So I made this thread due to a rather awkward incident which could have been a very serious matter that recently happened to a colleague of mine of which I was indirectly involved in.

He came fresh out of motherland so I had been guiding him around you know basically being the chaperone, however this brother has always been nursing the thought of having "an Oyibo girlfriend" , For some reason he was just too over the moon about white girls... the following entailed during the short period he arrived;
*please note I will explain in pidgin English-this is Nairaland, however forgive my pidgin I may not be that articulate*

One day, na im this my bros call me tok say im wan go do shopping make I come escort am go mall unto say, im no fit yarn the country tok for here, oya na I con go my guy man side carry am go shop.

As we dey go the place na, I tell my guy say I go just dey waka for electronics section, as I been wan buy usb drive Tay tay but I been no get time, make im just dey buy im stuff I go meet am later for Kasa counter, omo as I leave this guy, I no know say my guy don dey eye one babe like dat, wey been dey follow buy something... na there the wahala begin.

I buy my usb drive, meet my guy for kasa... the guy just dey open teeth anyhow like rabbit, me sef confuse I con ask am why im dey smile anyhow, na in the guy tok say im go gist me later, toor wetin be my own, I just tell am say make im control the way im been dey open teeth b4 country people for here go think say im be moo moo.

As we reach house na, im tell me say im don tap one babe collect number, omo I shock, how im take do am?? especially since im no fit yarn the country tok for here ... my mind no even reason am Tchai! If say the thing click that time, I for school the guy how tins dey run for here... anyway I just laugh tell am say, so na because im collect Oyibo girl number im been dey open teeth like rabbit wey snake bite, I drop the matter sha Kini big deal if im get oyibo babe, no be im matter?

Two days later, my guy call me with shake shake voice tok say im wan go on a date make I con show am how im go baff up, omo the laugh wey hook me I no fit explain, but unto say I suppose help my guy, I tell am no wahala I dey come.

As I show Im apartment, I ask am how this chic even be because I been no see am, naso this guy tok say she dey like Kim K, she carry for front carry for back, dey waka duck style... me I no tok o, b4 im go tok say I be bad belle pesin, I just tell am make im dey wise unto say, this guy go wan start to dey do form program to impress babe, I just remind am say na school bring am come Europe as per big bros I be.

Sha, I help the guy tidy up for im date, but wetin been dey puzzle me, na how im take dey communicate with this babe, because the side were im dey, country people no dey speak English at all, the ones wey dey try speak English no fit understand am if person tok am with accent- So this my guy matter surprise me, especially since im just arrive, e never spend 2months for here

Anyway, I tell am restaurant where im fit chop nice food give am some few tips con follow give am packaging tips especially for how dem dey behave with woman for here. Omo I no know say wahala don dey near.
*To be continued *

Parked!!

Make una continue the story o

Oya I siddon cross legs

here with my popcorn...

Naija guys no dy carry last

Please switch to English. Thanks

*continued*

Me sef been don taya with my work through out the week, so as my guy tok say im wan go date that Friday, make I show im apartment to tidy am, I just tok say I go siddon play Fifa for im Xbox till im come back, I been wan drop my guy for the restaurant, but I no see the need, besides I been also wan make the guy sabi im way around, so as im comot, I just switch on the Xbox begin dey play game- omo man must rest jare.

I no worry about my guy, because for this part of Europe where we dey, bicycle movement na normal thing, me sef dey use bicycle go work, infact some road dey for just bicycle, plus Google maps, so I no bother myself say im no go fit go im date because im dey use bicycle. Sha I tell am say make im text me when im dey the place. Some minutes later, my guy tok say im don reach, as I see the text, I just balance well with my Juventus for FIFA... CR7 scores siiiiiiiii!

I just use Juventus beat man city for Xbox, Omo naso my phone start to dey ring, as I pick am up na im I hear my guy teh me say; guy something don happen make I show, omo as I con follow hear some country tok for background, na im I know say true true yawa don gas..

Omo, I faya reach restaurant, as I dey faya for road sef my phone don already ring reach 6times, sharp sharp I enter the place go counter, I con see as the manager with two waiters dey try talk to the guy and the guy no understand the manager, manager too no understand am-see wahala.

I quickly ask my guy wetin happen, na im the guy tok say im order Jack Daniels and Bourbon for himself and the babe, na im waiter tok say dem no fit give the babe, omo de tin clear me sharp sharp- because I dey tink things fast. I ask where the babe dey, as the guy show me the side she siddon... na there I con realize the situation (I see say she dey wear braces for teeth as she smile for our direction) The babe na Pikin!

Olboy! Body weak me finish... unto say I don already visualize all the wahala we fit enter for this matter, and the bros still been dey Hala the manager for the drink matter, unto say him wan defend the chic right impress am say im be man, quick quick I signal my guy to shut up, I con speak for country tok tell manager say the guy no understand the menu and im been dey ask for non alcholic wine wey dey im country (I just dey happy say dem no understand my guy) because the guy been don create small scene, I been fear say pesin wey go fit speak english go come interpret the whole matter, na there kasala for bust.

As we take settle matter, I con tell my guy say that Oyibo babe we im tok say be like Kim K, na pikin (But I no blame my guy, true true the heavy brezz and backside wey dat pikin carry, no be here) the guy say how I take sabi, I tell am first first, na pikin dey mostly wear braces for teeth and secondly here no be Africa wey babes dey use football age, u suppose ask for age if not, na prison dat kain tin dey carry person.

As I con talk to the babe question am, true true, the babe na 14yrs... Tchai as I hear 14 yrs, I wan run leave the place sharpenly- omo fear don catch me finish, no wonder even the waiter been see am no free serve am drink. I just dey happy say no be serious scenario wey been involve holding of hands etc if not this matter for don enter hot water, already as him be black man, the matter for dey very tight.

I warn this my guy after this incident say make im confirm any babe age first-hand before any other thing, because some 12 yr old Oyibo girls be like adults and As sen dey hold I-phones and other stuff you no go sabi say na pikin dem be.
As I con ask am how im been dey communicate with am, im been dey use Google Translate and emojis plus the girl just find am entertaining.

For those of una guymen wey travel abroad dey find Oyibo, Abeg Shine your eye o! No go enter wahala.

If you also had an experience please share...

Peace.

UnknownT:
Please switch to English. Thanks

There's a reason I used pidgin, if you don't understand what I posted ... it's likely you weren't meant to understand it

Lol.The hustle de real

Nah which part of Europe bros?
No go pass Netherlands or Belgium or Las Las Germany

Interesting piece. My daughter is gonna be 9 years old this year but she looks 14 . These kids can grow really fast. So one has to be careful.

bicycle nah normal thing?
it's definitely Netherland.

nawa oh, oyinbo girls dy grow, man gats the observant

YOUR FRIEND WAS LUCKY BECAUSE YOU CAME TO HIS RECUSE EM FOR DEY JAIL DEY COOL OFF, ANYWHERE NICE PIECE BRO

Interesting read... Your guy for enter gbege!

optimusprime2

Wetin nyash no go do man

Thank God you dey close by oh

optimusprime2:
*continued*

Me sef been don taya with my work through out the week, so as my guy tok say im wan go date that Friday, make I show im apartment to tidy am, I just tok say I go siddon play Fifa for im Xbox till im come back, I been wan drop my guy for the restaurant, but I no see the need, besides I been also wan make the guy sabi im way around, so as im comot, I just switch on the Xbox begin dey play game- omo man must rest jare.

I no worry about my guy, because for this part of Europe where we dey, bicycle movement na normal thing, me sef dey use bicycle go work, infact some road dey for just bicycle, plus Google maps, so I no bother myself say im no go fit go im date because im dey use bicycle. Sha I tell am say make im text me when im dey the place. Some minutes later, my guy tok say im don reach, as I see the text, I just balance well with my Juventus for FIFA... CR7 scores siiiiiiiii!

I just use Juventus beat man city for Xbox, Omo naso my phone start to dey ring, as I pick am up na im I hear my guy teh me say; guy something don happen make I show, omo as I con follow hear some country tok for background, na im I know say true true yawa don gas..

Omo, I faya reach restaurant, as I dey faya for road sef my phone don already ring reach 6times, sharp sharp I enter the place go counter, I con see as the manager with two waiters dey try talk to the guy and the guy no understand the manager, manager too no understand am-see wahala.

I quickly ask my guy wetin happen, na im the guy tok say im order Jack Daniels and Bourbon for himself and the babe, na im waiter tok say dem no fit give the babe, omo de tin clear me sharp sharp- because I dey tink things fast. I ask where the babe dey, as the guy show me the side she siddon... na there I con realize the situation (I see say she dey wear braces for teeth as she smile for our direction) The babe na Pikin!

Olboy! Body weak me finish... unto say I don already visualize all the wahala we fit enter for this matter, and the bros still been dey Hala the manager for the drink matter, unto say him wan defend the chic right impress am say im be man, quick quick I signal my guy to shut up, I con speak for country tok tell manager say the guy no understand the menu and im been dey ask for non alcholic wine wey dey im country (I just dey happy say dem no understand my guy) because the guy been don create small scene, I been fear say pesin wey go fit speak english go come interpret the whole matter, na there kasala for bust.

As we take settle matter, I con tell my guy say that Oyibo babe we im tok say be like Kim K, na pikin (But I no blame my guy, true true the heavy brezz and backside wey dat pikin carry, no be here) the guy say how I take sabi, I tell am first first, na pikin dey mostly wear braces for teeth and secondly here no be Africa wey babes dey use football age, u suppose ask for age if not, na prison dat kain tin dey carry person.

As I con talk to the babe question am, true true, the babe na 14yrs... Tchai as I hear 14 yrs, I wan run leave the place sharpenly- omo fear don catch me finish, no wonder even the waiter been see am no free serve am drink. I just dey happy say no be serious scenario wey been involve holding of hands etc if not this matter for don enter hot water, already as him be black man, the matter for dey very tight.

I warn this my guy after this incident say make im confirm any babe age first-hand before any other thing, because some 12 yr old Oyibo girls be like adults and As sen dey hold I-phones and other stuff you no go sabi say na pikin dem be.
As I con ask am how im been dey communicate with am, im been dey use Google Translate and emojis plus the girl just find am entertaining.

For those of una guymen wey travel abroad dey find Oyibo, Abeg Shine your eye o! No go enter wahala.

If you also had an experience please share...

Peace.

Hahaha, funny narrative, tell d Guyman make him take time oo, shine his eyes very well especially when talking to oyinbo because some of them dey between 14 to 16 years old and dem carry idiroko, idumota and dem mammary gland big like water melon, I don talk my own finish, I no dey too look whity girls, those days when I still dey flirt, I don chop plenty of dem taya but today I don hang my boot because I be AngelicBeing

ayosamlove:
Nah which part of Europe bros?
No go pass Netherlands or Belgium or Las Las Germany

This particular incident occurred in Denmark.

FCBboy:
bicycle nah normal thing?

it's definitely Netherland.

I think Denmark is bigger on bicycling than Netherlands, but its a close call though.

optimusprime2:

This particular incident occurred in Denmark.

Oh okay boss. I duh like that place b that oo

Romance would have been a better place to post this topic bruh

optimusprime2:
*continued*

Me sef been don taya with my work through out the week, so as my guy tok say im wan go date that Friday, make I show im apartment to tidy am, I just tok say I go siddon play Fifa for im Xbox till im come back, I been wan drop my guy for the restaurant, but I no see the need, besides I been also wan make the guy sabi im way around, so as im comot, I just switch on the Xbox begin dey play game- omo man must rest jare.

I no worry about my guy, because for this part of Europe where we dey, bicycle movement na normal thing, me sef dey use bicycle go work, infact some road dey for just bicycle, plus Google maps, so I no bother myself say im no go fit go im date because im dey use bicycle. Sha I tell am say make im text me when im dey the place. Some minutes later, my guy tok say im don reach, as I see the text, I just balance well with my Juventus for FIFA... CR7 scores siiiiiiiii!

I just use Juventus beat man city for Xbox, Omo naso my phone start to dey ring, as I pick am up na im I hear my guy teh me say; guy something don happen make I show, omo as I con follow hear some country tok for background, na im I know say true true yawa don gas..

Omo, I faya reach restaurant, as I dey faya for road sef my phone don already ring reach 6times, sharp sharp I enter the place go counter, I con see as the manager with two waiters dey try talk to the guy and the guy no understand the manager, manager too no understand am-see wahala.

I quickly ask my guy wetin happen, na im the guy tok say im order Jack Daniels and Bourbon for himself and the babe, na im waiter tok say dem no fit give the babe, omo de tin clear me sharp sharp- because I dey tink things fast. I ask where the babe dey, as the guy show me the side she siddon... na there I con realize the situation (I see say she dey wear braces for teeth as she smile for our direction) The babe na Pikin!

Olboy! Body weak me finish... unto say I don already visualize all the wahala we fit enter for this matter, and the bros still been dey Hala the manager for the drink matter, unto say him wan defend the chic right impress am say im be man, quick quick I signal my guy to shut up, I con speak for country tok tell manager say the guy no understand the menu and im been dey ask for non alcholic wine wey dey im country (I just dey happy say dem no understand my guy) because the guy been don create small scene, I been fear say pesin wey go fit speak english go come interpret the whole matter, na there kasala for bust.

As we take settle matter, I con tell my guy say that Oyibo babe we im tok say be like Kim K, na pikin (But I no blame my guy, true true the heavy brezz and backside wey dat pikin carry, no be here) the guy say how I take sabi, I tell am first first, na pikin dey mostly wear braces for teeth and secondly here no be Africa wey babes dey use football age, u suppose ask for age if not, na prison dat kain tin dey carry person.

As I con talk to the babe question am, true true, the babe na 14yrs... Tchai as I hear 14 yrs, I wan run leave the place sharpenly- omo fear don catch me finish, no wonder even the waiter been see am no free serve am drink. I just dey happy say no be serious scenario wey been involve holding of hands etc if not this matter for don enter hot water, already as him be black man, the matter for dey very tight.

I warn this my guy after this incident say make im confirm any babe age first-hand before any other thing, because some 12 yr old Oyibo girls be like adults and As sen dey hold I-phones and other stuff you no go sabi say na pikin dem be.
As I con ask am how im been dey communicate with am, im been dey use Google Translate and emojis plus the girl just find am entertaining.

For those of una guymen wey travel abroad dey find Oyibo, Abeg Shine your eye o! No go enter wahala.

If you also had an experience please share...

Peace.

Please can you type the English version so that we can vote unanimously to move it to front page for intending migrant and people to learn from thanks

Mizwisdom:
Romance would have been a better place to post this topic bruh

Well, it seems so if you are considering the plot but it also highlights the uniqueness of other regions in the world, which is my emphasis.
I.e the bicycling, language, and people facts

zolajpower:

Please can you type the English version so that we can vote unanimously to move it to front page for intending migrant and people to learn from thanks

Let's vote,
Likes for English version
Shares for allowing it to be in Pidgin

Omo baba alayı, I grab the info. Unto the brace matter, na every pikin the wear brace for teeth? E no possible say some adult fit they wear am too na?

Also, you know think say some of this pikin fit de lie for their age na? Maybe, she tell the nija guy say she be adult but whey never reach true true?

Cc optimusprime2

Nice story. Insightful.

DAramis:
Omo baba alayı, I grab the info. Unto the brace matter, na every pikin the wear brace for teeth? E no possible say some adult fit they wear am too na?

Also, you know think say some of this pikin fit de lie for their age na? Maybe, she tell the nija guy say she be adult but whey never reach true true?

Cc optimusprime2

For the braces matter, adults dey follow wear am, but very rarely unto say for here Dentist parole na serious issue, all teeth setting suppose don be for young age. To start to dey set teeth as adult no be small money be that.

For age matter, dem no dey lie age if you ask, because dem sabi say yawa fit gas if dem tok lie for their age.

Hahahahaha this shit nearly happened to me those years, for Muslim country 19 years old girl just dey follow me smile inside bus, see babe package die...as she approached me first thing I asked was her age,as she Yan 19, oboy I get emergency drop off oooooooo. ... Na so I Holla bus driver say I don reach my bus stop before Sharia law take over

ayosamlove:
Nah which part of Europe bros?
No go pass Netherlands or Belgium or Las Las Germany

.
That should be Canada,I hope I got it right

optimusprime2:

This particular incident occurred in Denmark.

Baba shey u no go come check the mail on your YIM nii bayii?

optimusprime2:

Let's vote,
Likes for English version
Shares for allowing it to be in Pidgin

Abeg leave am for pidgin English o. If you do otherwise, the matter fit sprout up like beans o and dem fit link am up o. Las Las, yawa go bust.

I hear say for obodo oyibo, dem no dey carry this can matter joke o. Say person fit tear an adult slap while another person do as your guy do, say na the second person go enter black house before the speed of light o.

If the person and the babe come do the do, na where matter go just wear pant o. 50yrs fit be the lowest the person fit get o while the person we tear person slap fit do community service after all him arguments.