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Drogba (written in pidgin English) - Literature - Nairaland

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Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 11:20am On Jan 13, 2019
"Things dey happen for Jamaica."
(Inspired by a true life story)

Available on Okadabooks.com and smashwords.com

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Re: Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 11:22am On Jan 13, 2019

Jamaica na one kind place wey nobody dey enter anyhow. Jamaica no be ghetto for some people eyes but for my own eyes na confirm ghetto him be. My name na Drogba as my guys and people for area dey call me. Drogba no be the name my palle and malle give me oooh, na just title wey dem guys especially my close padi walex and Jojo take honour me for area. I be tallinus come black join with tattoos of dem girls name wey I don polongo for my body. My name na Drobga and my occupation na to rape and run things, even dem police sef dey shake when dem see my shadow.

My palle don pai but my malle, granmalle, and my little sister, Charity still dey alive. I be get another sister wey her name be Titi, but dem kill am for where we dey live before and na because of her death na him make us change house. I be good boy before and I be graduate too but na the nature of my sister death make me dey as I be now. Make I quick yarn wetin I wan yarn.

The day me and my family enter Jamaica, na that day I turn bad boy. The house wey we rent no dey far from the street where my Granmalle dey stay. Even though I be bad boy, I no dey use my family play at all. E no take me much time before I turn that area upside down. The area wey dey peaceful before come turn to place where young girls no fit waka freely, area wey trouble dey boil every day. Na me cause am, na me be the pioneer and originator of the new face of coal street. Na me organize one big bar for the area wey dem guys and babes dey smoke, drink, and dance. I even extend the business to ashawo joint. Na me name the bar Jamaica and na the name wey dem dey use call coal street be that.

My Malle sef start one pelenge business in front of house, she dey sell Akamu and moi-moi for morning, and akara and bread for night. I make sure sey my sister dey go school and even attend extra lesson sef.

Every morning after I don wake up, before I comot go huzzle, I dey make sure sey I go visit my granmalle, na my custom be that.

As I reach my Granmalle place for one morning like that, before I enter her house, I come dey observe small small girls dem wey don grow kutupe and brurere, because me I no dey tire dey see those kind things, na those things dey give me inspiration sef. Anyway shaa, as I enter Granmalle parlour, naso I see am lie down for chair dey cry, I even think sey Granmalle time don expire, as I come shift small reach her front, naso she hold my shirt come give me one dirty slap, naso I come dey see double oooh, e come be like sey Iyanya dey perform kukere for my head.

" Joshua, what is wrong with you, do you want to kill me and your mother?" for my mind, I think sey Granmalle don start her usual stunt, as she don old naa, until she come strong face for me, na that time I come no sey she dey serious.

"Na wetin Drogba do oooh?" mesef strong face give am.

"Speak English. Joshua I have warned you severally to stop speaking pidgin English when you are with me."

"Haha Granmalle pidgin English no be English too? English na for dem oyinbo, Pidgin English na our own version. Na Pidgin English suppose be our National Language sef." As Granmalle wan give me another slap, na him I come dodge am ooh. Naso she dey do everytime wey I go her place, she no dey make me rest, naso she go dey preach come dey speak one kind grammar wey no dey work.

"Joshua, please I beg you in the name of God, turn a new leaf, you weren't like this before; you were such a sweet boy, what happen to you? Your mother reported you to me that you forced yourself on another girl. Please Joshua go back to the good boy you were before."

"Na the girl gree give me naaa, no be sey I rape am. You know sey I no dey cause trouble, if person find my own trouble I go spoil ground oooh. And point of correction, my name no be Joshua, I be Drogba, Joshua don die tey tey."

"I have said my own, turn a new leaf before it’s too late. You are a graduate, go and get a good job for yourself please." After Granmalle finish her Grammar, as she no gree give me food chop naso I leave am go street go hustle. The thing wey even surprise me be sey people no me wella for the area, na even the chikalas sef dey follow me for back.

As I enter Jamaica, naso I see one fine chikala hang for one corner outside the bar. Me don know sey she be fresh babe for area as I never see am before. As a sharp guy wey no dey carry last, na him I come draw her closer, I be wan kiss am sef because me believe sey any chikala wey stand outside Jamaica bar na ashawo. The babe no gree ooh, she come push me, but I grab am back.

"Who you be?" I ask am.

"Please leave me...help me please." Naso the babe dey scream oooh. She no no who I be for area, and she no no sey nobody go answer am.

"Na wetin be your name...I sey wetin be your name?" I shout for am.

"Joyce, my name is Joyce." Naso the girl dey shake ooh, dey cry like pikin wey never chop.

"E bi like sey you no no me."

"I don't know you please, let me go."

"Make I let you go? Me I no dey carry my eyes comot from fine things ooh. My name na Drogba and my occupation na to rape. I no dey kill person, but I dey give person belle, so make you cooperate."

"Please let me go, I'm only waiting for my boyfriend here, please let me go." As I no like the story wey she dey yarn, naso I grab her hands tight come drag am inside. Dem people wey dey inside dey look us, dem just dey hail me as dem don no wetin I wan do. I come even use the opportunity show am the tattoo of names of chikalas wey I don polongo for my body. The babe just dey shiver come dey beg me sey make I leave am sey na her boyfriend tell am make she wait for am for Jamaica. I be wan pity am before but the babe too fine pass make I leave am. Na so I carry her like bag of garri enter room.

Na only the babe ring tone dem just dey hear for bar, her voice come dey high, dey low like Nepa light. Even when her Bobo rush enter, himself dey feel the voice as e dey draw like ogbono. Me sef I no sey I be bad boy because as the girl fine reach naso my Moringa perform.

"oya oya I don finish wear your cloth joo." Naso I yarn am after I be don go five rounds ontop am. Joyce no come fit waka well oooh, sote I come dey pity am. Naso her Bobo come rush carry am, him come even dey warn me sey I go regret wetin I do him babe.

"How dare you force yourself on my woman, you have done your worst today Drogba, this time around you won't escape the law." Naso the Bobo threaten me oooh.

"Na who tell you sey I rape am...na she gree give me and I collect am." Naso joyce just dey para for me sey I dey lie. She even swear give me and I swear for am back. Her Bobo be tell am sey make dem meet for "Walica", Walica na one new restaurant wey dem open for one street wey dey close to us. Joyce be no hear her Bobo well oooh, she be think sey na Jamaica him talk.

Bobo still threaten me again ooo come talk sey him go use police catch me. Bobo and Joyce go carry police come as he talk am. As dem police come see sey na me dey wan arrest, na him dem come dey shake come run go back. Joyce and her Bobo follow dem ooo but before dem go, Joyce yarn me lots of things wey scatter my head, her Bobo sef threaten me join sey him go deal with me...

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Re: Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 9:39am On Jan 14, 2019
Re: Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 9:41am On Jan 14, 2019
Na when dem leave na him I come dey feel something for my heart, e come be as if dem dey pound something, my heart just dey sound "Gbagan gbagan", I even think sey I wan get heart attack. E come even be as if my Malle dey call Joyce name inside me. My head come join dey nack, come be as if dem dey dance galala for my head. Na like so I hold my head ooh go one corner go sitdown.

My guys dem walex and Jojo come dey laugh me. As I come observe sey dem dey laugh me, naso I leave where I dey go join dem dey play whot as I be wan yarn dem how I dey feel.

"Guys make I yarn una something." Naso I drop the whot wey I dey play.

"Na wetin, abi you don give another girl belle." Walex yarn.

"No be that jooo, e get as my body dey do me, Joyce just dey scatter by brain."

"Na wetin do your body, abi you wan nack am again?" Jojo yarn.

"E get as my body do me that time wey I dey polongo am especially the time she dey cry, my heart come dey pound."

"Hahaha Jojo, Drogba don dey kolo ooo, abi make we carry you go hospital? Walex ask me. I be don no sey dem go use me laugh. Na only me no the kind thing wey I dey feel, as I never feel am before. The thing come even tire me sef as I no fit do anything, na just Joyce picture dey rotate for my head. E no come tey wey I see one boy dey run come my side, dey shout my name.

"Drogba, Drobga, problem dey ooo." The boy yarn me.

"Na wetin happen." I come ask am. Naso my guys walex and Jojo rush come my side as dem hear my voice na.

"Na your sister oooh, I see your sister for road side, blood dey her body, e bi like sey she wan die ooo." The boy yarn.

"Na which sister you dey talk? Haa haa haaa, dem mama, dem papa, make we dey go."

Naso I come dey run fast, dey yarn anyhow as people dem dey look me, dem dey wonder wetin dey happen. Naso I dey pray ooh, I dey pray make e no be Charity my sister. As we come reach one place wey dem dey call sholey road, we see people many for there, I come even hear people dey talk sey dem rape am. Naso I rush enter their front come see sey na Charity my sister. I no first believe am, as she still dey breath, she be wan tell me something but I no hear am well. I come carry my sister oooh rush am go hospital with my padi, Walex and Jojo. I still no believe sey na my sister I carry for hand. Me no believe sey person go get mind rape the only sister wey remain for me. I just dey cry like small pikin, I no even remember the last time wey I cry last. I just dey boil for where I stand inside hospital. E no come too tey wey I see my Malle and Granmalle enter dey cry. I no even no who yarn dem the matter sey my sister dey hospital. I no like make I dey see my Malle and Granmalle dey cry, the thing dey always pain me for body.

"Doctor howfar?" naso I ask the doctor wen him comot from theatre.

"Can we go to my office please?" The doctor yarn.

"Go do wetin? Abeg yarn me wetin you wan yarn me for here jooo." I para for am.

"Hmm, you have to be strong...I'm sorry, we lost her." The doctor yarn come be as if my head touch ground. I come dey see my Malle and Granmalle dey scream, dey cry, e come be as if the world wan end. My padi walex and Jojo come dey tell me sey make I relax. As dem tell me that thing na so my body come boil more.

"Drogba you be strong guy, the thing don happen already, just forget am make we dey go." Walex yarn me.

"Make I forget wetin? Haaa dem don touch Drogba oooh, haaa I go tear person pant. Person wey do me this go hear from me. Make una tell dem sey Drogba dey come, and for this time around, I go give myself promotion.
Re: Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 5:04pm On Jan 15, 2019
Re: Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 8:54am On Jan 16, 2019

Some days after we bury my sister, I come realize sey I suppose dey closer to my Malle and Granmalle since na only dem I get now. I no sey I get many enemies because nobody fit just rape come kill my sister. The thing pain me die because I still never recover from Titi's death, na him Charity come die join.

For night ooh, I meet my padi walex and jojo for Jamaica inside bar. We come yarn about how we go take catch the person wey kill my sister. Our first suspect na Dele, Joyce bobo, because he be don threaten me before sey him go revenge wetin I do him babe. But me no come think am to Dele side oooh because I feel sey he too dey gentle to do that kind thing, and me feel sey e get one dangerous person wey no like me at all.

"Guys e bi like sey Dele no get family for here, na only Joyce dey with am. Me dey feel sey make we go kidnap Joyce first." Jojo yarn as him dey drink him sixth bottle of stout.

"Make una leave Joyce alone ooh, she no do anything. Since una feel sey na Dele touch me, ehn no wahala naa, make we catch Dele. Make nobody touch Joyce ooo, I dey warn una now." I para for dem.

"But wait oooh, this one wey you dey defend Joyce, abi Drogba you don fall in love?" Jojo yarn.

"Hahahaha, Jojo, you sure sey Drogba fit love? Drogba na devil himself." Walex yarn him own.
Re: Drogba (written in pidgin English) by noble4d(m): 8:42am On Jan 17, 2019

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