Two sisters inherited the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they were in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they needed to purchase a bull so that they could breed their own stock.

The sister who balanced their checkbook, a brunette, took their last 600 dollars out west to a ranch where a man had a prize bull for sale. Upon leaving, she told her blonde sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."

The brunette arrived at the man's ranch, inspected the bull, and decided she did want to buy it. The man told her that he would sell it for 599 dollars, no less. After paying him, she drove to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.

She walked into the telegraph office, and said, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."

The telegraph operator explained that he'd be glad to help her, then added, "It's just 99 cents a word." Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only had 1 dollar left. She realized that she'd only be able to send her sister one word.

After thinking for a few minutes, she nodded, and said, "I want you to send her the word, 'comfortable.'"

The telegraph operator shook his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her the word, 'comfortable'?"

The sister explained, "She'll read it very slowly: Come-for-the-bull"


One day a drunk man told the bartender, "I'll bet you $100 that I can bite my right eye." The bartender grinned and said, "Okay, you drunk." The drunk pulled out his right fake eye and bit it. After more drinks the drunk said, "I bet you $200 I can bite my left eye." The bartender knew it could not be fake, so he said, "Okay." The drunk pulled out his dentures and bit his left eye. The bartender, by now was really mad. After a few more drinks, the drunk said, "I'll bet you $500 that if you slide a shot glass down the bar, I can hop on each stool and pee in it without getting a drop on your bar." The bartender knew he could not do it so he said okay. The bartender slid the shot glass as fast as he could. The drunk jumped on stools and peed all over the bar. The bartender jumped up and screamed in joy because he won $500. In the back he heard, a man yelling in frustration. He asked the man why. The man replied, "That drunk fool bet me $1000 that he can pee on your bar and you would be happy about it!"