioned asap.

This story might be fake but most men have had such experiences

Na waoo