When things are breaking apart with the wife and you know there is likely hood she will take the kids how does a man ensure he has a firm and unbreakable bond with the children so that in the long run the relationship will endure even is former spouses turn to be major adversaries.. First thought is to pamper with gifts but that seem superficial and transient,

advice needed

This your writing ehn

initiate:
When things are breaking apart with the wife and you know there is likely hood she will take the kids how does a man ensure he has a firm and unbreakable bond with the children so that in the long run the relationship will endure even is former spouses turn to be major adversaries.. First thought is to pamper with gifts but that seem superficial and transient,

advice needed

Children aren't stupid that you would think pampering them when all becomes dire will cause them to forget all the years of neglect and possible hurt you may have inflicted on them or contributed to causing them. You need to take responsibility for for problems you have helped create, "die to self" so they can once again see the one they once loved in you.

Klass99:


Nothing wrong with it (for me) he wrote something and I understood him, communication has taken place as far as I am concerned

@ initiate, I think divorced men who have a good relationship with their kids will be in a better position to advise you.

But I think these activities may help build a great rapport and no d with your kids;

1. If you can swim, teach your kids how to yourself OR get a teacher to teach all of you. But, spend time with them in a pool as much as you can.

2. Try bicycle riding together or taking walks with popcorn, water and other treats.

3. If or when they're in college, visit on visiting days and please don't go empty headed with only a gift of money. Carry along provisions and a decent meal too.... it's unbelievable the number of fathers who drive long distance to visit a child in boarding school and they take nothing except themselves and money . That's good but make it better with food items.

4. When they are at an age where they can drive, teach them or better still send them to a good driving school. But, when they're done learning regularly sit beside them and let them drive you/your car to improve the skill learnt.

Gifts are good but be physically present as well, make your times together enjoyable and memorable. And please discipline them too when the need arises don't shy away from it.

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Spend time with them doing anything...helping with their homework, taking them out with you when you are going grocery shopping or going around the corner,and buy them ice cream. You can also get involved with their grooming; bathing them, brushing their teeth, if they are still small.

Children are easy to win over. You just have to invest time.

initiate:
When things are breaking apart with the wife and you know there is likely hood she will take the kids how does a man ensure he has a firm and unbreakable bond with the children so that in the long run the relationship will endure even is former spouses turn to be major adversaries.. First thought is to pamper with gifts but that seem superficial and transient,

advice needed

I think if you want to win the heart of your family as a married man,

Love your wife and the children will love you more

Create a bond between you your children and they will ever wait for you to come home before they can eat or sleep

Provide for your family needs and appreciate your wife if she happens to be the bread winner

Protect your wife as the chief security officer of your family

Try and do all these and see how she will find it difficult to think of leaving you talk more of taking the kids away

mardis:
This your writing ehn

errors made during typing. Apologies!

Klass99:


Nothing wrong with it (for me) he wrote something and I understood him, communication has taken place as far as I am concerned

@ initiate, I think divorced men who have a good relationship with their kids will be in a better position to advise you.

But I think these activities may help build a great rapport and bond with your kids;

1. If you can swim, teach your kids how to yourself OR get a teacher to teach all of you. But, spend time with them in a pool as much as you can.

2. Try bicycle riding together or taking walks with popcorn, water and other treats.

3. If or when they're in college, visit on visiting days and please don't go empty headed with only a gift of money. Carry along provisions and a decent meal too.... it's unbelievable the number of fathers who drive long distance to visit a child in boarding school and they take nothing except themselves and money . That's good but make it better with food items as well.

4. When they are at an age where they can drive, teach them or better still send them to a driving school. But, when they're done learning, regularly sit beside them and let them drive you/your car to improve the skill learnt.

Gifts are good but be physically present as well, make your times together enjoyable and memorable. Discipline them too when the need arises don't shy away from it.

thanks for the insights, much appreciated.

ImaIma1:
Spend time with them doing anything...helping with their homework, taking them out with you when you are going grocery shopping or going around the corner,and buy them ice cream. You can also get involved with their grooming; bathing them, brushing their teeth, if they are still small.

Children are easy to win over. You just have to invest time.

very well

initiate:
When things are breaking apart with the wife and you know there is likely hood she will take the kids how does a man ensure he has a firm and unbreakable bond with the children so that in the long run the relationship will endure even is former spouses turn to be major adversaries.. First thought is to pamper with gifts but that seem superficial and transient,

advice needed

It's simple. Love them. Inspire them. Teach them. Listen to them. Attend to their fears. Attend to their insecurities. Guide their sexual life. Participate in their fun activities. Take them out. Share your pains with them. Don't be afraid to apologize to them when you are wrong...and above all, create an investment for them. Do these and you will always be in the heart of your kids.