ruthfully, it’s just as “normal” to not want sex every minute of every day as it is to desire it constantly. While hormonal fluctuations, the aging process, and the quality of one’s partnered sex life are often to blame, there are plenty of other, less documented reasons that can cause a downfall in you or a partner’s arousal.

It’s easy to push blame on a partner or yourself, or start digging up relational problems when there’s a rejection to initiating sex. Oftentimes, though, the reasons are more simple and much less serious than you think.

Before you blow up an honest, gentle rejection into an argument, consider these 5 totally normal, not-at-all-unusual reasons that you or your partner aren’t in the mood at the moment.

REASON #1: YOU’VE JUST EATEN A BIG MEAL

Honestly, who ever decided that eating just prior to an evening specifically planned for sex was a good idea?

Going out for dinner is still one of the most popular ways to prep yourself for romance and flirtation, whether you’re married or on a first date. When you think about it, however, eating a hearty restaurant meal doesn’t exactly make for comfortable, pleasurable sex.

REASON #2: YOU’VE JUST EXPERIENCED STRESS, TRAUMA OR ANXIETY