It must be observed, that there are spoken and unspoken words in our everyday communication with one another, aware of it or not. The unspoken, sometimes, come to be called body language, depending on the societal norms and often, of the educational or cultural background. The same is true, in a chaotic society, these basic stitches of communication are not often given the credence they deserved in any pronouncement.
At a school context, the winner stood up with an extraordinary ovation and bowed down to the huge audience that gathered for the occasion of the day.
The man beside one of the individual who was among the audience with his son bend a little just to whisper to his friend and said; " l wish l had a son that smart". The boy beside him fidgeting on what looks like a metal hair next to him looked up to his Dad with sad eyes.
On a similar occasion, an artist unveils one of his masterpieces, only to hear someone in the vicinity exclaim; "How ugly!".
At any give time, more often than not, we come to witness this similar scene occurs simply because some individual has not yet learned to make adequate use of the concept called " Tactfulness".lt will be observed that the concept of "Tact" can be found between two other concepts commonly applied by people in our every day dealing with one another, known as " Submissiveness" and " Aggressiveness".
It is often true that people tend to be too blurt in dealing with others and called it frankness, unaware of the hurt or discomfort they must have caused to other individuals.
Of cause, it could have been avoided where there is sanity and adequate psychological development of the ability to mentally reverse roles. In the scripture, in one of the verses, "do unto others as you would have them do to you", a sort of conscious awareness of putting oneself in the place of the others.
Although, we often come to explicate this as; it is due to the environmental pressure, which often disallowed the conscious awareness to take its rightful place.
However, it becomes often, difficult, if not impossible to contend with such situation, when it arise, but in reality, taken cognizant of the varying situation at play, self-education can minimize any extreme situation that allows for some level of sanity of communication.
To be Tactful is the act of politeness, firm, and yet sincere without any form of self-deceit, when confronting an unexpected situation, with a little dose of sensibility without hurting anyone along the line.
According to Emerson Waldo, " defect in manner is usually the defect of perception ", therefore, perception of other people's feelings is equally the very key to becoming more tactful on our part. Often, a bunch of individuals tends not to be aware of these facts, instead, they allow themselves to be drawn into a state of the borderline situation, which is a state between conscious and unconscious situation.
In this state, they are unaware of the very effect of their blunder, as they think at this point, nothing matters, as their instinct tends to dominate the act of rationality, and any temporary hurt amounts to nothing. The reality is that any such hurt can be devastating as to tends to ruins one's entire day.
Indeed, often any of such hurt can even result in some mental loss of self-worth, just like the one who gave his father a had sad look.
Although we can afford to give our opinion, makeup decisions, and take a stand, then look back at the way we actually act and communicated afterward, it becomes obvious, something was missing.
The same is true, that the moment we attribute our shortcoming or failure in securing anything to some situational influence, we may imagine exist, we no doubt, short the door against self-analysis and even fail to learn a valuable lesson of a lifetime.