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R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by crackhaus: 10:05pm On Jan 13, 2019
safarigirl:
according to the law in America, the age of consent is 18.

You know, America, where someone like you would have lost his day job for asking these idiotic questions on social media, but thank your God that you live in a shithole like Nigeria..... I would advise you don't attempt to travel to any lawful country anytime soon smiley
It's actually 16 in most of the states.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by safarigirl(f): 10:09pm On Jan 13, 2019
crackhaus:

It's actually 16 in most of the states.
noted.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by Nobody: 10:15pm On Jan 13, 2019
You are talking of a society where food is second to sex?

I wonder if the average American girl even clocks thirteen before they become sexually active.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by 1Sharon(f): 10:28pm On Jan 13, 2019
5thElement:
You are talking of a society where food is second to sex?

I wonder if the average American girl even clocks thirteen before they become sexually active.
w

Sex is a big thing in Nigeria too, it's just that ppl are very hypocritical about it undecided

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Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 10:32pm On Jan 13, 2019
safarigirl:
according to the law in America, the age of consent is 18.

You know, America, where someone like you would have lost his day job for asking these idiotic questions on social media, but thank your God that you live in a shithole like Nigeria..... I would advise you don't attempt to travel to any lawful country anytime soon smiley
yep the law in America. The land of milk and honey where individuals crave each others butthole, yea that america that suddenly is law or right anf wrong, please spare me.

But was your thread about America? Now please tell me, what's the age of consent in Nigeria? Just so you know, not everybody is raved about travelling abroad.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by Nobody: 10:38pm On Jan 13, 2019
1Sharon:
w

Sex is a big thing in Nigeria too, it's just that ppl are very hypocritical about it undecided

Maybe that's the difference. Sex is still a taboo topic of discussion in most Nigerian household, even if all the unmarried teenage girls in the family are no longer virgins.

I won't be surprised if the parents of the girls at the time knew their girls were sleeping with R Kelly.

I mean, we might be talking of parents who won't mind a 3some with their daughter and R Kelly.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 10:39pm On Jan 13, 2019
safarigirl:

You have adopted the thought process of every paedophile apologist in the world, as expected. Sometimes, it is advisable to hold an element of surprise. I could easily tell where you were going with this and it is truly sad that you can be so predictable.


Sadly, you will possibly end up being the father of a little girl some day, because of her exposure in a modern world, she will know a lot of sexual matters. Would you be pleased if an ADULT in your neighbourhood, who should KNOW BETTER takes advantage of the fact that your 13-year old daughter knows of sex, to have sex with her? These days, 8-year old girls know of sex, should 25-year old men sleep with 8-year olds because they KNOW OF sex?


Let me advise you now, no court of law will care if a child "knows of sex", that a child knows something, does not mean an adult should take advantage and act on them. There are millions of adult women you can have sex with, without tainting what is left of a child's innocence.


Do you think a 30-year old woman should be having sex with a 14-year old boy? What if R-Kelly had sex with 13-year old boys, would your opinion differ?

If kids and adults were held on the same level of accountability, then there would be no need for the law to keep kids under the care of an adult. The entire point of being an adult, is to be accountable, be RESPONSIBLE, not to blame a child for your own inability to do an ADULT thing.


PS: Yes, he RAPED them. Sex with a minor is classified as RAPE. Do you know why? Because Rape is defined as penetration WITHOUT Consent, and according to the law, a minor is INCAPABLE of providing CONSENT.
darn! Such epistle. You should take comfort in the fact that i didn't read a damn of what you wrote up there.

Please know this, action speak louder than words, but with individuals like yourself, words speak louder than actions. What a shame.

You should know, last year, I would have enjoyed going back and forth with you, but not this year as I'm tired of people like you who are way too myopic to know people get sent to jail by their actions, not words.

Here you're even talking about a person losing his job just because he asked a question. Talk about someone being idiotic.

Perish the thought.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 10:41pm On Jan 13, 2019
crackhaus:

It's actually 16 in most of the states.
she's oblivious to this but chose to flare her one sided opinions down and up.

See how she was throwing assumptions when I asked her how old were the girls R.Kelly had sex with.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 10:43pm On Jan 13, 2019
thorpido:
Many of them were 13,14 and 15.That's below the age of consent.
thank you, wish I could say the same for someone who love making love to assumptions the way a whore_ loves making love to her money.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by crackhaus: 10:53pm On Jan 13, 2019
safarigirl:
Hello guys,

So, the last couple of weeks have been filled with social media outrage at the actions of R-Kelly, which were made known via the documentary 'Surviving R-Kelly' which details his molestation of several underaged girls, over the course of decades.

As expected, most of the outrage has been directed at R-Kelly, but the purpose of this write-up is not so much on the perpetrator, but the other adults who were just as complacent in his actions as he was; the parents.

These girls were at R-Kelly's house, how did they get there? Whose parents allowed them visit a grown man's house? Some of these girls were brought to his concerts by their parents and their parents let them go backstage with him, unattended to. Through the period he molested them, did their parents have no inkling what was going on with their young daughters or did they just turn a blind eye? Aaliyah went on tour with R-Kelly at 15, who allowed it? Who was the adult in her life that should have stopped this act?

What kind of parents were they?

What kind of parents are we?

What kind of parent are you?

What is your role in your young child's life?

It is very easy, especially in today's world, to lose track of our kids, to lose track of their progress, to turn a blind eye to their woes, to their struggles, to ignore their silent cries for help. Parents are far too occupied with making money, they want a better life for the child at an adult life, but in the process of doing this, you sacrifice their growth as children, you sacrifice the most important years of their lives; the formative years. And you think all is well, because they are being fed..... But what are your kids being fed?

You give them physical food, but what are they being fed mentally, psychologically, spiritually? Are you up to date on the current happenings in the lives of your kids? Do you know their close friends? Do you know where they go to hang out? Do you know who they talk to? Do you know what they get up to when they are not with you?


Some people are so obsessed with making that cash, they send their kids off to live with strangers. Some kids are in boarding school for six straight years and spend at most, a month or two with their parents in a year. Who is spending 10 months with your child? What are they feeding your kid? What ideals do your kids have?

Some are physically present, but mentally absent. You don't gist with your child, but he or she comfortably spends long hours gisting with one uncle or aunty in the neighborhood. What is that uncle or aunty telling your child? Are you even concerned about what he is learning?


Even more, what odd things as a parent have you noticed with your kid? Are they using the wrong vocabulary? Do they have advanced opinions on life that rub you off the wrong way? Are they watching the wrong things? And how do they interprete the things they watch?

Can your child meet you to discuss sensitive topics or do you just refer them to a religious book when they ask you or send them off to another person? What have you taught your kid, whether male or female, about concepts like 'consent' 'respect' 'boundaries'?

What are the values you instill in your kids? Do you teach them to respect themselves and others? Or do you teach them to fear their elders? Do you teach them to put themselves first, love themselves, protect themselves? Do you teach them to only respect those who deserve to be respected? Have you made your child vulnerable by telling them adults can do no wrong? Have you convinced your child that if an aunty or uncle or any adult touches them inappropriately, it is their fault?


Have you told your child they are beautiful, intelligent, precious, amazing? What are you telling your kids and what are you setting them up for?


R-Kelly is a paedophile, a cradlerobber, am immoral man, but he had enablers. He had careless parents who let their kids stray, parents who sacrificed their kids on an altar of fame and fortune.


What kind of parent are you?
Good admonition to parents whose influence cannot be over-emphasized. However, some of these girls did a lot of the things they did even when their parents tried to get them out.

I've been watching a lot of the video clips and interviews related to these alleged abuses, I'm still not done. If you are to form opinions based on just the docu-series on Lifetime, R.kelly seems guilty as hell but going back through different youtube clips from various sources, one begins to gain a broader perspective in the sense that some of these women knew and 100% consented to whatever transpired.
There was one clip where the girl's mother held a small protest against Kelly and insisting he should free her daughter from his brainwashing and let her go. Well guess what, the girl was in a next clip on camera with her face clearly showing replying her mother and saying she was not brainwashed (as a matter of fact, she didn't want to leave R.kelly's house anytime soon).

Now just imagine this same girl twenty years time posing for the camera claiming she was abused and was forced to do all she did when she was 16.
Like I noted before, gaining a broader perspective is important in situations like this.
These women who are now coming out are all in their 30's, most of them are getting paid for granting these interviews, one even wrote a book and during the interview (saw a clip of this too), she was promoting this book right after putting on a sad face detailing how R.kelly abused her. Like seriously? cheesy

There are so many elements to be taken into consideration when things like this come up - generalizations cannot be made, blames cannot be subjective. If you have an idea how most of these performers and artistes live, you'd realize that they never have a shortage of women. They go for a show and girls are either waiting for them in their hotel rooms or leaving the venue with them in groups, I tell you this from first-hand experience.
Ask yourself this question, do you think these artistes go around asking for the age and identity cards of these women before having group sex with them? Absolutely not.

The man R.kelly could very well be guilty of everything that he has been accused of, I truly don't care... This however doesn't mean one should take every word and accusation at face value. He has been taken to court before and a jury found him 'not guilty' just on the consensus that they couldn't verify the age of the girl shown in the video evidence. To be honest, if there was any case to be made against his person, I personally think the women ought to be using the courts instead of granting interviews.

Richard Quest asked the producers of Lifetime's "Surviving R.kelly", why are you using the media for something the courts should very well be taking care of?
They rambled...

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Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 11:21pm On Jan 13, 2019
crackhaus:

Good admonition to parents whose influence cannot be over-emphasized. However, some of these girls did a lot of the things they did even when their parents tried to get them out.

I've been watching a lot of the video clips and interviews related to these alleged abuses, I'm still not done. If you are to form opinions based on just the docu-series on Lifetime, R.kelly seems guilty as hell but going back through different youtube clips from various sources, one begins to gain a broader perspective in the sense that some of these women knew and 100% consented to whatever transpired.
There was one clip where the girl's mother held a small protest against Kelly and insisting he should free her daughter from his brainwashing and let her go. Well guess what, the girl was in a next clip on camera with her face clearly showing replying her mother and saying she was not brainwashed (as a matter of fact, she didn't want to leave R.kelly's house anytime soon).

Now just imagine this same girl twenty years time posing for the camera claiming she was abused and was forced to do all she did when she was 16.
Like I noted before, gaining a broader perspective is important in situations like this.
These women who are now coming out are all in their 30's, most of them are getting paid for granting these interviews, one even wrote a book and during the interview (saw a clip of this too), she was promoting this book right after putting on a sad face detailing how R.kelly abused her. Like seriously? cheesy

There are so many elements to be taken into consideration when things like this come up - generalizations cannot be made, blames cannot be subjective. If you have an idea how most of these performers and artistes live, you'd realize that they never have a shortage of women. They go for a show and girls are either waiting for them in their hotel rooms or leaving the venue with them in groups, I tell you this from first-hand experience.
Ask yourself this question, do you think these artistes go around asking for the age and identity cards of these women before having group sex with them? Absolutely not.

The man R.kelly could very well be guilty of everything that he has been accused of, I truly don't care... This however doesn't mean one should take every word and accusation at face value. He has been taken to court before and a jury found him 'not guilty' just on the consensus that they couldn't verify the age of the girl shown in the video evidence. To be honest, if there was any case to be made against his person, I personally think the women ought to be using the courts instead of granting interviews.

Richard Quest asked the producers of Lifetime's "Surviving R.kelly", why are you using the media for something the courts should very well be taking care of?
They rambled...
Happy New Year, Crackhaus.

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Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by crackhaus: 11:35pm On Jan 13, 2019
AHCB:
Happy New Year, Crackhaus.
Happy New Year, my brother.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 11:41pm On Jan 13, 2019
crackhaus:

Happy New Year, my brother.
thanks. Your earlier post was what I actually wanted to point out to that lass but she showed just how thick she is by saying if I was in America I'd lose my job for asking such 'idiotic' question. Would have insulted the living day light out of her but I've discovered some girls/women here need serious help and I'm in no position to help them, so why bother.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by crackhaus: 12:01am On Jan 14, 2019
AHCB:
thanks. Your earlier post was what I actually wanted to point out to that lass but she showed just how thick she is by saying if I was in America I'd lose my job for asking such 'idiotic' question. Would have insulted the living day light out of her but I've discovered some girls/women here need serious help and I'm in no position to help them, so why bother.
Forgive her excesses. cheesy

1 Like

Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by AHCB: 3:28am On Jan 14, 2019
crackhaus:

Forgive her excesses. cheesy
Lol. Already did. cheesy
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by Nobody: 2:40pm On Jan 14, 2019
AHCB:
she's oblivious to this but chose to flare her one sided opinions down and up.

See how she was throwing assumptions when I asked her how old were the girls R.Kelly had sex with.

Aliyah was 14 and the girl in the sex tape was 14 as well. He even had one of his guards make a fake ID for Aaliyah at 15 saying she was 18 which they used in getting married.

I blame everyone involved in this. R-kelly, The Girls parents and the Adults around working for Kelly who actually saw these things but didn't raise any alarm whatsoever as at then. Imagine his former music teacher coming out to say now that R-Kelly used to hang around the high school to pick up girls and she would confront him and tell him not to give her that "Bullish"
One parent actually went to the police but I think she was turned back because the age of consent in that state was 17, so there was nothing they could do really as the girl went there willingly and the sex was Consensual.

2 Likes

Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by safarigirl(f): 3:09pm On Jan 14, 2019
crackhaus:

Good admonition to parents whose influence cannot be over-emphasized. However, some of these girls did a lot of the things they did even when their parents tried to get them out.

I've been watching a lot of the video clips and interviews related to these alleged abuses, I'm still not done. If you are to form opinions based on just the docu-series on Lifetime, R.kelly seems guilty as hell but going back through different youtube clips from various sources, one begins to gain a broader perspective in the sense that some of these women knew and 100% consented to whatever transpired.
There was one clip where the girl's mother held a small protest against Kelly and insisting he should free her daughter from his brainwashing and let her go. Well guess what, the girl was in a next clip on camera with her face clearly showing replying her mother and saying she was not brainwashed (as a matter of fact, she didn't want to leave R.kelly's house anytime soon).

Now just imagine this same girl twenty years time posing for the camera claiming she was abused and was forced to do all she did when she was 16.
Like I noted before, gaining a broader perspective is important in situations like this.
These women who are now coming out are all in their 30's, most of them are getting paid for granting these interviews, one even wrote a book and during the interview (saw a clip of this too), she was promoting this book right after putting on a sad face detailing how R.kelly abused her. Like seriously? cheesy

There are so many elements to be taken into consideration when things like this come up - generalizations cannot be made, blames cannot be subjective. If you have an idea how most of these performers and artistes live, you'd realize that they never have a shortage of women. They go for a show and girls are either waiting for them in their hotel rooms or leaving the venue with them in groups, I tell you this from first-hand experience.
Ask yourself this question, do you think these artistes go around asking for the age and identity cards of these women before having group sex with them? Absolutely not.

The man R.kelly could very well be guilty of everything that he has been accused of, I truly don't care... This however doesn't mean one should take every word and accusation at face value. He has been taken to court before and a jury found him 'not guilty' just on the consensus that they couldn't verify the age of the girl shown in the video evidence. To be honest, if there was any case to be made against his person, I personally think the women ought to be using the courts instead of granting interviews.

Richard Quest asked the producers of Lifetime's "Surviving R.kelly", why are you using the media for something the courts should very well be taking care of?
They rambled...


I watched a video where one of the girls was interviewed. She was 14 as at the time she was with R-Kelly and when she was asked why she didn'y report the matter, she said she thought she could save him and she was "in love"....the idea was ridiculous, but it is not far-fetched that a child would fall "in love" with the artiste that is R-Kelly.


A Sunderland player was recently jailed for having sex with an underage girl. The court did not care whether he asked for her ID or not, they assumed he should have because ignorance is not an excuse in the court of law.

But you see, we have greatly digressed from the topic. As I said, I did not create this topic because of R-Kelly, nor did I create it because of the foolishness of the girls or naivete. Those are other topics on their own

The purpose of this thread is to focus on parents position in the lives of their kids. Forget R-Kelly, more kids are being molested in Nigeria than in America most likely, but the culture of silence is another thing that must be tackled. This thread is to address parents and their absence in the lives of their kids, and R-Kelly or not, attempts or not, the point should not be lost .


This thread is not about R-Kelly. It is about Nigerian parents learning from the mistakes of some of those parents in the R-Kelly's docu-series.



So, Mr. AHCB, do not turn the topic to "How old were they" because as I said in the original post, this thread is about parents and their roles. Some of those girls would not have ended up with R-Kelly if they had attentive parents, that is a FACT, after all, weren't there teenage girls who came across him and didn't end up in his house or bed? And yes, you could lose your job for asking such a question if you were in America, people have lost their jobs for less.....Thank God you are in Nigeria


PS: I would never generalise. For every general rule, there are exceptions, but it should not negate the rule.

3 Likes

Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by safarigirl(f): 3:10pm On Jan 14, 2019
crackhaus:

Forgive her excesses. cheesy
don't apologise on my behal, please smiley
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by 12inchess: 11:58am On Feb 13, 2019
Seun:
That happens, but not in this case. Allegations of R Kelly’s sexual predation started at the very beginning of his career, yet he went on to have a successful musical career, which allowed him to pay off his poor and vulnerable accusers. But now, his #TimesUp.
His time is not up. What this situation has thought me is that the vulnerable have no hope other than God in this world that we live in.
Re: R-kelly Saga And The Role Of Good Parenting by DexterousOne(m): 1:23pm On Feb 20, 2019
deleo16:
Morals and values is dead in this age especially with Western culture that's what is happen now . I remember vividly when bill Clinton came to Nigeria saying he nigerians should keep their culture and not copy the western culture. identity crisis is at peak among our youths especially divorce is on the increase ,rape , paledophile,hard drugs e.tc I am not surprised,this foreign culture is eating deep in Nigeria good write up Op

Whether western or African culture

Our societies in general are messed up!

African cultyre is not any better.

It's for one to train his kids with the RIGHY MORALS
Whether you are in a western or African setting

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