LilMissFavvy:
He should forgive the wife if she is genuinely sorry and repented. The issue should be kept as top secret. He and wife can be splitting the children's bills, or if wife is financially buoyant enough, let her be paying the fees alone, while the man pays rents, other bills etc. Let him accept them, afterall people adopt kids.

Michelle55:

Let's assume it's your brother in this situation, would you give him the same advice knowing that the wife lied to him from the onset? Do think about it before responding, let's try to give advice that we can also swallow if we find ourselves in the same situation.

That's paternity fraud, what would happen if the man didn't find out earlier? There's nothing wrong in adoption or training another's man child/children as long as he's doing so consciously and willingly with no iota of deception from the woman's side.

She broke that vow when she decided to open her legs for another man who isn't her husband and not just that, but also getting pregnant in the process. She should bear the brunt alone.

Michelle55:

Let's assume it's your brother in this situation, would you give him the same advice knowing that the wife lied to him from the onset? Do think about it before responding, let's try to give advice that we can also swallow if we find ourselves in the same situation.

That's paternity fraud, what would happen if the man didn't find out earlier? There's nothing wrong in adoption or training another's man child/children as long as he's doing so consciously and willingly with no iota of deception from the woman's side.

She broke that vow when she decided to open her legs for another man who isn't her husband and not just that, but also getting pregnant in the process. She should bear the brunt alone.

LilMissFavvy:
He should forgive the wife if she is genuinely sorry and repented. The issue should be kept as top secret. He and wife can be splitting the children's bills, or if wife is financially buoyant enough, let her be paying the fees alone, while the man pays rents, other bills etc. Let him accept them, afterall people adopt kids.

LilMissFavvy:
You didn't see where I said if she's genuinely sorry/ repented? That is the grounds on which I feel she can be forgiven and given another chance. If you feel otherwise, I believe he has seen your advice.

GTCO:
Were the said kids had after he was legally married to the woman? If yes, the kids are his... He can continue to sponsor them, even when the kids are grown and the father comes up, the kids will still recognize you as their father

mariahAngel:
If I were the man, those children remain mine as long as they’re legally mine.
Now, that does not mean I’ll continue with the marriage. My capacity to forgive that level of betrayal has not been tested.

Janesouthall:


See ur mouth like If I were the man, those children remain mine as long as they’re legally mine.
There is nothing like having you own biological children... One day those pikin go look for their real father...

22marvelous:
Two weeks ago via a radio station I was listening to this evening, a man got to know that his twin sons that he loves so much and is ready to go extreme miles for,for the past 5 years,he has literally and practically been training another man's kids,he has left his home and has gone to his parents house,his parents ve told him to abandon the innocent kids,but he is devastated and emotionally drained and traumatized,school is about resuming, should he still go ahead paying for the school fees of another man's kids,he is planning for a divorce.
No insults pls,just ur suggestions pls

mariahAngel:


I simply cannot stop loving them because I found out they’re not biologically mine. If I can accept them as mine, then they’re mine. (It is up to me)
After all, there are couples who have their own biological children and still adopt.

Just think about those children in this situation(the post)...they’re the worst hit.
You might think that because they’re just children, it doesn’t affect them. It does a great deal.

Janesouthall:

Speaking from a woman's perspective...

Michelle55:

If she was truly remorseful like you've said, she would have confessed her sins immediately the infidelity happened or when she knew she was pregnant, I'm sure both of them would have reached an agreement on how to handle the situation. Why wait after 5years to break and shatter the man that way?

Repentance is when you wholly admit your wrongs immediately when you realise you might be hurting the other party involved, and not wait for too long to do that. Dude is already attached to the kids and it feels like his world is crumbling right before him with this confession. It's well!

LilMissFavvy:
He should forgive the wife if she is genuinely sorry and repented. The issue should be kept as top secret. He and wife can be splitting the children's bills, or if wife is financially buoyant enough, let her be paying the fees alone, while the man pays rents, other bills etc. Let him accept them, afterall people adopt kids.

Kirchoffs:
God punîsh you...if you are married am sure your kids don't belong to their father

Kirchoffs:
God punîsh you...if you are married am sure your kids don't belong to their father

Caramia2020:
This situation is not just paying fees n paying the other bills but a breach of contract. Someone said if u love ur wife forgive n keep it a secret, smile humans, what's secret there? as if d other man won't come for the children one day n what's the guarantee that the woman will not bring more strange children in future. To me, dat marriage is no more bcoz Nigeria men are not like Zimbabwe men dat will go n beg their wife after being caught with two men, their ego is highly important. Finally love is not enough in a marital relationship but trust highly important.

Michelle55:

Let's assume it's your brother in this situation, would you give him the same advice knowing that the wife lied to him from the onset? Do think about it before responding, let's try to give advice that we can also swallow if we find ourselves in the same situation.

That's paternity fraud, what would happen if the man didn't find out earlier? There's nothing wrong in adoption or training another's man child/children as long as he's doing so consciously and willingly with no iota of deception from the woman's side.

She broke that vow when she decided to open her legs for another man who isn't her husband and not just that, but also getting pregnant in the process. She should bear the brunt alone.