My story began two months ago when i saw a job advert for an executive fashion consultant vacancy for proposed upscale boutique online and i applied for it. I was called for an interview and i was present. Bottomline after the interview i was picked by the owner as the successful candidate. Subsequently before the employer returned back to the United States of America, she allways interacted with me , called me and whenever there were errands to run, i did it. Least i forget, i have a degree in computer science. She promised me heaven and earth, she always pleaded with me to stay with her, that she promises to take care of me. I was not to communicate with anyone but her. She would get me this, she would get me that. Maybe i was stupid, but i believed in her and her dreams. From that minute onward i took her as a friend and second family.

Just a week after i got called for an interview with one of the banks in my state. I sat for the exams and passed. I was very confused because now i had to choose between two jobs. The bank job was three times the initial pay of the other.This is what i have prayed for and waited for all my life. For God's sake i had been without a job for close to two years. Ad when i though of my promise to stay with her, i acted against the wishes of family and friends and choosed her over the bank job. To me it was a matter of my loyalty to her and not the money. I just did not want to disappoint her. But i did send her an email to tell her about the bank job offer  got and that i was sticking with her instead because i believed in her.

As a down to earth person, i always gave her my candid opinions when ever she asked for it. Some of the advice i gave to her where
1. shortening her boutique name.
I suggested that the name of her boutique was too long and would be difficult for people to pronounce. For example it would be easier for people use the innitials since the name was a 6 worded french mixed wwith English sentence.I said adopting the initials would be better.
2. Since its going to be an international brand, getting a brand logo, well designed for her website would be good too. Well she came up with a rose as her logo.
3. More content for website because the homepage was devoid of anything but pictures. No intro about the company, nothing. Well maybe as a web designer, i just thought the site was too crappy for what she was proposing. I took the time not just to critic it, i designed one for her without charges. I have attached pics of her site and the one i designed for her below. The former hers, the latter mine.
4. Her Fan club on facebook increased from 12 members to 103
5. I went to more than four universities , just to market for her and her miss cosmopolitan scholarship competition on facebook.
6. suggested ways of getting more fans on facebook
7. Started adverts on forums, facebook for her shop
8. Purchased a blackberry like she requested for more marketing outreach
9. Gave me items to sell for her, which i did.
9. And a lot more i cant say here
Bear in mind that the shop has not been opened. I asked for complimentary cards and when the wait was too long i suggested making some for myself before she comes but she would not allow it. It was to enable me do more marketing  and a means of identification. There were no flyers or handbills whatsoever. And i was supposed to go get clients who would pay monies for goods they could not see? To a person they cant identify? I tried my best, i really did but would you take me seriously?

And after working for her for a month, running errands prior to the opening of her shop this june end or july, she sent me a mail that effective from immediately my job was terminated. I was shocked to the bones. I had believed in someone who did not believe in me. I had lost the job of a life time because of misplaced loyalty. I had been stupid. I cant even tell my family members because they would be so disappointed. I am 28 right now, with no job.

Now what was her excuse for sacking me? She said i was too competitive, she needed more of team spirit and togetherness. And i wondered how i had ever competed with her. My boss for that matter.

Secondly i was very active at first but i got to a peak and i fell below standards. And i wondered how. I had nothing to market with, no handbills, no flyers, no business cards, no goods, no shop, no advert on tv or radio. I did all my best.

Thirdly i comfortably market only to family members. Now that i dont understand I might not be a professional marketer or have a degree in marketing but i know marketing starts from home. If you cant convince your family and friends to patronize you, then how do you tell others?

Right now i am very confused I dont know where to start. I have had sleepless nights for more than a week and i am a shadow of myself. I am depressed and a recluse now. At 28 i have got no job. No connections whatsoever to get one now. I really want to work but there is none. Please Nairalanders tell me what to do.Where did i go wrong?

This is the one i designed as a sample

Get an ak 47 and blow off her brains!!!! Useless woman. My dear, God will provide another job. Just kp applying and praying. It is well.

Wicked woman! That's the disadvantage of some of these one man businesses.You could get the sack for stupid reasons.
You should have considered your career prospects with the bank because you will definitely rise after some years.

Thanks. I just feel so stupid. How could i have been so loyal to someone who does not even understand the concept of loyalty? I even got her my twin cousins as models for the opening day. After she told me i could no longer work with her, she sent them personal messages demanding for their cell phone numbers. I wondered how justified she was in using my cousins free of charge for her modelling when she said i couldnt represent her here. I have been all nice and polite. But sure i feel stupid and betrayed. My job at the bank wasnt even marketing, it was guaranteed. She was starting up, and we had been communicating well. She even told me i was the most intelligent female she had met. I just felt if i were to abandon her because of the higher pay of the bank job, it wont be fair. Even the week she sent me the mail that i could no longer work for her, she had brought me some bags for sales and even though i wasnt employed as a marketer i sold some of it.
Now she has put up another advert for an Executive Fashion Consultant online. Somehow, someday, i pray things work out fine for me

Am sure God saw your level of loyalty and He will surely reward you in due time. Just be hopeful

My dear, i dont even knw wat to say but take heart. You've been good and u hav shown that u can be an asset to any organization. Do not despair, ur opening will come. She was wicked and perhaps as they say, that job was not for you. So long as you are this proactive, a job will come. Your mistake was ignoring your bank job for this woman.You took a gamble, you lost, it doesnt mean you'l lose another time. I guess you stuck with her becos you have more passion for fashion n style than banking. Your time will come.

As I write,  I will also soon be in a similar situation. I am inbewteen jobs at the moment and i am about being recruited into an international organization with good prospects for career development. My direct Unit Head is a neigbor and former classmate so he has being giving me all the dubs. However, I have a principal in Abuja who has just been nominated as a Cabinet Minister. They are still undergoing screening and GEJ is yet to send their names to senate. He will be confirmed and sworn in though.

Now, am supposed to work with him as a special assistant. He hasnt given me approval in principle though, but thats because everything isnt settled yet and am not in Abuja at the moment. By upper week anyway, i shd know. So long as he says yes, am dropping this hard fought offer in lagos to move to abuja and become a ministerial aide. Its a risk but one am willing to take. He could be there 2years, 4yrears but within that time, i shd be able to get what i seek. I could very easily start with him, ignore this offer and after a time, he sidelines me and i turn to almost a normal civil servant, but its a risk am willing to take.
take heart.

I think you are already getting some encouragement here, my to be Minister's aid, if i were in your shoes, i will also go to Abuja and join them, make all you can within the time available and move on men, you never know the kind of connection you will meet over there.

All I can say is take heart.


It's a pity this has happened to you but I'm pretty sure you'll get something better soon.

I know of someone who experienced a similar situation.


Keep trusting God and keep applying and don't be weighed down completely by the loss.

Thanks y'all for your encouragement . Your comments have made me feel better because i was starting to loose confidence in myself and i just needed to know or find out if something i wasnt seeing was wrong with me.I have already started applying for other jobs. Hopefully my prayers would be answered soon.

Things will b fine 4u just keep holdiog on
But seriously, a bird at hand is always worth two in the bush.

She is not your God .Your God will see you through again.Be positive and leave her to her conscience.

@OP

The funny thing is that God has already credited your account.You will soon reap your rewards so try to forgive and move on.

Thanks

You said banking was your dream career but your story did not suggest that. On the contrary, it pointed to fashion and clothing being your dream career, which is the only way I can explain your choice of uncertainty over certainty, choice of vagaries of one-man- business with all its limitations over growth and exciting career in the corporate world. Loyalty, what loyalty? You only need to give her a notice as per your contract and follow your dream. People move jobs everyday and all employment contracts include such procedures. Your decision is made even more bizarre by the fact that the so called business has no structures! Or was your turned by the prospect of being sent to the US to purchase stock for the business? Did I hear someone say 'learning the hard way?' Life is about decisions. They make and mar you. Loyalty or lack of it does not necessarily define your character. What does rather is treachery. Once you feel the need to shift loyalty, inform all concerned. It keeps your integrity intact. Better decision and better luck next time!

Thanks for all your comments. @ fabianjoe this wasn't meant to be a sob story or a thread to gather sympathy. If you read the topic well, I was uncertain and wanted to know from experienced people on nairaland what exactly I had done wrong so as to correct it in future. If loyalty, hardwork, dedication or chipping in my ideas was going to be seen as overmuch, I wanted to know so as not to make the same mistake.
Again if you read through, I myself had realized what had made me opt for this job, I called it misplaced loyalty. I had been out of a job for a year and I had waited for this bank job even before going for NYSC.Now I can't explain the rational behind my decision to stick with this job because now it seems stupid. The way I saw it, the she interviewed me, saw what others had not seen in me for a while,out of everyone she picked me and I tot that had to count for something.she was just starting up,and she kept on telling me that if I were to stay with her, she would make sure everything is taken care of. You should even see the organizational chart she sent me,I was on top of the chart, plus I was going to be training subordinates.we had very good communication and I guess I tot that if I abandoned her now,when she had no one else it would be a bad start for her. It was a very tough decision for me, but I made it and I blame no one else for those decisions because I have learnt never to trust what ever a single business owner says.
And fabianjoe I resent the fact that you insinuated that I ignored the bank job because of promises of going abroad to purchase stuffs. I really do because its untrue. It never even occured to me. The only incentive there was that she was not going to be in the country and I was going to be managing her business here and giving her tabs.

I seem to have upset you and I honestly feel very awful as you sound reasonable. As bad decisions go, I have had a few myself, the worst of which, I reckon is leaving my decent job in Abuja and turning down two other better offers to travel to the UK for an expensive Masters degree, frittering away all I had worked for. Masters degree completed, no job in the UK, no job in Nigeria, where do I go from here? Lessons learnt!

@JSL. Send me ur CV at tinkinofyou@hotmail.com. I'll send your CV as I send mine.

@JSL, there was no need for all the details as it makes for easy identification. What if others that know you and may have wanted to help now see your action as immature or sour grapes? The milk has since spilt but life goes on. If you think you've had it bad, think again. Some have been looking for jobs for ages, some lost their jobs after going on leave for medical reasons, some are facing days of hunger, some are facing amputations etc. What if something unpalatable happened to you if you had taken the bank job offer? What if your acceptance of the fashion job was your best decision ever (not according to reasoning of the flesh)? Give thanks to your MAKER rather than lament on Nairaland or to fellow men.

i feel sorry for you, please accept my sincere condolences and cheer up; but just wanted to add that this is only one side of the story. for someone to sack you after all this she must have been really mad about some of your actions/inactions. Maybe you need to fill us in on her point of view so we can give you well rounded advice and not just sorry, eyah etc.

@amor4ace I did not come to lament on Nairaland so pls stop with the judgemental attitude.If you have ever been in this kind of a situation, you would know how it feels. I was confused and needed to know what was wrong with me. You get to a stage where you begin to doubt if you really have anything good in you. That was were I was when I wrote this. I get worried a lot and it was already giving me sleepless nights. And I just had to find out if the fault was mine for changes. You say I am childish by bringing this up here and that the details where too much. Yeah I did realize about the details along the way after I uploaded screenshots.but how that makes me childish I still don't get. I realize its quite easy for you to sit in front of your computer and judge me, but flaws and all, I am me and responsible for my actions. At a stage I wished this thread would just die off because it has served its purpose of letting me know where I got it wrong. But it just won't.

Sorry, wat's dat ur name xcept jld?, Men, as a learned person am really disappointed in you, i must confess! Puting all your trust on a stranger, "STRANGER FOR THAT MATTER." i can't even trust my extended families, talkless of a stranger. Anyway if one door closes, thousand will surely open. I really feel your pains. Keep on applying 4 jobs online, i know God will neva let you down. Aside searching 4 jobs call me 08186423545 to link you up wit online investment. How you can use 1$ to make money online. Really care to lecture on how u can invest. Still continuing applying. The Lord is ur strength

I did not judge, neither did I call you childish. Besides, your friend will not seek to tell you what you want to hear but tell you as it is out of love. Just move on and in peace too and you'll get through without pain.

@JSL: The more this thread stretches, the more confused I get about what actaully you want from Nairalanders. You admitted that you made a wrong decision and that your interpretation of loyalty is flawed. But those that try to practical and highlight those are always replied with harshness and hostilty by you. You seem to be more comfortable with those that would rather deflect the blame away from you and tell you it is an act of God with prayers for bigger things in the future to match. I have no problem with that but what it suggests to me is that you are not seeking practical advice but a shoulder to cry on, despite your protestations against earlier insinuations. My advice still goes this way: You definitely bungled this one. Take stock and see what you need to change from henceforth to avoid this in the future.

I'm truly sorry about what happened to you but you just have to dust it off and move on with your life. Please send me your number on beatriceoffor@yahoo.com let me teach you how to achieve financial independence.

JSL,

The things that are wrong here are your inexperience and your tear-jerking attitude towards your employer.

If your employer fires you a few weeks after hiring you, is it it behaving unethically? No. It's a business decision. Now, that's why you should treat your career as a business, and always make choices that makes the most fiscal and career growth sense for you as an individual.

NB: A person's integrity is revealed when we see how they handle the outcome of a situation - not in the decision they make.

Thanks everyone. All advice have been taken in.

thread locked by OP(Original Poster)'s request.