JUICE AND SQUEEZE WITH BRUME-SIP ANTHONY


LIVING IN THE NOW
Growing up as kids, we were trained with the mind-set to reason or imagine the way our lives would turn out. Things like the next School test,our career and future Profession or even our life partners(marriage and family) .Everything we did and still do, is about tomorrow.
Then, we grow up and we still think about the future; but this time in a more complex and vast way because it's all changed now ; bills, insecurities,being broke, depression, responsibilities, relationships problems, office and work. The truth is that as an adult there is always a stubborn feeling or worry that compels you to be awake late at night. But you cannot reflect on your life and not look through the retrospect of time to remember the good days of the past which influenced your life either directly or indirectly.
Personally, I remember the first time I refused a direct order from my mother (The response I got was very overwhelming ��,trust me you don't wanna know although it's a story for another day). Also a time in Secondary School that I got an F in Mathematics and all those Tom and Jerry fights with my immediate elder brother. After a while, we think about our life choices and how it has affected us today. We think about how things might have played if we had done things differently. Future and past; tomorrow and yesterday. But isn’t today what matters most?

WORRY IS A KILLER

If you need one good reason to abandon the past and future and focus on the here and now, I know that you can live longer. First of all we should be aware that worrying doesn’t solve anything, it is so bad that in an article by Marcus Gomez in True Love Magazine, his research estimate suggests that between 75 percent and 90 percent of all doctor's visits are for stress-related ailments. Worry whether it's about the past or future, is a killer.
In my typical fashion, I have pondered on this issue and asked myself a deep and provoking question - How do you stop worrying? Because the alarming rate of depression and suicidal tendencies reports are increasing daily. Young people in our society are having bad days that leads to bad thoughts that end up causing a difficult life. If you doubt this just take a walk to your street junction, and ask a young man between the ages of 17 to 45 years about his struggles and I'm sure you would sit there for hours listening to stories that are very touching . The current state of Nigeria is also not helping matters, we've been forced to live in a society in which we are not being catered for by our leaders and it's simply appalling and it plays a major role in the reasons we worry .

Failure is a bull-headed issue that leads most people into deep worries and also the dread for it(not measuring up to the expectations of the society and family). Coming from a Middle Class family, there were standards that was effaced from our heads, which launched a certain amount of pressure on my kind of person. Parents and family are usually the first set of people to mount pressure on an individual. Growing up in African homes, we were always told and required to do certain things; just because it pleases our family. Most times we do not understand these Notion and there are certain repercussions that came when we fail to meet these expectations ( If you're lost , let me give a typical example) , Every parent, according them did very well in school ( that’s obviously not true) and there is always that child like me , who is not cut out for intellectual prowess and even when your parents know that you're not interested in being a doctor , lawyer ,engineer etc., they wouldn’t hesitate to persecute you when you fail your exams and would not even inquire about your desired goals in life . The way my father was bent on me getting my degree, I never had the mind to open up to him that I wanted to be in the show business (entertainment). These things at a point got me worried, depressed and uninterested in life at a certain period in my life because I began to worry not being able to achieve my own dreams and still fail to meet my parents demands, by performing poorly in my academics , I have fallen below the laid and set standards of the family and honestly I know a lot of people have similar experiences like this, often looking at what our mates (high school mates precisely) may have achieved ,can be intimidating , it makes one to have an introspective review and often it leads to depression and worry. The truth is that we tend to assume that most people we know, have their whole life all figured out (Some people, really do have it figured out though). With the rampant use of Social Media; the major tool for communication these days, which people use to often parade fake lifestyles.
The truth is that some people know how to hide their fears and worries well than the others. Every day is a lesson and not a failure so back to the question, "How do you stop to worry?"

BRUME'S APPROACH
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We all know that we can't change the past. We think we can change the future but that is mere illusion. All we can do is plan for it, to plan the things we want to do .But plans can easily go wrong as we all have been made to be aware that we are not the only one in the entire universe, there are billions of people who also have a to-do list, everyone is moving forward at the same time. The future is certainly for everybody and it's not for you alone. Hypothetically you might plan to go to the bar after reading this article in let's say 30 minutes time and if I choose to end the write up here -you would have to go the bar earlier .But because I haven’t stopped writing ,your outing would still be a little later. You may decide to still want to go right now, but what if starts to rain. At that point the odds with your plans has changed your future. What I'm trying to say in a nutshell is that we share the future with too many other creatures, each with their own agenda .The future is a more collective brawl not an individual thing.
In fact the only thing we have power over is the now and it seems impossible sometimes, but a long series of now's make up our entire life. What really matters is your attitude to everyday life and its various challenges and triumphs - if you want to be unhappy you can be. But you can also choose to be pleased, contented and loving.
I also feel that the best way to prepare for tomorrow is to put all your energy in God, your work and career intelligently, all your enthusiasm on doing today's work superbly for today. There is always going to be one issue or problem like having a bill to pay or emergency but it is advised that you try not to have anxiety. This simply means that you should live your life without worrying about the future that might not occur, and about a past that has become history and it also means that we are not certain about the future. The only thing we truly have is now -so, what are we going to do with it? I suggest you live it and make the best out of it, Live your dreams.

TIP OF THE WEEK
Make a contribution to something or someone you know that can't repay or reward you, passionately and you will feel a self-peace and content within you. Free yourself from your own wants and greed.

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