₦airaland Forum

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You expect me to read all this
Hell no bro i can't
This is an Epistle
The next person to comment should summarise it for us

OscarJaden:
You expect me to read all this
Hell no bro i can't
This is an Epistle
The next person to comment should summarise it for us

Couldn't read it too... So long... My brain can't handle this!

Next person should summarise

Hope he won't beat you up if you fight him?
Thank God for my parents, them no too get but they trained us well

Moonshine101:
Hello Everyone!

I have a family issue but I don't have someone to speak to about it, so I'm very grateful for your inputs on this matter.

SOME BACKSTORY (You can skip this if you want):
I'm the youngest of my two siblings (26M). I have a sister and a brother. My sister's kinda okay. My brother (35) is a selfish, toxic and entitled person. He dropped out from the university, doesn't have a job and he steals from my parents like my dad's watches or property or my mum's jewellery and then sells them to buy weed or something.

One time he sold my mum's car and after some police and legal issue that basically went nowhere, she basically had to steal it back (The guy who bought it, passed away a little while after, so I guess that case is closed..), he once took my phone while I was sleeping because I refused to give him a different phone I had, that belongs to me after selling his own phone or something. It's like he acts solely on impulse. My dad (who's in his 70s now) is almost always on security alert when my brother is around. As for my mom, she just straight up enables him and bails him out of trouble every time, saying things like "He's your brother" or "God will change him" when I talk to her about it. My brother and I got into a fight, like a year before I left for university, because he wanted to look around my room to see if I had his usb cable despite me telling him I don't have it nor have I seen it. That was the last time I willingly spoke to him.

My family moved into a new house and I finally left for school (my brother stayed in the old house and my sister moved in with her husband after marriage, so it was just him over there). During my 3rd year, I called my dad, asking him for some money because I was broke, and during the phone call, my dad tells me that he's at the hospital cuz my brother and some girl just had a kid. okay.. I came back for holidays and found out that his baby mama (who's also toxic and insults people alot) and kid, my nephew, are staying with us, with my parents providing for them while my brother stays in the older house, renting it out to people (who messed up the house and compound to the point it just became a disgusting place to live in) obviously without permission from my parents (who don't even own that house, it belongs to my uncle). By the time I graduated and came back home, he was now living with us in the new house because free food and no bills, I guess.

I haven't gotten a job yet so I'm stuck here.

Recently, he's been staying away from me because I don't talk to him or even look at him.

BACK TO THE TOPIC:
Around a year ago, I had a serious wakeup call and decided that, if I was going to go forward in life I would have to better myself so I began a journey of meditation and self-improvement, and I think I've made some good progress. Now the issue is my brother---earlier today, I saw him scouting our house (after my parents went out) and I could instantly tell he was up to no good. I was cooking when I began to hear some noise from upstairs like he was hacking at something. He came downstairs and readied his car while my cousin who stays with us (19) carried the AC unit my brother was planning to sell.
Usually I'll just mind my business and avoid him because he's an adult-child (narcissist) and I think he'll just put his vindictive sights on me if I interfere, but this time I don't know what came over me..

I called my cousin and demanded where he was taking that AC to. I then asked my brother (first time in years I've spoken to him) why he was taking it, he just gave one nonsense flimsy excuse then I told my cousin to return it. When he tried to explain whatever, I didn't acknowledge his presence, I just ignored him and ate my food. He just stood there staring at me for like 3 minutes before he left while murmuring something.

The main reason I've been avoiding him for long is because he's toxic and I decided that family or not, toxicity is still toxicity. He's very exploitative and once he familiarises with someone it's like an opening to trample the person's boundaries. I think I confronted him today because the more you ignore bad/evil the stronger it becomes and eventually it will come for you except now it'll be stronger from all the experience.

The issue is, I don't want to relapse into my old life of toxicity by further engaging him if he decides to steal from me on get physical because he's the kind of person that only listens to actions, not words.
Please, what do you think I do?

E be like I will continue reading tomorrow, I'm so tayyaaaaddddddd

Well you are pretty Judgemental here, Your brother might look like the black sheep to you, but he is just going through his own frustration..... Sadly you are not in talking terms so I can't give you any advice.... but I have seen bad boys turn good so I have learnt not to judge people when they are going through a phase ..better be on talking terms with your brother.

Rexymania:
Hope he won't beat you up if you fight him?
Thank God for my parents, them no too get but they trained us well

Nope, we're the same size. Be grateful for the family you have.

So you are trying to tell us that you're back from school that's why you are blowing all this grammar, please next person to tell us because even me too, I don't understand

jackcanfield:
Well you are pretty Judgemental here, Your brother might look like the black sheep to you, but he is just going through his own frustration..... Sadly you are not in talking terms so I can't give you any advice.... but I have seen bad boys turn good so I have learnt not to judge people when they are going through a phase ..better be on talking terms with your brother.

I don't think people like his brother can change. He's already 35 and has a kid. He can't change again. The best thing is for the OP to avoid him so as not to cause issues.
A narcissist would always be a narcissist.

Any summariser on ground abeg

Not the best advice but Ur brother is it bro.

Now who does he listen to?
Who does he love?
Who does he fear?

Any of this persons will have a good impact in his life towards Ur family
As for you avoiding him I can't say
If you can't take up then best is to avoid him but protect your family From him at all cost

Fiction.

Bros u no get conscience ooh.....
see the kind long family issue u expect person to read by dis time..
any sha,i will continue reading 4rm 2moro,i knw were i stop.....

Moonshine101:
Hello Everyone!

I have a family issue but I don't have someone to speak to about it, so I'm very grateful for your inputs on this matter.

SOME BACKSTORY (You can skip this if you want):
I'm the youngest of my two siblings (26M). I have a sister and a brother. My sister's kinda okay. My brother (35) is a selfish, toxic and entitled person. He dropped out from the university, doesn't have a job and he steals from my parents like my dad's watches or property or my mum's jewellery and then sells them to buy weed or something.

One time he sold my mum's car and after some police and legal issue that basically went nowhere, she basically had to steal it back (The guy who bought it, passed away a little while after, so I guess that case is closed..), he once took my phone while I was sleeping because I refused to give him a different phone I had, that belongs to me after selling his own phone or something. It's like he acts solely on impulse. My dad (who's in his 70s now) is almost always on security alert when my brother is around. As for my mom, she just straight up enables him and bails him out of trouble every time, saying things like "He's your brother" or "God will change him" when I talk to her about it. My brother and I got into a fight, like a year before I left for university, because he wanted to look around my room to see if I had his usb cable despite me telling him I don't have it nor have I seen it. That was the last time I willingly spoke to him.

My family moved into a new house and I finally left for school (my brother stayed in the old house and my sister moved in with her husband after marriage, so it was just him over there). During my 3rd year, I called my dad, asking him for some money because I was broke, and during the phone call, my dad tells me that he's at the hospital cuz my brother and some girl just had a kid. okay.. I came back for holidays and found out that his baby mama (who's also toxic and insults people alot) and kid, my nephew, are staying with us, with my parents providing for them while my brother stays in the older house, renting it out to people (who messed up the house and compound to the point it just became a disgusting place to live in) obviously without permission from my parents (who don't even own that house, it belongs to my uncle). By the time I graduated and came back home, he was now living with us in the new house because free food and no bills, I guess.

I haven't gotten a job yet so I'm stuck here.

Recently, he's been staying away from me because I don't talk to him or even look at him.

BACK TO THE TOPIC:
Around a year ago, I had a serious wakeup call and decided that, if I was going to go forward in life I would have to better myself so I began a journey of meditation and self-improvement, and I think I've made some good progress. Now the issue is my brother---earlier today, I saw him scouting our house (after my parents went out) and I could instantly tell he was up to no good. I was cooking when I began to hear some noise from upstairs like he was hacking at something. He came downstairs and readied his car while my cousin who stays with us (19) carried the AC unit my brother was planning to sell.
Usually I'll just mind my business and avoid him because he's an adult-child (narcissist) and I think he'll just put his vindictive sights on me if I interfere, but this time I don't know what came over me..

I called my cousin and demanded where he was taking that AC to. I then asked my brother (first time in years I've spoken to him) why he was taking it, he just gave one nonsense flimsy excuse then I told my cousin to return it. When he tried to explain whatever, I didn't acknowledge his presence, I just ignored him and ate my food. He just stood there staring at me for like 3 minutes before he left while murmuring something.

The main reason I've been avoiding him for long is because he's toxic and I decided that family or not, toxicity is still toxicity. He's very exploitative and once he familiarises with someone it's like an opening to trample the person's boundaries. I think I confronted him today because the more you ignore bad/evil the stronger it becomes and eventually it will come for you except now it'll be stronger from all the experience.

The issue is, I don't want to relapse into my old life of toxicity by further engaging him if he decides to steal from me on get physical because he's the kind of person that only listens to actions, not words.
Please, what do you think I do?

Nice movie

Go and get a job and leave that house. This is one of the reason why I don't like going home after NYSC, privacy and freedom is all that matters.

Demigod22:
Go and get a job and leave that house. This is one of the reason why I don't like going home after NYSC, privacy and freedom is all that matters.

I'm working on that.