What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?

An American lawyer and a Nigerian are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer believes that Nigerians are so dumb that he could put something over on them easily, So the lawyer asks if the Nigerian would like to play a fun game.
The Nigerian is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The American lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500, he says. This catches the Nigerian's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' The Nigerian doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it's the Nigerian's turn. He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with three legs
, and comes down with four?' The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the Nigerian and hands him $500. The Nigerian pockets the $500 and goes right back to sleep.
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the Nigerian up and asks, 'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?'
The Nigerian reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.

Nice joke, LWKMD

The Smuggler

Joseph comes up to the Cotonou border on his bicycle. He's got two large
bags over his shoulders.
The Customs official stops him and says, "What's in the bags?"
"Garri," answered Joseph.
The Customs official says, "We'll just see about that get off the bike."
The Customs official takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them
out and finds nothing in them but garri.
He detains Joseph overnight and has the garri analyzed, only to discover
that there is nothing but pure garri in the bags.
The Customs official releases Joseph, puts the garri into new bags,
hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.
A week later, the same thing happens. The Customs Official asks, "What
have you got?"
"garri," says Joseph.
The Customs official does his thorough examination and discovers that
the bags contain nothing but garri. He gives the garri back to Joseph,
and Joseph crosses the border on his bicycle.
This sequence of events if repeated every day for three years.
Finally, Joseph doesn't show up one day and the Customs official meets
him in a beer parlour in Cotonou.
"Hey, my friend," says the Customs official, "I know you are smuggling
something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about,
I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?"
Joseph sips his beer and says, "Bicycles."

1st joke is simply hilarious. pls keep them coming

Now that was cool!

Nice jokes @poster and Jokingmary

A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?"

"I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise."

"That's amazing," the woman said. "How old are you?'

"Twenty-six!" he said.

Little Johnny came home early from school and started calling his mother with no answer. He finally went up stairs and saw the bedroom door was open a little. When he peered in, he saw his dad on the bed with the maid so he quietly went outside and waited for his mother.

When she showed up with some groceries, he said "Mommy, Mommy guess what I saw? I saw daddy upstairs on the bed with the maid and they were, "

And his Mother said, "Stop right there, Johnny". Wait until supper tonight when the maid is serving the meal. When I wink at you, and then tell me the story."

At supper when all were seated and being served by the maid, she winked and Johnny began again.

"Mommy, when I got home from school early today, I was looking for you and saw daddy on the bed with the maid. They were doing the same thing that I saw you and Uncle Phil doing at the cottage last summer."

R O T F L M A O. The boss i doff ma hat 2 u. 9ice jokes indeed

thanks vic
So how na

I'm cool what about u? Mhen ur jokes are jxt 2 hot 2 touch

I'm cool and thanks for the compliment

Jm who d compliment u?

U did

Wait a sec who b who. Abi na clones una be? Infact who is the original?

U're

funny

So, Jokingmary's got 2 user id's then?

I go blab to the mods then

what make u think i've got 2 ids

Jm ur head needs some check up lol

Thanks vic
I knew it

jokingmary:

what make u think i've got 2 ids

I don't think - I know man

and besides, that's for me to know and for you to find out  

I'm so gonna shaft you to the mods man. . .either to debonsky or mukina  

O boy see jm quaking like earth quake

Do u need transport fare?

I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and noticed that everybody was staring at me,

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.

^^ Nice original joke man!! - I like it 

**but I'm still gonna grass your a*s to the mods man** 

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him.

One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent they would marry, he thought to himself, she'll never go through with the marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the
supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.

Shortly after that they were married.

A few months later, on the way home from work, his car broke down and since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her he would be late because he had to walk. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans
overwhelmed him.

Since he still had several miles to walk he figured he could walk off any ill effects before he got home. So he went in and ordered, and before leaving had 3 extra large helpings of baked
beans. All the way home he putt-putted. By the time he arrived home he felt reasonably safe.

His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!"

She put a blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table and made him promise not to peak.

At this point he was beginning to feel another one coming on.

Just as his wife was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again made him promise not to peek until she returned, and away she went to answer the phone.

While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He had a hard time breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him.

He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. He raised his leg and RRIIIPPPP!!! It sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would dissipate. He got another urge. This was a real blue ribbon winner, the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled and a minute later the flowers on the table were dead.

While keeping an ear tuned in on the conversation in the hallway, and keeping his promise of staying blindfolded, he carried on like this for the next ten minutes, farting and fanning each time with his napkin. When he heard the phone farewells he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when his wife walked in.

Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner table. After assuring her he had not peeked, she removed the blindfold and yelled, "SURPRISE!!!"

To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

OH. . .MY. . .GAWD!!

Jokingmary!! That's was a damn good joke - you got me laughing man!!

oh, keep 'em coming plssssssssssssssssssss

Say Partner
A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen.

He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. "Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?!?!?" he yelled with surprising forcefulness.

No one answered. "Alright, I'm gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain't back outside by the time I finish, I'm gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don't like to have to do what I dun in Texas!"

Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has been returned to the post. He saddled up and started to ride out of town.

The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, "Say partner, before you go, what happened in Texas?"

The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."

Nice! - you're sense of humour has really improved

Gud nite all
Got to go before ma popsi go catch me

you mean your credit don finish abi??