Hathor5:


You have made this story up, haven't you?

Bros I have got very many things to do than sitting down and making up stories.I have since called him and adviced based on some points that some people have made here.Its his choice to follow that advice or not.The home is his own.

liberalchick:
Lol Nigerian men and “she [b]denied me sex” the word “deny” already betrays what the problem is. If your attitude to marital sex is entitlement and your right to have it [/b] because you paid bride price, you’ve already failed. You wife is a human being and women also love sex. When you think of marital sex as only your right to have and enjoy, it can never end well. Men that aren’t selfish lovers, men that their wives orgasm is equally as important as his, don’t open all these threads.

Thank you for this! The other time I was discussing with a group of friends offline and told them this, the got defensive but it's the reality people face in marriages. I told them The husbands money is his money and not his wife's (interchangeablly) and the wife's body is her body not their bodies. If a husband stops his wife from using any of his properties,she can't do much to fight it, if a woman or man decides not to satisfy his or her partner sexually, you can't sue her or him for it. Contrary to narratives propagated as norms, they are just sweet talk people delude themselves with. The best anyone can do for him or herself is to get a partner who is willing and ready to share.

Reality is, it's no one's right but how much one is permitted to have.

bukatyne:


Why na?

I don't like this type of play.

You want to draw us back to the 18th Century?

Biko stop it.

The wife owns her body and can do whatever she likes with it.

You are finding 'their' trouble

Exjoker:
This is the best advice I have seen so far.

To all those saying the man should not find another woman don't know what they are talking about. How can one's spouse deny his/her partner of sex

You should understand that denying the man sex is choice the lady made and I don't think even their parents can change that especially if the lady don't derived pleasure during sex with her husband. For how long will she put with something she doesn't like

What if after all negotiations they woman still doesn't want to change

Will the man go on like without that sex NEVER!!!!!
How can we even be sure that the man tried all this thing we are suggesting here and yet the woman refuses to change

marrying a second is not solving the problem

naturally both men and women we use tools our disposal to send a massage what do i mean women use sex a tool to send a message that something is wrong, some men start coming home late and not touching food

so the woman is not a good communicator if she using sex as tool to get something addressed

and the man also should ask the main reason he is being denied sex ?

Palema007:
Well it seems some women are dams here, always wet and flowing. Ever ready to take Men anytime any day After all their bodies belong to their Men and they have no right to object their advances.



Lol .

This submission has a derisive connotation; it's like a submission from a Woke-Christian Order member. Say hello to pocohantas and hathor5 and others too numerous to mention.

Eschew derision, and say no to paranoia, sententiousness and cynicism.

Oya, make una no vex because I no get strength for bickering today, maybe tomorrow.

LordKO:


This submission has a derisive connotation; it's like a submission from a Woke-Christian Order member. Say hello to pocoh antas and hat hor5 and others too numerous to mention.

Eschew derision, and say no to paranoia, sententiousness and cynicism.

Oya, make una no vex because I no get strength for bickering today, maybe tomorrow.

Lol... LordKO I don't have time for hide and seek, when you are ready to stand by your pettiness.Let me know. Maybe then we can talk things through.

Palema007:
Lol... LordKO I don't have time for hide and seek, when you are ready to stand by your pettiness.Let me know. Maybe then we can talk things through.

Lol, I've stirred up a hornet's nest. No vex, you know say na ma personal person you be. Pettiness de sweet sometimes.

LordKO:


Lol, I've stirred hornet's nest. No vex, you know say na ma personal person you be. Pettiness de sweet sometime.

I thought as much, at least you agreed you can be petty sometimes. Lol I can too. However you can counter an opinion without insults right?

LordKO:


This submission has a derisive connotation; it's like a submission from a Woke-Christian Order member. Say hello to pocohantas and hathor and others too numerous to mention.

Oya, make una no vex because I no get strength for bickering today, maybe tomorrow.

LordKO:


LOL, on a very good-bad day trouble na my second name, just dat I can't be caught being an instigator.

The irony. Then we have the typical gaslighting of highly pretentious folks. Throw stones then hide your hands. Oga, keep me out of your nonsense. Later someone will say I am haunting my “ex-bf”. I no dey even see you, but to stay your lane just hard for you.

sisisioge:
Hmmmm....when sex is off the table, the marriage is already one leg out.

Biko stay our of their business. Here is what will happen anyways...

1. He will stay focused at home for another few months until he meets a girl he likes, fall into her cookies jar, stay in there a happy man, come to terms with madam cookie hoarding, dont bother her at all until madam realises that its been 7 months without him pestering and decides to catch him. She catches him and all hell breaks.

2. He stays focused at home until December when he does his yearly reflection and decides he couldn't continue. He starts actively fighting with madam for the lamest reasons. They drag it until next year June before openly deciding that they do not love each other anymore. Everyone either goes their separate ways or they stay indoors as roomies. Poor children!

It is well...why would anyone marry someone that doesn't turn them on like a switch? May God help us.

Nothing more to add

Palema007:
Thank you for this! The other time I was discussing with a group of friends offline and told them this, the got defensive but it's the reality people face in marriages. I told them The husbands money is his money and not his wife's (interchangeablly) and the wife's body is her body not their bodies. If a husband stops his wife from using any of his properties,she can't do much to fight it, if a woman or man decides not to satisfy his or her partner sexually, you can't sue her or him for it. Contrary to narratives propagated as norms, they are just sweet talk people delude themselves with. The best anyone can do for him or herself is to get a partner who is willing and ready to share.

Reality is, it's no one's right but how much one is permitted to have.

A woman hoarding sex can lead to several outcomes
The man keeping mistresses
marrying extra wife
Or even dissolution of the marriage.

So who losses in the end?
Why did she get married in the first place if she had such intents?

That's why we are having many broken homes today
And most of the times
Children born in those kind of homes bear the brunt

I have seen such cases
The man moves on remarries
The woman faces her own thing
The children born into such homes
Then turns into cretins

In fact there is a case reported to me by a Friend last Sunday
The man remarried and moved on
There first daughter still in ss3 around 16
Was impregnated by a 19 year old school mate
And she has been married off to the 19 year old Muslim northern boy

That poor girl won't know what she did to herself till she is in her 30s

Divorce should, as a matter of practicality, always be on the table. This is 2020 ffs

yettymuse:
[s] His sexual needs may be more than the bills he pays.
Does he take care of his woman’s needs?? Is she still working?? Does he spoil her? Is she COMFORTABLE??

You think it’s easy to take care of 2kids and a Bigger Baby! Y’all cut these women some slacks!

You think it’s just to pay bills? In this age, lots of women can conveniently pay bills too...

If you don’t Moisturize a woman’s libido with good money, care and attention...she goes completely dry!

This is why I don’t find marriage interesting..especially in this part of the world.. plenty stress, no benefits no bag!
... all you got is a miserly MRS title that can’t even open doors! Taaaaaaaah! with a mad society expecting so much from you!

Unromantic Nigerian Men! Mtchewwww!!![/s]

Na only dust you dey yarn for this forum.

Palema007:
I thought as much, at least you agreed you can be petty sometimes. Lol I can too. However you can counter an opinion without insults right?

Keep quiet there! Advice isn't a curse. You all should stop this irritating act of equating derision to opinion - yes, since pettiness is our hallmark at Woke-Christian Order, I've no choice than to take passive pleasure in it. Your derision is simply an opinion, but my derisive opinion is an insult, a typical thought process of our members. Lol.

For those men who might be swayed by comments advising romance, be advised that romance CAN NOT make a woman want to fúck you if she doesn't want to.

Maybe many people are unaware that rich men's wives pay for hotel room to get lashed by their sideboys. If romance could sustain desire, Seal an Heidi Klum would still be married today .

The moment you need to do more than you used to to negotiate any woman into wanting to part legs, realise it's time to seek another puna.

YOU CANNOT NEGOTIATE DESIRE

djon78:





A woman hoarding sex can lead to several outcomes
The man keeping mistresses
marrying extra wife
Or even dissolution of the marriage.

So who losses in the end?
Why did she get married in the first place if she had such intents?

That's why we are having many broken homes today
And most of the times
Children born in those kind of homes bear the brunt

I have seen such cases
The man moves on remarries
The woman faces her own thing
The children born into such homes
Then turns into cretins

I do not support women hoarding sex, I don't think I have typed anything of such here, however other than the fact that some women do it intentionally,some don't. Some women lose their libidos, enthusiasm, confidence and interest in sex especially after child birth, some experience post natal shock/changes in their bodies. Now my problem is, some Men do not understand this they labeled it as hoarding and its very pitiable to read that some women believe this too. As you can see on this thread, a sarcastic comment from a supposed wife or mother. I wonder why Most Nigerians are very judgemental though. And why Nigerian Men hardly take interest in understanding their women's anatomies. Has the said husband ever tried to understand his wife and her reasons or try to help her be in the mood? Do this Men understand that, Men are always ready why Women need to be ready? Do they understand that Men have sex to ease stress, while Women have to ease stress to have Sex? Do this Men understand this difference? No. And their next available option? Get a girlfriend! Why get married in the first place if all you need is a intimacy gadget and not a wife?


And as far the post you quote, that is the reality. It is left to you to find person who is willing to share. It's not that difficult

pocohantas:


Lol. Looks like he is deliberately thickening the plot.

Too obvious.

LordKO:


Keep quiet there! Advice isn't a curse. You all should stop this irritating act of equating derision to opinion - yes, since pettiness is our hallmark at Woke-Christian Order, I've no choice than to take passive pleasure in it. Your derision is simply an opinion, but my derisive opinion is an insult, a typical thought process of our members. Lol.

I can see you are on your period... what drugs do you use for your cramps?

pocohantas:





The irony. Then we have the typical gaslighting of highly pretentious folks. Throw stones then hide your hands.

Oga, keep me out of your nonsense. Later someone will say I am haunting my “ex-bf”. I no dey even see you, but to stay your lane just hard for you.

Me wey be monk, an old man for dat mata, I no fit be your current or ex-bf na. Na ma sista you be, a good one for dat mata.

See as you de pretend like say you no happy say I don give you attention 3 times dis year. Lol.

Just take a new leaf and see as I go take facilitate your appointment as commissioner for finance for Abia State by 2023.

But I no do you any bad, so I wonder why you de vex for me. Na ma personal person you be as always.

pocohantas:


The irony. Then we have the typical gaslighting of highly pretentious folks. Throw stones then hide your hands.

Oga, keep me out of your nonsense. Later someone will say I am haunting my “ex-bf”. I no dey even see you, but to stay your lane just hard for you.

Who is cooler than cool?

Palema007:
Well it seems some women are dams here, always wet and flowing Ever ready to take Men anytime any day After all their bodies belong to their Men and they have no right to object their advances.



Lol .

The thing is men that really love their wives don’t open threads that their wives ‘denied’ them sex. When you think your wife is a paid sex object, this is what you get. Nobody talks or cares when the wife is in the mood for sex but the husband isn’t, somehow wives are supposed to understand sometimes your spouse isn’t in the mood for sex. It’s all about the man.

LordKO:


Me wey be monk, an old man for dat mata, I no fit be your current or ex-bf na. Na ma sista you be, a good one for dat mata.

See as you de pretend like say you no happy say I don give you attention 3 times dis year. Lol.

Just take a new leaf and see as I go take facilitate your appointment as commissioner for finance for Abia State by 2023. But I no do you any bad, so I wonder why you de vex for me. Na ma personal person you be as always.

Spare me this. Use it on someone else.
Thanks

Hathor5:


Who is cooler than cool?

I don’t even know how they do it.

Sixfeetbelle:


Why is it that men never seem to agree that they're just not that good in bed in some of these "wife denies sex" cases? Sticking it in always can get boring and uninteresting very quickly for someone who seeks enjoyment in the bedroom.

You, sef, you sabi knack woman into seventh heaven? Different women against different styles?

Why did she give him sex before they got married if he was that bad at séx?

liberalchick:


The thing is men that really love their wives don’t open threads that their wives ‘denied’ them sex. When you think your wife is a paid sex object, this is what you get. Nobody talks or cares when the wife is in the mood for sex but the husband isn’t, somehow wives are supposed to understand sometimes your spouse isn’t in the mood for sex. It’s all about the man.

Men that don't open threads have already found outside help. The OP's friend is obviously a simp otherwise he'd know what to do

pocohantas:


I don’t even know how they do it.

People are said to have more than 10 psychological defense mechanisms.

Unnerve:

A wife who seeks sexual enjoyment and is not getting it from her husband ought to guide him and take charge of the bedroom with her superior knowledge. Simply laying down like a log of wood and expecting him to work a miracle, helps no one.

Some "traditional" men actually expects their wives to lie down like a log of wood while they do all the work. It emasculates them to see a woman being in charge of anything, much less in the bedroom he has the utmost right over.

Woe betide her if she dares try to explore her sexual fantasies beyond what is recommended by the traditional values.

How will a wife in such home seek this "sexual enjoymemt" that you speak of, pray tell?

liberalchick:


The thing is men that really love their wives don’t open threads that their wives ‘denied’ them sex. When you think your wife is a paid sex object, this is what you get. Nobody talks or cares when the wife is in the mood for sex but the husband isn’t, somehow wives are supposed to understand sometimes your spouse isn’t in the mood for sex. It’s all about the man.

Honestly sometimes Women are their own worst enemies. How can someone type: Wife guard your husband (which is quite reasonable) and someone will respond with such sarcastic post. Like it is always the women fault and men don't turn down sex too.


The one that off me completely is LordKO that is having cramps on top another person's matter... . Nawa ooo

[s]

Hathor5:

People are said to have more than 10 psychological defense mechanisms.

[/s]

pocohantas:


Spare me this. Use it on someone else.
Thanks

Keep quiet there. Your right to liberty is limited to decorum, as far as I'm concerned, anything else is unacceptable.

[s]

Hathor5:

Who is cooler than cool?

[/s]

[s]

Hathor5:

Too obvious.

[/s]