cococandy:
I would encourage that because we do it and it works for us. We didn’t start out that way but now that we do, there’s obviously a difference.


Whatever you share, make sure it’s reciprocated otherwise then it’s controlling and never romantic.
If you have access to her emails, make sure she has access to your emails. If you have the passwords to all her social media, she has to have the passwords to all of yours as well. I hope you guys enjoy your marriage

@bold: 100% on point.

I am surprised when I tell peeps that I need to discuss any expense with my husband or involve him in everything no matter how mundane and they look at me like I am strange or 'in bondage' or not 'free'.

I believe the reciprocity makes the difference.

@OP: First step is to marry someone like you. Sadly, some women will take you for granted if you are open towards them.

In an ideal marriage based on love, trust and commitment.

Not a Nigerian marriage.
The village go hear o!

Yea if one party does something and the other doesn’t reciprocate it’s makes a HUGE difference.

bukatyne:


@bold: 100% on point.

I am surprised when I tell peeps that I need to discuss any expense with my husband or involve him in everything no matter how mundane and they look at me like I am strange or 'in bondage' or not 'free'.

I believe the reciprocity makes the difference.

@OP: First step is to marry someone like you. Sadly, some women will take you for granted if you are open towards them.

9japrof:
I stand for 100 percent transperancy but it depends on who's at the other end. Some can't just handle the truth.


So make sure your woman can handle the truth and is also reciprocating same else it's a recipe for disaster

If the “truth” is going to be hurtful, then it’s best to avoid it rather than hide it or expect them accept it because you were transparent with it.

LewsTherin:
I don't think leaving yourself open to your wife is a bad idea. It does depend on the wife though. You know your woman and only you can say...at least, I hope you know your woman and not believe she is what you WANT her to be.

I am very open to my Lady and vice versa. My phone diverts to hers if it's switched off. Her finger print is registered on my device and vice versa. She knows the pin ms to my debit cards. She knows the passwords to my various accounts and emails. But she doesn't go out of her way to snoop, to track or whatever.

We'll be 7 years married this month after dating long distance for 8 years. So we've been together for 15 years and contrary to the crowd of pessimists on Nairaland, I am enjoying my marriage still.

I'm not saying there are no and have not been any challanges but nothing that has threatened our relationship in ANY way.

Wow...May u nd ur family always b happy,Godbless u both.. Feeling so happy reading dis ur comment

LewsTherin:
I don't think leaving yourself open to your wife is a bad idea. It does depend on the wife though. You know your woman and only you can say...at least, I hope you know your woman and not believe she is what you WANT her to be.

I am very open to my Lady and vice versa. My phone diverts to hers if it's switched off. Her finger print is registered on my device and vice versa. She knows the pin ms to my debit cards. She knows the passwords to my various accounts and emails. But she doesn't go out of her way to snoop, to track or whatever.

We'll be 7 years married this month after dating long distance for 8 years. So we've been together for 15 years and contrary to the crowd of pessimists on Nairaland, I am enjoying my marriage still.

I'm not saying there are no and have not been any challanges but nothing that has threatened our relationship in ANY way.

Wow...May u nd ur family always b happy,Godbless u both.. Feeling so happy reading dis ur comment

cococandy:

If the “truth” is going to be hurtful, then it’s best to avoid it rather than hide it or expect them accept it because you were transparent with it.

Yeah, during courtship and marriage, avoid stuffs that could hurt your partner if he/she knows, but what about those that happened prior to he/she knowing you, that's the angle am commenting on, what do you say

9japrof:



Yeah, during courtship and marriage, avoid stuffs that could hurt your partner if he/she knows, but what about those that happened prior to he/she knowing you, that's the angle am commenting on, what do you say

If it happened before, then it’s past. It may not be necessary to bring them up unless they have the potential to impact the marriage (not emotionally) but financially, health or physically.

That shouldn’t prevent openness henceforth in the marriage except those things aren’t really in the past.

Yes it's okay

Ofcourse, 101% transparency is the best...

I can't imagine a marriage where I will take permission before accessing or using his stuffs.. or where i dont have details of his finances......will be sickening

I don't think you'll have anything to hide if both of you are in love and in sync...

Very okay.

My girlfriend nah CIA oooh as in ehhhnn the girl snoop pass snoop dog ...... but she is a good girl