If someone asks you for a favor and you really dont wanna do it, just say No.

Dont please other people at your own expense and then feel bad about it when you could have politely said No.

And then, dont start blaming that person for inconviniencing you afterwards when you could have said No. They did not force you to say Yes.


Bottomline, if you are not in a position to help, dont offer or accept to help. Because then you'll feel bad afterwards and make everyone around you miserable.


Life would be much better if we lived this way.

Just my two cents.

I may have posted this on the wrong section - please move it where it needs to be . . since I cant.

thanks

@ OP

I love your two cents.

I am "learning that right now." My fiancee is teaching me "how to say no." I have always helped even when I could not and then I would be unhappy or irritated with myself.

I am learning how to do this without "feeling guilty."

Thank you for your post.

Very true.

op/
My kindness would never let me say that .  . . . .Nowadays i'm trying to be the worst person ever to some pple cause of their attitute but still can't .  . . .  .I still have to help them out!

kokoye:

If someone asks you for a favor and you really dont wanna do it, just say No.

Dont please other people at your own expense and then feel bad about it when you could have politely said No.

And then, dont start blaming that person for inconviniencing you afterwards when you could have said No. They did not force you to say Yes.


Bottomline, if you are not in a position to help, dont offer or accept to help. Because then you'll feel bad afterwards and make everyone around you miserable.


Life would be much better if we lived this way.

Just my two cents.

A point well made kokoye. I'm not ashamed to admit that I use to be one of those always trying to help and lend a helping hand and then wonder why I was getting stressed out and upset. I realized that some people WILL take your kindness for weakness and KEEP coming back to you. Word from the wise my people!

i love saying no

Pastor Koyoke is in session. Let the church say AMEN! (passing around offering plate) We don't accept small bills either!

Thanks for the responses.

@ Dsense,

it is OK to help people as long as you are OK with it and dont feel used. If you are going to feel used afterwards, Please say NO.  

Really, it is not everyone that will feel offended by being turned down. So we cannot assume someone will feel bad when you say No to them.

What's worse for us to feel bad after offering a helping hand.

If you say No and the person gets offended, they will get over it in 2 or 3 days max.

But if you say Yes and feel used, you will and hate yourself for it and loathe the person you offered to help.

very hard 4 me, but i always try. . .

Mrs, Eve:

Pastor Koyoke is in session. Let the church say AMEN! (passing around offering plate) We don't accept small bills either!

Eve, I never appointed you to be my usher  . . .yet.

I will collect my own money. Amen  

I don't want to be usher anyway! I want to be the deaconess because we get to screw the pastor behind the pulprit!

oh damn!

[i]eve[/i]il!

lmao! Eve az totally killed me

Mrs, Eve:

I don't want to be usher anyway!  I want to be the deaconess because we get to screw the pastor behind the pulprit!  

Eve hmn

op.
You are right!
Tell me wha't the meaning of your name ''Kokoye''?

Kokoye is what some people call hispanics / south americans.

@op i totally agree wit u. But most tyms its just difficult saying no since u dont want 2 hurt d odas feeling. Saying yes wen u dont mean it can make u feel resentful 2wards d oda person.

kokoye:

Kokoye is what some people call hispanics / south americans.

LOOOOOL
Na nice name anyway

Saying no is really a problem for me xpecially when it comes to helping people,though i've realized that they use that as an advantage and always come asking for help even with things they shouldn't,i just hope i can learn to say no without feeling like a bad person.

^^^

Try it and be free.

Poster, how would you deal with family members that don't take 'No' for an answer?

^^^

will they force you??

that is where you learn to put your foot down . . . . . they will get used to it.

Hell NO!!!

It is not easy to say NO when they come at you like love-struck puppies

well, very hard smtimes to say no.if u say no,
u are hated,whe u say yes u end up hating urself.

nawa.

l can't just say NO like that,rather l apply diplomacy patterns to say it

Update:

I said no last night and was manhandled.

Nice piece

Do the little you can, it must not be no,