Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,194,814 members, 7,956,076 topics. Date: Monday, 23 September 2024 at 12:27 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Humourous Romance Jokes (17924 Views)
Letter To Nepa & Sundry Jokes. . . / Chinese and Asian Jokes / Nigerian Jokes (2) (3) (4)
Humourous Romance Jokes by ojesymsym: 10:29am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Sipho gets married and on his wedding night he calls his Father for some tips on what to do, since he has never been with a woman before. "So what do I do first?" His father: "Take her clothes off and lay her on the bed." , 5 minutes later Sipho's on the phone again. "She's unclothed and in bed, what do I do now?" His father can't believe what he is hearing, "Take your d*mn clothes off and get into bed with her." After another 5 minutes poor Sipho is on the phone again. "Dad, I'm unclothed and in bed with her, what do I do now?" His dad's patience is now running thin so he says, "Stupid son, do I have to spell everything out for you? Just put the hardest thing on your body where she pees. Good night!!!" Just when the old man starts snoring, His son is on the phone once again. "Ok Dad, I have my head in the toilet bowl what do I do next?" "DROWN YOURSELF YOU BLOODY FOOL !" |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by ojesymsym: 10:29am On Dec 03, 2010 |
A young guy was complaining to his Boss about the problems he was having with his stubborn girlfriend. "She gets me so angry sometimes I could hit her, the young man exclaimed." "Well, I'll tell you what I used to do with my wife" replied the Boss. "Whenever she got out of hand I'd take her pants down and spank her". , Shaking his head the young guy replied "I've tried that, it doesn't work for me. Once I get her pants down I'm not mad anymore." |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by ojesymsym: 10:30am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Man & wife In front of Gorilla cage in a zoo. man says: Excite him like you do to me! Wife removes her top, Gorilla goes crazy. Man :Tease him more, like you do to me! Wife removes her jeans. Gorilla goes wilder. Man opens cage, pushes wife in & says : , NOW TELL HIM U HAVE HEADACHE & U R NOT IN THE MOOD ! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by ojesymsym: 10:34am On Dec 03, 2010 |
A man who makes caskets was going to deliver one of his coffins when his car broke down. trying not to be late, he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination. the Nigerian Police saw him and wanted to make some money off him so they challenged him. "where u dey carry dat thing go?! trust an sharp ma, n, "i no like the place where dem bury me so i dey try relocate", omo police no wait |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by MrCork7: 10:37am On Dec 03, 2010 |
ojesymsym, ermm brother. what do did u smoke? |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Yorisb: 10:38am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Jokes and(with) Romance - Wrong packaging Chin Chin! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by ojesymsym: 10:42am On Dec 03, 2010 |
A unclothed woman boards an igbo man taxi in lagos, Ibo man staring at her says nothing but does not start the car. Woman: wat? U've neva seen a unclothed woman before, driver: I no dey look u madam, I just dey wonder where u keep the money wey u wan take pay me |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Dyt(f): 10:51am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Wo wo wo u got me laughin bom bom kip em comin |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by WackyJ1(m): 11:23am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Keep em coming |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by MrCork7: 11:26am On Dec 03, 2010 |
ojesymsym. brother, u must be the funniest man in Enugu |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Yorisb: 11:31am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Mr¬Cork: But why Enugu Chin Chin! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by ojesymsym: 11:55am On Dec 03, 2010 |
Mr¬Cork: You and who de stay Enugu Yorisb: Help me ask am o |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Nobody: 1:19pm On Dec 03, 2010 |
@ojsymsym- damn dude! you got me laughing like a motherforker. keep 'em coming!!! this is some hilarious stuff. |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by deboski4u: 5:06pm On Dec 03, 2010 |
expecting more from ojes, keep it up |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by bababuff(m): 5:29pm On Dec 03, 2010 |
ojesymsym: This is one anger management I must recommend to the psycho on my street, who likes to beat his wife. |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by sonuga(m): 7:32pm On Dec 03, 2010 |
• One day, little Johnny refuses to go to school until he takes his pussy cat to school. • He cries n cries so hard dat his parent had no choice but to allow him go with the cat to school!! • Little Johnny is happy n goes off to school with his favourite pet. • In school, his teacher asks him why he is in school with his cat? • little johnny holds tight to his cat and says he over heard his dad tell his mom that he will 'eat her pussy' when he comes back from work!! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by joepineapp: 6:24am On Dec 04, 2010 |
haha |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Canisma(m): 2:27pm On Dec 04, 2010 |
A young teacher wanting to tease her pupils, posed a question; children, on the day of rapture, what part of our body will we first use to enter heaven ? Young kemi raises her hand; auntie,auntie ! Yes kemi, said the teacher. The young girl answered, our two feets. The suprised teacher curiosly asked; and why do you say so sweetie, the girl answered; auntie, last night after our night prayer, i was woken up by the noise by my mum, on reaching the door, i found out that it was locked, so i peeped thru the key hole and saw my mum's two legs high up in the air and i heard her shouting " Aaaawww gaaad, im cooommiiiinng " |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by WackyJ1(m): 3:23pm On Dec 04, 2010 |
Lmao!! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by spicyhoney(f): 4:09pm On Dec 04, 2010 |
Nice and funny! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by kitlady02(f): 5:57pm On Dec 04, 2010 |
ojesymsym: |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by DAY12(m): 6:16pm On Dec 04, 2010 |
Why I Fired My Secretary Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, 'Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy Birthday.' I thought, Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids, They will remember. My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, 'Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! ' It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.' I said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go !' We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day, We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do we ?' I responded, 'I guess not. What do you have in mind?' She said, 'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner.' After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, 'Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back.' 'Ok.' I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake , Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'. And I just sat there, On the couch, NAK-ED. |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by spicyhoney(f): 7:56pm On Dec 04, 2010 |
DAY11.: lol, i can picture the scene! |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by greedie1(f): 12:40am On Dec 05, 2010 |
Very nice jokes, poster u try wella |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Dsense(m): 1:06am On Dec 05, 2010 |
looooooool, . . . . , Funny |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by obowunmi(m): 1:13am On Dec 05, 2010 |
Funny thread. |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by ismaeel86(m): 1:39am On Dec 05, 2010 |
d first one really gat me laughing. |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Jonesjoe(m): 10:00am On Dec 05, 2010 |
cant stand the laughter. Jus lafin lyk a kid. Keep em comin |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by Nobody: 5:54pm On Dec 07, 2010 |
nice combinations |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by aristocrat(m): 4:58pm On Dec 09, 2010 |
very funny. nice of u guy. |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by sutoboy(m): 3:25am On Dec 10, 2010 |
@poster, ur head dey dere gan |
Re: Humourous Romance Jokes by WackyJ1(m): 7:45am On Dec 11, 2010 |
More More More |
(1) (Reply)
Tell Us About Your April Fool Prank Today / School Uniforms For MAULAG Students / Two Things Involved
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 41 |