Everyone who does not want to be part of joke therapy anymore please look at the bottom left corner on the group's page there's an option to leave the group please don't post it on the wall rather inbox me a request to leave.
Now that that is done hope you like this evening's entertainment!

Just one victory
A certain couple loved to compete with each other, comparing their achievements in every aspect of their lives: salaries, athletic abilities, social accomplishments, and so on. Everything was a contest, and the husband sank into a deep depression because he had yet to win a single one.

Finally he sought professional counsel, explaining to the shrink that while he wouldn't mind losing once in a while, his unbroken string of defeats had gotten him pretty down. "Simple enough. All we have to do is devise a game which you can't possibly lose."

The shrink thought for a moment, then proposed a pissing contest. "Whoever can pee higher on the wall wins- and how could any woman win?"

Running home, the husband called upstairs, "Darling, I've got a new game!"

"OOOH, I love games," she squealed, running down the stairs. "WHAT IS IT?"

"C'mon out here" he instructed, pulling her around to the patio. "We're going to stand here, piss on the wall, and whoever makes the highest mark wins."

"What fun! I'll go first." The woman proceeded to lift her dress, then her leg, and pee on the wall about six inches from the ground. She turned to him expectantly.

"Okay, now it's my turn," said the husband eagerly. He unzipped his fly, pulled out his penis, and was just about to pee when his wife interrupted.

"Hang on a sec," she cried out. "NO HANDS ALLOWED!"

A LIFT To TOWN!

This English gentleman was driving his Roller through wild Wales,

When all of a sudden this chap called Dai (for it was he) jumps out into the middle of the single-track road brandishing a 12 bore shotgun and pointing it directly at Fotherington-Smythe. F-S screeched to halt. A year's worth of rubber on the Roller's tires burned in a couple of seconds.

Dai gestures with the barrel of the gun that F-S should wind down the window. F-S does not feel like arguing.

"W, w, what do you want?" asks F-S.

"Masturbate!" says Dai.

"What? Here and now?" Asks F-S incredulously.

"Aye, aye, and be quick about it" replies Dai, waving the barrel of the aged shotgun an inch from F-S' right ear.

After F-S had filled his hanky he asked "Now what?"

"Masturbate!" says Dai.

"What? Again?" asks F-S.

"Aye, aye, and be quicker about it" replies Dai, waving the barrel of the aged shotgun closer to F-S' right ear.

Comes the time when F-S asks again "Now what?"

"Masturbate!" says Dai.

"What? Again?" asks F-S.

"Aye, aye, and be quicker again" replies Dai, poking the barrel of the aged shotgun against F-S' earlug.

This went on for quite a while until F-S finally implored "I can't. I can't. I've got nothing more to offer. Anything, anything else, please, don't expect me to do that again for a fortnight, please ask me to do something else".

"Oh. Ok then." says Dai "you can now give my daughter a lift into town, "

**faints while laughing**

lmao, of course no hands allowed!
nice one poster!

LMAO at the 1st joke

but I didn't quite catch the gist of the 2nd joke!!

Was F-S asked to self service Dai over and over again just to ensure he kept his hands off Dai's daughter??