It never ends, does it? Well, even with the recent crisis in Zimbabwe, Robert Mugabe just can’t be silenced. He’s back in form just at the right time to make us all have a laugh with some undiluted hilarious quotes. You ready? Here we go again with some of the ridiculously funny Robert Mugabe quotes.

1. “Cowards are those who could not beat me when I was young but have decided to do so when I am 93 years.” This is in response to his “house arrest” and installation of his sacked Vice President as the President of Zimbabwe.

2. Some couples are just good on Facebook yet they don’t talk to each other in their homes.

3. Married women should stop putting beautiful pictures and statuses of themselves. Why advertise goods that are no longer in stock?

4. Witchcraft is when you are in class and your manhood decides to erect for no reason. Then the teacher points at you to go and rub the chalkboard.

5. Sometimes you look back at the woman you married, analyze all the problems she has caused you and you realize witchcraft is real.

6. Girls of today will be putting flowers on their heads when they are on Snapchat but they feel shy carrying vegetables to sell for their mothers. God is seeing everything you are doing my sister and the thunder that is going to strike you is still doing press ups.

7. Ladies, it’s always your bestie that is sleeping with your man. Blessed are women without besties.

8. Ladies again if he doesn’t treat you well don’t shave, if he behaves like an animal let him eat in the jungle.

9. If your father is not happy with you living in his house , he should move out. You’re in your father’s house, he should move to his own father’s house.

10. I am 93 years old, my wife is 52 years old; meaning when I was 41 years, my wife Grace was 1 week old. Don’t give up if you’re still single; probably your future partner is not even born yet; or probably your father-in-law and your mother-in-law have not met yet. Have faith today.

11. Every time a girl meets a new African guy “he’s been single for at least 6 months”. My brother your Masters Degree in Lying will backfire one day.

12. Confuse your enemies by repeating clothes. They’ll think today was yesterday.

13. You are pregnant and you’re still wearing high waist jeans. Now when you give birth, your baby’s head comes out looking like a pressed loaf of bread, and you will be complaining and blaming witchcraftcy…Nonsense!

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But, these are old jokes nah..