Madam, where's Oga?
Why are you late? I said 2pm and what says your cheap watch?
I am the acting presido! I come when my presidential protocol says! What do you want?
Stop talking to me like that! And, why are you wearing that your bowler hat in front of me?
My heart tells me to wear my hat! Doesn't Oga wear his own hat in front of you?
So now, you want to start yet another rumour about his heart? He has no heart problem!
Oh, that calls for three hearty cheers!
Stop talking about people's heart! Is that why I have called you? To talk about heart?
So, why did you call me here? By the way, which time did you "people" come back?
I won't answer questions that are beneath me! Now, I want you to have a look.
Have a look? At what?
Where are your glasses? Can't you see that ambulance with its doors open? Look!
Is that why I am here to look inside an ambulance in broad day light?

You see the problem with you "people" with nonsense PhD and your cousins with all that Professor titles! You are the ones spoiling this country.
I beg your pardon?
You people like: War-Lay Show-Yinka! Pact-You-Tommy! Door-Raa Aqueen-Yeah-Lee!
Meaning?
PDP is better than PhD!
I am a PDP member with a PhD!
That is why you are the worst! You and that your Door-Raa Aqueen-Yeah-Lee! Both of you started all these! You wish your own boss evil so you can sit on his seat? And your niece, Door-Raa Aqueen-Yeah-Lee! started running that her mouth and even tried to harrass a loyal minister as Aondoakaa! Why did you remove him by demoting him?
We are all sorry that Oga is not feeling well,
Just take a look at the ambulance and tell me what you see!
There's nothing to tell, Madam, the ambulance is empty!
So why do your people go about saying nonsense?
Ehm, with the way your people drove the ambulance from Saudi to Abuja, e get as e be!
E get as wetin be?

Ehm, suddenly NEPA take light and all the airport become dark and soldiers begin to appear from under the ground. Navy and Air Force begin to fall from skies and, in short, e get as e be! Me as the acting presido no even get idea wetin de happen! True true, e get as dat thing come be o! Me I no like am o!
You no like am? You think I care what you like and what you hate? Look inside the ambulance well well before you go address press.
Okay, I see wheel chair!
And?
Only one wheel chair! Wait o! What is that they have written on the wheel chair?
I thought you have a PhD? Read.
Why is the ambulance fitted with a BBC wheel chair? The same BBC that granted that wahala interview to Oga?
Next question? Why should Sunday Oliseh and Samson Siasia assist Glenn Hoddle when we have people like Ojo Mmaduekwe and Michael Aondoakaa?
Are you kidding me, Madam? We are talking politics and you just switched to sports?
Remove that hat let me see your head!
Madam, women cannot see our heads in Naija Delta!
This is Abuja, not Naija Delta. With all your PhD you have no idea what is wrong with our football?
Madam, I have to go back to Executive Council meeting, the ministers are waiting!
Let them wait! I have not finished with you, ka ji kwo?
Besides Ojo Mmaduekwe and Michael Aondoakaa becoming Super Eagles National Coaches, what else do you want?
I want to be the First Lady!
Acting or ex?
Acting!
Madam! You are married to Oga! I am married to Patience! She is already there! Patience has always been there!
So you are married to a Nollywood actress?
What Nollywood actress?
Mama G! Is she not Patience Ozokwo?
Madam, my wife is not an actress. Patience Ozokwo is not my wife! That is Mama G.
Do you think I care? Go now and tell your Mama-G wife that I, Too-Rye, is the one and only First Lady of this country, acting or no-acting!
I gotta go, Ma! But I have one important question: For the record, could you please tell: who drove that ambulance all the way from Saudi?