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Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by APOSTLECHUMA: 10:46pm On Apr 21, 2020
Human beings copied that from God as the whole bible is full of stories of God's never failing love for Israel and honestly friends, we cant take away the fact that there are peopl who have special places in our hearts and doing this doesnt mean we hate others. However it can draw jealousy and hatred from others against the person that is loved more, as can be seen in the story of joseph and his brothers in the bible and even by the level of hatred nations ( mostly arabs and muslims nations ) hav for israel all because of the special love God has for them.

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by PSTGlobal(m): 10:57pm On Apr 21, 2020
This is bad, it won't encourage the other child. Most children are suffering from depressed due to this .

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 11:03pm On Apr 21, 2020
Parisian:
I don't understand how people do it. I love all my siblings equally. I love my mom and dad equally too.

Same here too. I love all of them equally. I wonder how they chose who to love more. It's not something I can really wrap my head around.

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Faithful23(f): 11:10pm On Apr 21, 2020
No doubt Parent do have their favorite child, but displaying the act of favoritism in the presence of the other siblings can be very dangerous for the favorite child.


It can lead to evil and malicious act.

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by remigreat(f): 11:14pm On Apr 21, 2020
Loving one child more than the other is an act that should be discouraged in the family. We all remember the biblical Joseph that his brothers sold into slavery? It was because the parents love him more than his brethren. It birthed jealousy and hatred for him. Thank God for His mercy that saved him at the end. We may "love" one more than the other but we shouldn't Let it be obvious
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by remigreat(f): 11:15pm On Apr 21, 2020
Also, if there are character defects in the other child (ren), we can go to God in prayers and He will definitely change them for better.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by ibinaboonline: 11:44pm On Apr 21, 2020
Very wise. But......until you have one of those sensitive children who smell fish from hundred miles away....
sherylbakky:
The truth is, as long as our personalities differ as humans....Parent/parents will always love one child more than other/others.

What is not good is making it obvious to the extent that everyone including the sibling/siblings notice.

It's better to keep it to themselves and care equally for all the children.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Sapeleboy911(m): 12:19am On Apr 22, 2020
I'm guilty of this. I so much love and cherish my first daughter daughter more than her siblings. I don't know how to handle this feeling.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by johnnyn1(m): 12:26am On Apr 22, 2020
What about parents comparing their son to another son in the family??
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by PropertyBuying(f): 12:41am On Apr 22, 2020
Thiwalade:
Hmmmm, we will always develop preferences as humans no matter how hard we try.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Zhahovic(m): 1:04am On Apr 22, 2020
It happens alot same way we love a new shirt more than old shirt.
..
Well just don't make it obvious... Remember how biblical Jacob had a favorite son?
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by openmine(m): 1:08am On Apr 22, 2020
honniemail:
When we were growing, each of us thought we were our dad's favorite cos of the attention he gives everyone of us not until he died and his friends were telling us how the fourth born was his fav, guys you won't believe this was the person we thought our dad does not like at all. Any extra work we are to do after our individual cores is always on her...still wondering why he is always doing that.,..is it because he doesn't want us to know she was his fav?? Any way dad Continue to rest in the bosom of the Lord..
Why should you believe the words of a man's friend when he is not alive to defend himself?
Even a person's best friend with ulterior motives can cause disharmony in a united family!
Don't let your dad's so called friends to bring division that was never there in the first place!
Just stick to the initial belief that your dad loved everyone equally...instead of the unverified words of an outsider!

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Nobody: 1:16am On Apr 22, 2020
Anumpama:
Dear nairalanders
.
This question have been bothering me for long
.
Is it good for parents to love one of their child more than one.

What is your view?

It's a silly idea and it creates enemity between siblings n destroys a family.

Everyone must luv all their children equally, my mum did that.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Nobody: 1:16am On Apr 22, 2020
sherylbakky:
The truth is, as long as our personalities differ as humans....Parent/parents will always love one child more than other/others.

What is not good is making it obvious to the extent that everyone including the sibling/siblings notice.

It's better to keep it to themselves and care equally for all the children.

Not everyone loves one of their children more than others
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Gkemz: 1:24am On Apr 22, 2020
I've seen it and I've witnessed it and it feels so bad to discriminate against a child or show favouritism to one. I believe in equity and fairness. Every child deserve equal treatment. Absence of equity leads to strife, grievances. It gives the child no sense of belonging and could make the child turn hostile and embittered with an acrimony against every other members of the house all the time. None of offspring will be treated differently but i will love all of them equally.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Opeakins(m): 1:50am On Apr 22, 2020
Nah from something like diz depression Dey start
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by kayusely70(m): 3:00am On Apr 22, 2020
One shouldnt let it be obvious to them
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by lighternote: 5:04am On Apr 22, 2020
That's a very terrible thing to do as a parent and should NEVER be justified by any stupid "similar personality" analogy.
Favoritism in the family is tell tale sign of narcissistic parenting, where a parent favors only the golden child, the child who conforms to their control and expectations. It's really terrible.
As a parent, you must love all your kids equally including the delinquent or disabled. The world is already full of discrimination and discrimination within the family shouldn't be one of them.
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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by jeph19(m): 6:21am On Apr 22, 2020
Mum never loved me when I was growing up... Because she was forced to marry my dad, it got to a point I had to run away from home.
She was always supporting my step brother ; though younger... Now I'm 26 and I still remember how she'd flog me and shut me up when I try correcting my younger brother.

Last Christmas, I went to get her wrapper immediately I got to the shop to buy the wrapper, I remembered my childhood in a flash and left the shop without buying her anything.

I can buy things for siblings, and nephew but when I intend getting her something, I just get cold and end up not buying her anything.
Though we're cordial but there's no passion in buying her gift

She promised to buy me calculation in chemistry when I was in SS2 and till date (500level) she didn't...till now, i still remember her unfulfilled promises to me.

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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Fourwall: 6:30am On Apr 22, 2020
In some homes it is easily evident while in others it is not. Some factors are responsible for this act.
Deformity: A friend of mine has a bad leg,actually he had polio as a child, this made his parents show extra care and affection towards him. His siblings followed the same line as there parents towards him aswell.

Loyalty: A loyal child most definitely is the apple of the eyes of both parents. Most parents select a child with this trait unknownly.
But in all parents have a way of not making you feel more important than your siblings so you don't become foolish.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by shugabasbn: 7:02am On Apr 22, 2020
Just have a kid there won't be need for comparative
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Dasshboard(m): 7:10am On Apr 22, 2020
It is not a good Idea. But such you can't help.
More like a reflex/involuntary action.

One of the kids will constantly display character traits that would make you have a special liking for him/her even without you knowing.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by zagorakis(m): 7:44am On Apr 22, 2020
How?


9jayes:
Yoruba proverb says "Omo toba shiwo lobie n gbe" can someone interpret it for me.


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Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Blaze232(m): 7:50am On Apr 22, 2020
Its wrong seriously... It can push children to become deviants
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by MISSCONGENIALITY(f): 8:07am On Apr 22, 2020
It's natural but some parents are able to hide it.
Even in a family, some siblings are closer to each other than to other siblings in the same home.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by slashthroat: 9:23am On Apr 22, 2020
sassysure:
Very bad.
It has destroyed relationships.
Bred hardened children.
Has killed so many siblings.

Wish parents can see what this is causing.

Hmmm you had your thinking cap on this one
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by slashthroat: 9:25am On Apr 22, 2020
jeph19:
Mum never loved me when I was growing up... Because she was forced to marry my dad, it got to a point I had to run away from home.
She was always supporting my step brother ; though younger... Now I'm 26 and I still remember how she'd flog me and shut me up when I try correcting my younger brother.

Last Christmas, I went to get her wrapper immediately I got to the shop to buy the wrapper, I remembered my childhood in a flash and left the shop without buying her anything.

I can buy things for siblings, and nephew but when I intend getting her something, I just get cold and end up not buying her anything.
Though we're cordial but there's no passion in buying her gift

She promised to buy me calculation in chemistry when I was in SS2 and till date (500level) she didn't...till now, i still remember her unfulfilled promises to me.

Awww i pray your relationship with her gets better.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Honeydenz(f): 9:55am On Apr 22, 2020
ibkayee:
Is it 'good'? Well it's not ideal, but it probably happens more often than parents would like to admit and I don't think it's something you can always control.

The most important thing is that your children never actually know, don't make it evident. You do this by putting in EQUAL efforts into showing and providing them with love in their own (possibly very different), personal love languages. None of them should feel deprived of it compared to another
While this sounds reasonable, MOTHERS love all their children equally and without bias. It is evident in their behavior when any child falls into trouble. The same way they panic over paul is same way they panic over peter. But fathers can easily backout if the going gets tough especially if that child have a reputation of getting into troubles. The act of loving one child over the other aka preference is found amongst FATHERS.
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by AkhereOkaka(m): 10:08am On Apr 22, 2020
sherylbakky:
The truth is, as long as our personalities differ as humans....Parent/parents will always love one child more than other/others.

What is not good is making it obvious to the extent that everyone including the sibling/siblings notice.

It's better to keep it to themselves and care equally for all the children.
You've said it all, cause if it is obvious it can lead to bad blood,
Re: Parents Loving One Of Their Children More Than The Others: Your Opinion by Onucs(m): 10:21am On Apr 22, 2020
it is natural to like one child from the others because of the difference in their characters and personalities. However, parents do not have to make it obvious and act as if the others count for very little (even though that might not be the case). this can have diverse effect on children as

- Some will want to do everything possible to win the parents favour

- Some may develop hatred for their parent/parents

- Others may develop hatred for the preferred child etc

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