We all claim we individually want an honest, transparent and trustworthy partner that is very committed in our individual relationships. But most of us are saying it is wrong for husband and wife to have access to each other's phones.

It is like saying "I want someone without mouth odour but I don't want anybody to come near me". How will you identify those without mouth odour? If you are not sharing with another person what you should share with your spouse alone and if you are not closer to an outsider than you are to your spouse, why do you deny your spouse free access to your phone?

Do not misunderstand me. Do not think I want people to monitor their spouses as if the spouses are criminals. Checking my wife's phone to confirm her faithfulness will never be my habit. I will not try it even a day. If checking her phone is how I can confirm her faithfulness, it means I am dumb.

But I should have free access to her phone and she should have free access to my phone. If I deny her free access to my phone, it means I am afraid that I might get a dirty message or call from someone when she is using the phone.

What can be more personal to you than your sexual organ? You have access to each other's sexual organs but you are debating whether you should share phones. This generation has lived immoral life to a point that vanity is treasured over natural things that money cannot create. It is a pity.

No wonder people password their phones and refuse to disclose it, yet most people are generous with their bodies. Some people have offered their bodies to almost everyone around them but do not allow anybody to check their phones. Whatever information you consider personal to yourself in your phone is not as personal as your sexual organs. Whoever does not deserve access to that information does not deserve access to your sexual organs. As for people who do sensitive jobs that require high level of confidentiality, get a separate phone for the job. Only few jobs demand such. But a driver or a driver of a public transport hides his phone from his wife as if his phone contains the top secret of the federal government. A woman that sells fish or vegetables is hiding her phone from her husband as if her phone is the database of the central bank.

But for those who desire transparency in their marriages, try to be rational so your actions will not hinder your desire. If you are the type that runs mad when your spouse renders a justifiable help to a family member or a friend, you are tempting the spouse to deny you free access to his or her phone. If you are the type that forces your spouse to lavish savings on expensive wears, he or she may choose to hide phone from you so you would not know his or her earnings. This is more reason you should choose someone whose mentality (understanding) is similar to yours. Facial look and material possession cannot be as satisfying as character.