This has caused a lot of ripples in the family. We never knew that the man my cousin sister got married to two years back already had 5 children, two of which are already grown up and senior secondary school. The man had been previously married to two woman who have separated from him.

My sister gave birth to a bouncing baby girl last year.

The mother of my cousin was aware of this development even before the marriage, but kept it away from the girl's father and other family members.

The father got to know recently and discovered that his wife was aware for long. Now, the man is provoked, threatening to divorce his own wife for Keeping something of this nature from him, but the woman is pleading and has sent several emissaries to plead with the husband to forgive her and the daughter, whom the father had already equally threatened to disown.

Even me, her brother, I am pained by the action of my sister, a pretty and intelligent girl. Is it because of love or was she desperate because of her age then to get married to a man who already had older women as wives and already had 5 children?

This has caused a lot of confusion and mind game in the entire family.

The entire family has however scheduled a family meeting to meet with the girl's father and mother to deal with the issues amicably.

At the point of this writeup, the father of the girl is in a highly vexed mood.

Me, as a senior cousin to the girl, certainly i would be at the meeting, but I don't really know the position to take, hence I need advice on how to placate the father and other aggrieved family members, since it's choice and she already taken the decision and even produced a child.

Her choice her life

ednut1:
Her choice her life

I hope you read through before your comment?

nickxtra:
I hope you read through before your comment?

yes i read it. Avoid the meeting as it wont add any value to ur life. Ur cousin has made her choice and if it backfires she bears it

what's your own? she decided, as person lay bed, na so he go lie on top. as for the mama and the papa, wahala no dey. na for the papa to dey careful.
wish her the best becuase if it fails the regrets from both the mama and her will be much

She marry na problem she no marry na problem, jst tell yr family members i hv work for them.

mankettle:
what's your own? she decided, as person lay bed, na so he go lie on top. as for the mama and the papa, wahala no dey. na for the papa to dey careful.
wish her the best becuase if it fails the regrets from both the mama and her will be much

Good

Chai! Some people really do know how not to mind their businesses o! Hian! Is it your marriage? Whew!

Exactly how people fail exams.
Reading without understanding!

Op... is asking for advice regarding the rift between his sister and the husband not about the young girls marriage.

Op.. i hope someone comes in to help.
Goodluck.

Why are u telling us all these?

ihustler:
Why are u telling us all these?

I can see you are still a kid.

...waka pass jare

PIPnator:
Exactly how people fail exams.
Reading without understanding!

Op... is asking for advice regarding the rift between his sister and the husband not about the young girls marriage.

Op.. i hope someone comes in to help.
Goodluck.

How to settle the rift between the my cousin's mother and the dad on one hand and the lady with the dad on the other hand. On my own, I am not affected in anyway by the marriage, but just to ensure peace reigns among the lady's parents and in the entire family, particularly as such vital background information was concealed from the father.

Lol, he pain am!

Busybody!!

nickxtra:
I can see you are still a kid.

...waka pass jare

ihustler:
Lol, he pain am!

Busybody!!

My sister, my blood. Aproko go finish u

Nickxtra

go to the father of your sister and ask him some questions

1. Has the said husband or the daughter come to beg him for money?

2. Has the man failed to provide for the wife and children as he has done for his grown children?

3. Did the daughter complain about the husband to him the father about the past EXs of the husband?

4. Is he willing to marry his own blood daughter when he scatter the whole affair.

if his answer is no, tell him what has been done has been done the daughter will never seize to be his blood whatever he says or does won't change that.

The advice I would give anyone in such situation is to call the husband and let him know you are not happy about what happened but the deed has been done. He should make necessary agreement and show evidence of divorce of the 2 women and provide registry marriage to protect his daughter in future circumstances, he should in no way ask the man to cutoff his ties with his EX children.

Then he should make arrangements to protect the daughter by providing a solid source of income if he can and advice to always put her children first in everything she does. Funding 6 children in Nigeria today isn't an easy work for any man.

nurey:
Nickxtra

go to the father of your sister and ask him some questions

1. Has the said husband or the daughter come to beg him for money?

2. Has the man failed to provide for the wife and children as he has done for his grown children?

3. Did the daughter complain about the husband to him the father about the past EXs of the husband?

4. Is he willing to marry his own blood daughter when he scatter the whole affair.

if his answer is no, tell him what has been done has been done the daughter will never seize to be his blood whatever he says or does won't change that.

The advice I would give anyone in such situation is to call the husband and let him know you are not happy about what happened but the deed has been done. He should make necessary agreement and show evidence of divorce of the 2 women and provide registry marriage to protect his daughter in future circumstances, he should in no way ask the man to cutoff his ties with his EX children.

Then he should make arrangements to protect the daughter by providing a solid source of income if he can and advice to always put her children first in everything she does. Funding 6 children in Nigeria today isn't an easy work for any man.

God bless you for this comment. Your parents born you well unlike that "yam" head

nickxtra:
My sister, my blood. Aproko go finish u

For you to be asking for advice from nairaland shows you are still a kid and shouldn't be at that meeting. Mature people will know what to say, they don't need advice from kids and faceless people to solve family problems.

zed7:

For you to be asking for advice from nairaland shows you are still a kid and shouldn't be at that meeting. Mature people will know what to say, they don't need advice from kids and faceless people to solve family problems.

Am no Island, Oga aproko