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You Are Not Your Parents: How To Save A Marriage - Family - Nairaland

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You Are Not Your Parents: How To Save A Marriage by leslimark(m): 6:53am On Dec 20, 2017
The elusive perfect marriage - often sought after, but rarely achieved - many people uphold this image in their minds of what marriage is supposed to look like. We humans are smarter now, thankfully. Thanks to advancements in both the medical and psychiatric fields, it's okay to admit that we are not perfect. As such, perfect and marriage no longer need to be in the same sentence. Up until about twenty years ago, when things were far from perfect in a marriage, couples did one of two things: One either suffered in silence or if things were really unbearable, they divorced. But today ways to save a marriage that is otherwise toxic is easier than ever.

What Causes Suffering and Can End in Divorce?

Looking back to your parents' or your grandparents' marriage, things weren't perfect, were they? Dysfunction is hardly anything new. As long as alcohol has been a part of our lives, people have consumed it, sometimes to excess. This is just one example of things that could and have frequently plagued otherwise "perfect" marriages. However, the difference between then and now is that rather than one wishing the other would improve, today ways to save a marriage are routinely implemented. Suffering no longer needs to be a part of a spouse's vernacular. Myriad options are available to couples going through something and so literally anyone can take steps to declaring, "I'm working at saving my marriage," rather than falling further into despair or consider divorce.

What Are Some of the Ways to Save a Marriage?

Thanks to more awareness about everything - be it medical or psychiatric - seeking help for individual problems is easier than ever. The stigma attached to having mental illness continues to diminish as society evolves. When individuals get better, ways to save a marriage become more possible and pessimism can be replaced with optimism.

Whether one or the both of you needs counseling, it's worth a shot to consider it an option. Maybe, it turns out, that one of you is bipolar. Let's say it's your husband and he's been self medicating, unaware that there was a problem with his mental state. In your parents' generation, he would have continued drinking to quiet his mind. Today, because you are looking for ways to save a marriage - your marriage, seeking help can be the salvation you need.

Other ways to save a marriage can include taking a trip together. Sometimes rediscovery and time away without the kids and stresses of life can do wonders and can be a quick fix.

Believe it or not, sometimes taking a break from one another can be an option in how to save a marriage. Thinking back to one spouse having as yet unresolved issues, giving him or her time to heal, decompress and "get right" mentally can allow you both to reunite and can be one of the ways to save a marriage.

Maybe in learning about how to save a marriage, you learn some unrealized things about you. Although your goal might be saving my marriage, you may just discover things about yourself you never knew.

Take Things As They Come

Given that you are not your parents or your grandparents, suffering in silence no longer needs to be an option. Whatever your problems, most are not insurmountable. Give yourselves the time, patience and space you need to find ways to find what ails you. If you are one of the tons of people who walk around obsessed with the goal of "saving my marriage," don't be your parents. Get help http://dld.bz/gethelp and then you can impart your wisdom to others about ways to save a marriage.

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