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Osibanjo In Biblical Times - Religion - Nairaland

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Osibanjo In Biblical Times by tobechi20(m): 10:26am On Mar 14, 2018
President Buhari who led Nigeria out of financial recession was to receive the law ffrom GOD.HJe went with his private JET to collect the law ashe was instructed.he came back with a gloomy face. He knew his people would not accept one of his commandment. He was certain it was going to invoke the wrath of the people and could cost him his second term bid. He quickly sought counsel from his adviders. Mr lai mohanmed, thecountry minister of information advised him to embark on a three mointh trip abroad faking ill health and delegated the responsibility of defending the law before the senate to vice president prof osibanjo.the suggestion was well received by many. President buhari announced that the loudspeaker God used in speaking to him was so loud that it deafenes his ear. Consequently he would embark on emergency leave fo three months.

On the appointed day, acting president osibanjo presented the law to the senate.the senate president read the law to the hearing of the distinguish senators.

“thou shall have no other God before me” he read

Those in support of the adoption of that portion indicated by saying “AI” while those against said”NEY”
The former were in majority so he proceeded to the next law
“thou shall not make for thyself any graven image and bow to it”
Once again the Ais were in majority.he continued until he reached the six commandment.
“thou shall not commit adultery”
On hearing this, the whole senate bursted in chaos. It took special intervention of the sergent at arm to restore peace . ninty percent voted against while the remaining ten voted in favour.
Senator Yerima was the first to speak
“distinguish senators,variety is the spice of life.at times,I sleep with seven year old girls. Othertimes I sleep with elderly married men. I commited adultery yesterday, I will commit adultery today.my wife has not complained. She ia happy, I am happy everyone is happy so why is GOD SAD?
“your wife is not happy, she is crying deep inside. She has been praying to God to change your reckless livestyle.the under age girls you sleep with could contact VVF.you could inflict STD on your wife too.” The professor of law replied

Senator Dino Melaye, the controversial senator was the next in line
“what is God business with what I do in the bedroom. I hope he did not install a hidden camera to watch us when we are naked. He should respect our right to privacy.”

“God created you in his image. Your body is his temple. He has every right to intrude in your privacy the same way you intrude in your childs privacy. You are like a child to him.he owns you “

Senator Akpabio spoke last
“if one plate of meat doesn’t satisfy me, I can go outside and eat an extra plate. I think there are more presing need in the countrylike the biafran agitation and killing of Fulani herds men and God is more concerned with how I use my rod. I suggest we should strip GOD off his power. He should focus on installing new pope, general overseer and church leaders.
Finally,it was decided that GOD SHOULD BEsummoned to appear before the house of assembly in two weaks time. He must wear his Godly uniform. Prof Osibanjo objected that GOD doesn’t have a definite address and so couldn’t have his summon letters delivered to him. Senate president Saraki objected directing the professor to deliver the letter to God in prayers. The session came to an end
Re: Osibanjo In Biblical Times by Sapnaprem(f): 10:33am On Mar 14, 2018
i no know say our VP don change name. FTC
Re: Osibanjo In Biblical Times by tobechi20(m): 5:29pm On Mar 14, 2018
Sapnaprem:
i no know say our VP don change name. FTC

how
Re: Osibanjo In Biblical Times by Sapnaprem(f): 7:57am On Mar 15, 2018
the topic
tobechi20:


how

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