Acidosis:


You're a good woman and your husband is not a bad man. Please refer back to my first post and have a heart-to-heart discussion with him. He's obviously a spender, not necessarily lazy. Someone only needs to give him the message to embrace the current realities. All the best.

Acidosis:


Same way she wouldn't take your posts seriously, I mean those of you insulting a married man that took care of his family up until (and even after) he lost his job.

I'm surprised you still had the courage to quote me after contesting the issue of savings.

Whatever makes you happy abeg.

Funmilehot:
He's trying. On some part I will agree with u he's lazy. I've begged severally we move out to a lower house cos of rent but his pride won't let him rather he will end up saying words that made him a victim and making me feel bad.

uboma:



Are you still saying that he is not being lazy?

I give up on you. No need to debate on this with you any further.

merahki:



Courage, how?
Meanwhile your first post is a total horror, you need to see it for the no-no that it is. Insight, the first step
I reacted to it accordingly, because it rubbed me off the wrong way. But with your second post you showed some acknowledgement of the lady’s efforts, you tried to be understanding and were not the usual judgemental you. I quoted you because I liked that particular post. It was a much nicer and human post than the first one. I didn’t know I needed to have a shot of whiskey before quoting the big bad wolf

I contested the issue of savings? You sanctimoniously decided how long it was supposed to last and because that’s not you wearing the particular shoe, I called you out on that. So what are you saying?
You know what? You are the person who found a special way to judge the woman, poor people who lose their jobs and run down their savings sooner than you are comfortable with, people who can’t save, people who feel overwhelmed with life’s problems, all in one post! That is all shades of taking the cake.

GboyegaD:


Following the effects of the stay at home order where some did not receive salaries and the obvious outcomes we read, you can tell our savings culture isn't top notch and OP's husband might be among those who do not have much savings.

My husband has been paying the rent effortlessly from 2014 upto 2017. He was laid off early 2018. He had savings of about 900k but all was expended on further search for jobs, taking care of the family, flights and accommodation to Abuja in search of connections, and the burial of his aunt. I will still say he has really tried and I appreciate his efforts.

His elder sister do send him something at times but he will lie to me she sent something lesser. Last December I saw alert of 150k on his phone but he lied to me his sister sent him 40k. He took us to shoprite, next day he bought loads of turkey shirts and other stuffs worth more...

uboma:



It is annoying to see some men behave so irresponsibly.

Two years is enough time to have gotten something small to do at least to support his struggling wife.

Mariangeles:


Stop making excuses for such a behaviour.
2years is too damn long for a man not to do anything but rely solely on his wife. ( I've always talked about this)
You talk as if jobs are the only option...Just imagine
His type are probably one of those who are too proud to take smaller jobs than they previously had.
Personally, I wouldn't stand for such a behaviour

Funmilehot:
Please let's sheathe our swords.

My husband has been paying the rent effortlessly from 2014 upto 2017. He was laid off early 2018. He had savings of about 900k but all was expended on further search for jobs, taking care of the family, flights and accommodation to Abuja in search of connections, and the burial of his aunt. I will still say he has really tried and I appreciate his efforts. I stepped in late 2018 carrying the family along with my life savings and I paid for 2018 rent with ease. Last years rent was a bit tough for me cos all my life savings were depleted.
He's against us moving out to a low cost area cos according to him he's getting something soon so he can't downgrade and he's dissapointed in me for suggesting such.. His elder sister do send him something at times but he will lie to me she sent something lesser. Last December I saw alert of 150k on his phone but he lied to me his sister sent him 40k. He took us to shoprite, next day he bought loads of turkey shirts and other stuffs worth more than the 40k he claimed his sister sent him. I kept that to myself.

Currently we are carrying face cos he begged I should borrow him 50k to service his car.(i do not know if anything is wrong with the car or not) I told him I don't have. He said I was just paid last week I insisted I don't have, that's how I became enemy of progress who wants him to be moving with legs. Meanwhile there's a car but me and my kids are Always on our legs jumping from one bus to the other.
I do not know how to go about this money for servicing of his car. I'm just confused.

Acidosis:
No savings when he lost his job? I asked this because I don't believe people (always) go broke immediately they lose their job. There are people that would survive quite well for at least 6 months to a year without a job.

He buys nice clothes for himself out of your salary while you make do with old and tattered clothes? Is this true?

What does it even mean to call someone that lost his/her job 'lazy'? I'm trying to imagine what I would do if I lost a job? Perhaps, begin to walk from Obalende to Mowe Mondays to Fridays to show that I'm super hard- walking ?

I understand the frustration. Women always try to resist the idea of providing whether on a short-term or long-term. May be it wasn't what you signed up for but then, life happens. This is what a lot of us fail to consider before tying the nut.

Not sure I have the right words for you. But, I would urge you to hold on and continue to encourage your man. Show your frustration through your gentle words. He would get the message someday.

Munzy14:

He is a trophy husband....


At least no be every time trophy wife trophy wife.

Mariangeles:

So, are you a potential trophy husband?
Good morning

Munzy14:

good morning.


No be only trophy na friendly match husband...


Local man has learnt to make his money from childhood biko.


It is common for a man to carry the family for lifetime.

but give it to a woman for a day, ooohh!!! the whole thing moves down south..lol

sisisioge:
Haaa! Let me not talk! May God continue to bless your hustle. I bet your husband is a Yoruba man...majority of them were especially taught to marry women who can carry the family load alone in case they are incapacitated...which isn't bad. But they tend to want to remain incapacitated once the woman can do it. I' am Yoruba by the way and I've seen a lot of them!

From next month, stock the house with food, buy yourself something nice and manage the rest. Once it finishes, it finishes na niyen. May God bless your hustle. And no more picket money for your HUSBAND! Stop enabling his laziness!

uboma:



Are you still saying that he is not being lazy?

I give up on you. No need to debate on this with you any further.

Munzy14:

good morning.


No be only trophy na friendly match husband...


Local man has learnt to make his money from childhood biko.


It is common for a man to carry the family for lifetime.

but give it to a woman for a day, ooohh!!! the whole thing moves down south..lol

Lucyspa:




God bless you for saying the truth.. Yoruba men only marry financially stable women, they most times don't care beauty. I know this because i live in Akure and i see this a lot. I attended big schools and most of my classmates have mothers who were divorced or married but still paying all the bills. Most of these women were very rich too with financially unstable men. Sometimes, i wonder how u guys cope and on top of that, the man will still cheat. Yoruba women are hustlers and hard working while their men are not men enough. I really dont like yoruba men but i dont hate them either just that their attitudes towards life and family is not great.

Lucyspa:



I bet that acidosis is a yoruba man, no cap. They are mostly lazy and do not see anything bad in a woman feeding them for 2 years. Tueh

Mariangeles:



Well, that's because it's not supposed to be so.
It'll wear her out.

Lucyspa:


Where are you from pls? I like the way reason

bukatyne:


Hahahahahahaha!

See how you washed our men!

Na wa o!

Lucyspa:



I bet that acidosis is a yoruba man, no cap. They are mostly lazy and do not see anything bad in a woman feeding them for 2 years. Tueh

Coldplay007:


Nobody should be jobless for years.. there is always something to do. Guys in Lagos and PH can relate, but he wants to stay in his village and be doing fine boy..

Lucyspa:



I bet that acid osis is a yoruba man, no cap. They are mostly lazy and do not see anything bad in a woman feeding them for 2 years. Tueh

donbachi:
A man is jobless no mean laziness...the wife said "out if job for 2 years",so not like he has never worked before...no man is lazy,just dat his own opportunity never come.

Acidosis:


Lol. Your issues are beyond redemption. Even after the woman came back to clear the air, you still choose to remain stup/d with your 2 years feeding money assumptions.

Now the issue has translated from laziness and joblessness to tribal. Good luck to you with your diagnosis of another woman's home while yours remain a future and nearly impossible tense.

bukatyne:


Hahahahahahaha!

See how you washed our men!

Na wa o!

Lucyspa:



Are you yoruba or not? Simple question

Acidosis:


I am. What's the next question? Is my wife feeding me or not?

Acidosis:


I am. What's the next question? Is my wife feeding me or not?

Mariangeles:


Stop making excuses for such a behaviour.
2years is too damn long for a man not to do anything but rely solely on his wife. ( I've always talked about this)
You talk as if jobs are the only option...Just imagine
His type are probably one of those who are too proud to take smaller jobs than they previously had.
Personally, I wouldn't stand for such a behaviour