Have you "liked"
Goodluck Jonathan
today?
By Tolu Ogunlesi
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Imagine Facebook existed during
the reign of Sani Abacha. Instead
of inviting traditional rulers to
the screening of the ‘Diya Coup'
videos he'd simply have tagged
them on Facebook; if, that is, he
refrained - against the advice of
persons like Al-Mustapha - from
totally banning the social
networking site in Nigeria.
Sadly we will never know. Abacha
did not wait to see the Internet
boom. Obasanjo and Yar'Adua
who on the other hand saw it
did not care much for it; they
were our own George W. Bush.
Goodluck Jonathan is therefore a
breath of fresh air.
Not only is he the first Nigerian
president from a minority ethnic
group, he will also go down in
history as the first Nigerian
leader to embrace social
networking as a tool of
governance. If Obasanjo was our
Television President (recall the
Presidential media chats, and the
nationwide broadcast
announcing that the Senate
President and Education Minister
were thieves), Jonathan is our
Facebook President.
As I write this he is the most
popular Nigerian on Facebook.
Only two weeks after joining he
has amassed more than 120,000
followers. Apart from a glitch
early on, that saw the
defacement by some e-
miscreants of the president's
photo pages (images of an
unknown nude man suddenly
appeared in the hallowed
presidential arena); Mr.
Jonathan has been having a
blast. Thursday morning he had
about 116,000 "likers". Twenty-
four hours later the number had
risen to more than 121,000.
A cartoon by our own Zapiro, the
inimitable Asukwo E.B., has Mr.
Jonathan in bed, eyes glued to
his laptop, while he tells a sleepy
dame that he'll remain awake for
a bit longer; he has to check his
Facebook page. If I had any
drawing talent I'd instantly
create my own cartoon: Aunty
Dame wagging her finger
furiously at the President,
muttering: "Today you are going
to tell me who the First Lady is;
me or that Lap-top, "
Mr. Jonathan's Facebook page
sure is the place to be these days.
Next time you wonder why no
one is commenting on your
update or note, or poking you;
why the alleys of Facebook seem
deserted, wonder not far: all are
smitten and have succumbed to
the allure of e-AsoRock. Every
presidential update is
commented upon and "liked" by
not less than 2,000 people.
Compare that with the half dozen
comments that most of us would
be grateful for.
If half as many people liked
Obasanjo we'd be talking about
a fourth term for the old man
today. (It's a good thing
Obasanjo wasn't on Facebook as
president; imagine this
appearing in newsfeeds all over
Facebook, while both men were
still in office: "Obasanjo is no
longer listed as being in a
(political) relationship with
Atiku."
The multitude of fawning
comments on the page say a lot
about the Nigerian psyche. In a
land under the siege of Big Men,
we are suckers for accessibility
and a semblance of humility.
Murtala Muhammed stands out in
the annals of Nigerian history for
many reasons, one of which is
that he shunned the trappings of
power expected of his position -
long, sirened convoys with
animals-in-uniform hanging from
every corner.
Recall also how Governor Ayodele
Fayose became a folk hero of
sorts in Ekiti for his penchant for
eating in roadside bukas and
stopping to buy suya and
roasted corn in public. Governor
Fashola stands out in Lagos for
the unobtrusiveness of his
convoy - flashing siren lights
without the sound.
And recently I saw former Cross
River State governor Donald Duke
walk into the Genesis Deluxe
Cinemas in Lekki, with his wife
and daughters - if you didn't
know him you wouldn't have
guessed this was an ex-governor
and a current presidential
candidate. As they joined the
queue to buy popcorn, I almost
simultaneously joined the Donald
Duke fan queue (were it not for
the cynicism I have learned to
wear as a protective mask).
Moral of the stories above:
Nigerians, citizens of a land
perpetually starved of heroes and
(true) humility, are drawn in a
mysterious way to Big Men who
strive to not act like Big Men.
The president must have
discovered that Facebook is one
cheap and easy means to be a
Big Man who does not appear to
be a Big Man.
But watch out Mr. President. Your
current monopoly of Facebook
might not last very long. One
Very-Important-Personality has
also recently discovered
Facebook. Max Gbanite, a diehard
IBB supporter (the man never
tires of writing long rambling
pro-Babangida essays on the
Internet) told a Nigerian
newspaper last week:
"Babangida enjoys reading
Facebook and sends messages
under a different name;
Babangida is a gigabyte thinking
man, he is not operating on the
outdated DOS (Disk Operating
System) level."
There it is: Maradona is now a
fan of Facebook! Indeed the
battle ahead is a "Gigabyte" one,
and Nigeria's next president just
might be decided on Facebook!
But jokes apart, two questions
for you, dear reader: one, what
will you do when that inevitable
friend request from IBB shows
up?
Two, have you "liked" Goodluck
Jonathan today?

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lmao,very funny article.

Too long and clueless