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Advice For Single Guys About Marriage - Family - Nairaland

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Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Nobody: 5:17pm On Feb 29, 2020
Though I am not married yet, but I have been able to gather lots of experience(s) from friends and family members, and I'd like to share some.

1. Don't wait until you *hammer" or "blow" before getting married.

Find love first before money.

Any woman that can stay with you in your nothingness, will not be carried away when riches come. This doesn't mean you should be comfortable where you are. Continue to hustle and strive for a comfortable life. Look for a woman while you're at it, fall in love and marry. Both of you should build together.

I have seen lots of marriages that started with the guy having, but crumbled when he lost his job or business.


2. Don't spend so much on your wedding or marriage ceremony and then go back broke after the celebrations.

You need to find out very well about your spouse's culture and tradition....the list cost and all other expenses. Sit her down and have a heart to heart discussion about how much you're ready to part with. Don't go showing off like you're dangote's son. Cut your coat according to your cloth.
Let her understand that after the wedding, there are much more responsibility to be met.

I have this very close friend, who was a hustler and he made some cool cash. Then he met this girl from imo state and after a while, he decided to marry her.
At the lady's place(village), they brought out 5 different list, categorized into:

1. PHD list...........about 2 mil naira
2. MSc list..............,,. 1 mil naira
3. BSc list,...............,,. 800,000 naira
4. HND list,..............,,. 500,000 naira
5. OND/NCE list......,,. 250,000 naira

Not too sure about the exact amount though, but not too far from what's above.

To cut the story short, my friend spent over 1 mil naira on traditional marriage alone, including dowry, the food, the drinks, the list, the umu ada, etc. In fact, they brought out another issue: That the lady won't be allowed to do her trad cos they didn't bury their dad well. They didn't buy cow. My friend had to pay for that too.

Today, he's yet to do his white wedding, but he has started borrowing......even as little as 5k. A handsome, and good looking guy, now looks like a shop "boy boy".....with stress written all over his face. Business closed down.

I am not mocking him. I'm just advising us and even myself. You can't afford to spend so much on trad alone and then go broke. It's not wise a thing to do. Let's wake up guys. Let's wake up!

There are still ladies out there who are ready to marry you in your financial low level, as long as you are not lazy, you're ambitious, you're a hustler who wants to make something out of life.

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Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Mizwisdom(f): 5:21pm On Feb 29, 2020
Did you advice the ones that have been successfully married till date? everybody wants to be unnecessarily relevant

7 Likes

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by ikh777: 5:30pm On Feb 29, 2020
OcVoice:
Though I am not married yet, but I have been able to gather lots of experience(s) from friends and family members, and I'd like to share some.

1. Don't wait until you *hammer" or "blow" before getting married.

Find love first before money.

Any woman that can stay with you in your nothingness, will not be carried away when riches come. This doesn't mean you should be comfortable where you are. Continue to hustle and strive for a comfortable life. Look for a woman while you're at it, fall in love and marry. Both of you should build together.

I have seen lots of marriages that started with the guy having, but crumbled when he lost his job or business.


2. Don't spend so much on your wedding or marriage ceremony and then go back broke after the celebrations.

You need to find out very well about your spouse's culture and tradition....the list cost and all other expenses. Sit her down and have a heart to heart discussion about how much you're ready to part with. Don't go showing off like you're dangote's son. Cut your coat according to your cloth.
Let her understand that after the wedding, there are much more responsibility to be met.

I have this very close friend, who was a hustler and he made some cool cash. Then he met this girl from imo state and after a while, he decided to marry her.
At the lady's place(village), they brought out 5 different list, categorized into:

1. PHD list...........about 2 mil naira
2. MSc list..............,,. 1 mil naira
3. BSc list,...............,,. 800,000 naira
4. HND list,..............,,. 500,000 naira
5. OND/NCE list......,,. 250,000 naira

Not too sure about the exact amount though, but not too far from what's above.

To cut the story short, my friend spent over 1 mil naira on traditional marriage alone, including dowry, the food, the drinks, the list, the umu ada, etc. In fact, they brought out another issue: That the lady won't be allowed to do her trad cos they didn't bury their dad well. They didn't buy cow. My friend had to pay for that too.

Today, he's yet to do his white wedding, but he has started borrowing......even as little as 5k. A handsome, and good looking guy, now looks like a shop "boy boy".....with stress written all over his face. Business closed down.

I am not mocking him. I'm just advising us and even myself. You can't afford to spend so much on trad alone and then go broke. It's not wise a thing to do. Let's wake up guys. Let's wake up!

There are still ladies out there who are ready to marry you in your financial low level, as long as you are not lazy, you're ambitious, you're a hustler who wants to make something out of life.

You are NOT qualified to talk about this.

Everyone has their own VISION and that is not your business.

If your father had a car when you were born or had his own house and business when you were born, then now you are still hustling at 30, what do you make of that, are you not going to be marrying in a worse state?

Dont say country was different back then because even back then they complained...

Dont say all fingers are not equal because you just tried to make them equal by this THREAD POST.


WEDDING IS ONCE IN A LIFE TIME, allow people marry the best they can, rather than tell them the LIES YOU PUT UP THERE....

Sadly you were not told the FULL TRUTH that after WEDDING..... things do not get better, EXPENSES TRIPLE and that means finances plunge downwards.

So wedding according to your pocket seems NICE but in Nigeria of today may not be wise. Make sure your pocket is deep enough for you, your wife and your first child before PUTTING A RING ON IT.


Any lady that complains should ADD HER MONEY to the guy's money else she is just a cheap shot trying to use the guy to get the ring and marry.

If your salary is not above 150K in this BUHARI regime, the only way you can marry is if your wife to be is earning above 70k and willing to join her cash with yours else..... YOU ARE IN FOR A RUDE SHOCK OF YOUR LIFE.


That is how you people will tell people to MARRY CHEAPLY but when they face strong poverty in their homes, you will NOT help, rather you will avoid them. Pls let us stop giving advice that put people in trouble. IF A LADY AND A MAN HAS NO JOB ABOVE MINIMUM WAGE, THEY BOTH SHOULD REMAIN SINGLE.

MARRIAGE IS NOT SYNONYMOUS TO MANAGE.



we all have goals and dreams.... society should not make us lower our vision or goals.

Wanting to be RICH before marriage is something everyone wishes for BUT only FEW WORK TOWARDS IT DILIGENTLY.

So am not talking about those who WISH or BUILD castles in the air, BUT for the hustling lady and man out there.

Have you ever seen married women in a bus PUT OUT THEIR BREASTS TO FEED THEIR BABIES and the whole bus has seen her private boooobs.... I feel irritated and pity for such people... some are pregnant and dragging one child on one hand while carrying another.... IT IS THE INSANE MENTALITY NIGERIANS HAVE.

See, true LOVE will not allow the child to be born into LESS THAN AVERAGE or POVERTY SITUATION. Because it gives a terrible mentality that affects later in life.

PLS BE WISE., MARRY ACCORDING TO YOUR VISION AND PLAN... be patient... spend less on wedding but MORE on MARRIAGE.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Uyi168: 7:08pm On Feb 29, 2020
Why is everyone claiming marriage experts lately

2 Likes

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by CAPSLOCKED: 7:36pm On Feb 29, 2020
Uyi168:
Why is everyone claiming marriage experts lately

I JUST TIRE.

1 Like

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Ishilove: 7:43pm On Feb 29, 2020
Op, you better take your own advice.

1 Like

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Omar09(m): 7:45pm On Feb 29, 2020
I've got books on how to not get married.
Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by ValCon888: 7:58pm On Feb 29, 2020
Marriage is the biggest scam on earth, invented by Eve the greatest yahoo girl in history.

Adam was tired of her lazy ass and wanted an extra pair of tits to play with. He was God's favourite creation, the lord and master of everything God created, and he knew his request for a three-sòme would be granted.

But evil Eve got wind of his plan and connived with the Devil to give him an apple.

And the rest is history.

1 Like

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Acidosis(m): 8:13pm On Feb 29, 2020
OcVoice:



Today, he's yet to do his white wedding, but he has started borrowing......even as little as 5k. A handsome, and good looking guy, now looks like a shop "boy boy".....with stress written all over his face. Business closed down.

I am not mocking him. I'm just advising us and even myself.



grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by CAPSLOCKED: 8:31pm On Feb 29, 2020
Omar09:
I've got books on how to not get married.

WHAT DO YOU NEED BOOKS FOR WHEN THERE ARE REAL LIFE REASONS EVERYDAY?

1 Like

Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by Omar09(m): 10:34pm On Feb 29, 2020
CAPSLOCKED:


WHAT DO YOU NEED BOOKS FOR WHEN THERE ARE REAL LIFE REASONS EVERYDAY?

Some are blind enough not to see the real life reasons. They gotta read it and I've got some money to make.
Re: Advice For Single Guys About Marriage by snitchbitch: 10:01am On Mar 01, 2020
I pray I find a loving woman to marry me this year, because I have more enemies than the people I have met self!!!

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