Let's begin by talking about Domestic Abuse - how it is regarded and dealt with in our culture. As a psych intern I was taught that we must report Child Abuse, Elder Abuse, a credible threat by one individual to physically harm another or a credible threat by an individual to physically harm him or herself. So we do protect children, elders and people who are about to be harmed. However, unless a child was present during the time it was occurring, we are not allowed to report domestic abuse - only the parties involved can do that.

What that means for me as a clinician is that I can defend an adult individual who is (possibly) about to be physically harmed, but I cannot defend an adult individual who actually was physically harmed. The logic here is that that individual should be able to stand up for him or herself. But a lot of the times that is simply not the case; and the reason it is not the case is that the individual may fear retribution, may be attempting to protect their partner or children, or may be so psychologically enmeshed that they don't have the wherewithal to stand up for themselves. In the case of men who are abused, there is the additional factor of shame and not believing that anyone else will take their situation seriously.

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