For several years, I felt bad about the idea of going for such option. Maybe because I'm too young or afraid of being judged badly in the neighborhood! I read on the Internet that at my age, this modesty is understandable. But all that is over now.
My cousin once told me these words of encouragement "You do not have to worry, no one will notice, not even the seller will pay attention."
Shame kept me tied up too long. Tomorrow I'll do it, at 12:00 precisely, I told myself.
I left home in search of a shop in the neighboring area, because everyone in my area knows each other. I could meet my mother’s friend, who would tell her everything.
On D-Day, I wore my face cap, hoping to give myself confidence, then went out. So I found myself alone on that fateful morning, trembling with shame, in front of the shop. Right next to me, two old women were discussing as they went on with their daily activity.
I recovered my last ounce of courage and advanced discreetly. Aureoles of sweat dripping under my arms. Yet, I wore the latest anti-perspirant from Nivéa Beauty. "More false advertising!" I said to myself.
The shopkeeper, was gnawing his rosary.
I stood right in front of him. I waved to him to approach, then whispered what I wanted. He looked at me with a look full of disgust and told me in a dry tone: “#300”.
The women discussing beside me were now gazing at me, and whispering to each other.
I was trembling like a leaf, I brought out the money and handed it to him.
He handed me the package and almost snatched the #500 note from my hands.
I could not wait to collect my change. I hid the object in my pocket, pulled my cap on my face hoping only one thing: not to be recognized ...
Then I engulfed in the small discrete street that will lead me directly home. I overtook a small group of drunkards. Sitting on the terrace of a bar, they turn a goblet of palm wine, mixing laughter and galleys. In the shade of a banana tree, I saw a woman pounding in an old mortar.
At the shelter behind his shutters, my neighbor smiled at me; Embarrassed, I accelerated my pace.
Finally, I arrived at the family apartment, exhausted and covered with sweat. Without a sound, for fear of attracting the attention of my parents, I went straight to my room. The pictures of my brothers and sisters seems to look at me with disapproval from the wall where they were hung. I hurriedly hid my precious package under the mattress.
That was it, I defeated the taboo… I bought a C*ND*M
Source:
https://www.amebobabe.com/2018/05/defeated-shame-complete-story.html