SHOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE THIS

INTRO

Lavender J. Amherst, the beautiful and only daughter of her father, though illegitimate. Bore by her father’s mistress who later died, she was loathed by her father’s wife, snobbed by her siblings and looked upon as a disappointment to her father. Desperate to prove to her family she can make them happy and proud, she tried everything she could to make things better but failed.

Everything however became better as she is suddenly the star of the family when an admire business tycoon take interest in her. Living in love and admiration from both her family, the public and her fiance, Rominic B. Verlice, she is blind to see the handwriting on the wall until reality hits her hard. She lost everything as quick as she gained it when the truth comes out, but life gives her comfort in the form of five.

She runs away; away from her past, away from her father who disowned her, away from the pain and agony and live to take care of the blessings she discovered she had. But when everything starts falling apart again, she is once again face with her ex, the love of her life, father of her children but enemy.

But hatred can never be stronger than love.

?‍? Prologue ?‍?

The rain poured down on me as I walked down the lonely street. It was a storm outside with lightning and thunder blasting in the sky. The lightning struck the poles and the ground sometimes, but it didn’t bother me. I felt numb and cold. Nothing, no pain, no happiness, no emotions at all.

I was empty.

I had nothing left, no one left. One minute I was happy, living in the spotlight, celebrating and swimming in love, and the next, I was homeless without a penny to my name. Alone I wander the streets like a hobo, face covered to hide the shame that is me. I caused it, I caused everything. I should have just mind my business and stay on my own, I should have went the other way that night. I thought it was fate, I thought it was the heavens smiling down at me and leading me to take the wrong path so I could meet him, but it wasn’t. He planned it all.

I still remember that night, the night my car broke down in the middle of a quiet road, how he drove past and helped me. Like that, I thought that it was destiny, but boy was I wrong.

“I don’t care about that bitch, Peyton, I have proven that to you times without number, why do you keep doubting my love for you!” His voice echoed in my head. The words that made me halt on my joyful sway to his office; the furious words that made me froze at the door.

“Then why are you holding back! You already used her to access her father’s wealth, the papers are all yours, what’s holding you back! I thought you promised to give me the papers to her mother’s factory, what are you still waiting for! You already have all the documents!” My heart stopped when I heard that. I didn’t remember giving him my father’s documents, just my mother’s factory’s and telling him where my father kept his.

The world crashed on me that moment and I remain frozen at the door, listening to the love of my life speaking about how much he hated me and why he was hesitating. His reason didn’t make any sense, but yet it was true and I was a fool. Peyton, the woman he introduce to me as his best friend was his lover, the real woman he loved. And of course, I stood there in shock until she came out and found me there, still in shock. But it didn’t matter, no more lying, no more pretending, they showed me their true colors.

I lost everything, my family lost everything. My stepmother died of heart attack and the shock killed one of my half-brother. Disowned, nothing left than to wander, to trek all the way to the city I buried my mother, to die with her.

The storm had nothing on me, hunger shook me not, I didn’t rest or sleep, just kept walking. I shut the pain out, shut down everything than the memories replaying in my head over and over again to fuel my decision to die. There was nothing left for me to do than to leave.

Bright light shone on me, but it didn’t stop me from walking like the miserable person I was. My vision was blurry, my body weak and failing me, but I kept walking, I went on. I felt nausea all of a sudden, it hit me hard as fast and hard as a menstrual cramp. I double over, bending down to my knees and holding my stomach. My breathing came out in wheeze, short breath that almost felt like my lungs were block.

A loud car honking filled my ears and mind as my thoughts completely zero in on nothing. A loud bell rang in my head, hitting my skull in a way that made my brain throb. Emotional pain, I numb myself to it, but not to physical one. The pain ended as quick as it came because blackness was the only thing I saw and dwelled in for the next couple of hours.

~~~~

I stared at the result in my shaking hands, my heart hammering against my chest. Beads of sweat surrounded my forehead and down to my neck and chest. Stomach seem like it was throbbing too. Tears flowed down my cheeks and fell on the test result. Someone saved me, someone picked me up from the corner of the road and took me to the hospital.

Pregnant, I was pregnant.

I could abort it, I shouldn’t carry the children of the man that ruined my life, but it wasn’t their fault. It was mine, I let myself get pregnant, I wanted the baby because I thought he would be there for me. It should have been like that; him and me together, but it was not.

I would take my life the way I see it.

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