Growing up, I tried to concentrate in school even while at the university, to avoid distractions.

I had just few girls around.

I have since the past 3 years--- after relative success in my field--- had few flings, wooed and slept with a few girls too from all tribes; had like 3 living with me for weeks at some point.

Now in early 30s I feel like I should seek something serious.
I find myself picking phone numbers from girls but then I come home, initiate a chat introducing myself but I have no zeal to take it further than that.

I just get tired of the whole thing.

Again, some of them seem uninterested.

You notice this lack of interest from the way they respond with monosyllables, respond after several hours or days or even abandoning the chats outright.


This is more pronounced if you come off too as gentle, without bragging, showing off etc.

I have no difficulty giving girls things occasionally but I hate to feel used or feel a woman is interested in only what she can gain in the short term- immediate gratification.


Going on dates would have been a good option as many girls would hardly reject free food, drinks etc but I don't have the time or energy hence deem it otiose, that's beyond the financial implications as many of the girls are coming to the dates to access you, not necessarily to know you.

And I hate showing off.


How do you guys navigate around this conundrum please especially if you are looking for something serious and not just sex?