E fit be like the guy nor even forgive u fully self, someone that Loved u, helped you and lifted you up with love, care and everything. You still cheated on him and later married him. He dey use your past to judge you now, he dey vex say u cheated before una marry, my dear not all guys forgives ladies when cheat on them, even if they later marry u. Call am, tell am your mind and ask him why he dey do all those things when he dey do to you, then you will see say he go remind u say u cheat on am and he still dey vex. Now he dey cheat,u dey vex

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

You gotta do what you gotta do. My only concern for you is this UK study route, you know it is 50/50? I wouldn't want you to flush your last naira down the drain in case it doesn't click

seriously, run for ur life, dont listen to any body advice, like patinace or something like that. his is idiot and ungrateful

TOPCRUISE:
Shey Plumber get levels ni. What is the meaning of level 3 plumber

He was employed by the government at level 3 government worker as plumber

VeeVeeMyLuv:

She is also abusing the husband as well

You may be correct.
That was why I said earlier that the hubby's side of the story is also needed for a balanced and unbiased judgement.

He doesn't deserve you if truly you are saying the truth

bestman09:

I hate any form of abuse, both physical and emotional in marriages. You have a thousand reasons to divorce him but one reason to rebuild the marriage. There are 3 sides to a story, (1) your side of the story (2) your husband's side of the story and (3) the truth about everything. Have you asked yourself about what would have happened if he didn't sponsor you in school at his own expense?

I have a blood sister that the husband sponsored to the UK about 14 years ago and sent her to nursing school. She became a citizen, rich while the man was deported about 5 years ago because of Visa issues. Now she divorced the man over some flimsy excuse 2 years ago despite the 3 children they have.

Some women with power and wealth tends to take their men for granted

Which expense? It is obvious that the man is just scared of going to school for whatever reason. Opportunities came but he still didn't want to go. Probably he didn't want to waste his money .

TOPCRUISE:
Shey Plumber get levels ni. What is the meaning of level 3 plumber

For civil service now .

Regex:


UK is not for play. I know someone whose husband refused to join them in UK as she gave birth in UK. The child birth and plus school fees hustle delayed her and she couldn't make it to pay her fees. Her visa expired and she came back to Nigeria.

Abeg leave the OP let her go. She is here running mouth. I want her to learn her lesson the hard way

My daughter, so much has been said. Process the pieces of advice with utmost care. What you propose to do is a MAJOR LIFE MOVE. Don't rush into it out of emotional pressure at all. Like someone said, it's 50/50. If it backfires, we will not be there at all and believe me, na there the real emotional pressure go begin.

Calm down. Think am well well based on true facts on ground, some of which you may not have told us here. Is oga truly altogether bad like this? Are there things you're doing too? Is there any possibility of him accepting to go with you to see a counselor? If the answers to these questions are yes, no and no respectively, you truly need to leave. The next thought will be how to leave without any serious future problems. If the answers are different, your marriage shouldn't end yet. Talk to an elderly woman you trust, who's still married herself.

So, if it turns out you must still leave, don't do it secretly. Remember you both are traditionalists; what if he harms you spiritually (and he's very likely to when frustrated)? Tell your parents everything and try to get them to be on your side. They will take it up and return the bride price. You didn't have a court or church wedding so I don't think divorce in court will be necessary.

Most men who are much older than their wives and who TRAINED THEIR WIVES IN SCHOOL take such wives as their babies. Something serious must have set him off, like infidelity. Think this thing well oh. No sell anything yet oh hanty. Na small wrong move de make person crash from grace to grass. Try resolving the issue if possible, rather than running off. I wish you both can give your lives to Jesus Christ and come under the mentorship of a genuine, mature pastor. You will see enjoyment in that marriage that you have written off.

Udo!

See the husband initial post on this issue

https://www.nairaland.com/7462717/cheating-wife

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

Coming to uk through student route is good, but the truth is You need to be able to afford the complete school fees, if not You will need a dependant to work on full-time, in order to be able to afford the pending school fees payment. The 20hrs per week work will only sustain u in paying rent, feeding and little savings.

Hedgefunds:




She should move on without you listening to the husband side of the story.

You said nothing abt her cheating?

You show no consirn abt the man who paused his life and sacrifice everything to see her succeed and called such man a man-child?

You don't even care if the lady has exaggerated her story ,

Also advicing her to get a death certificate for someone who is alive . ALL YOU LISTED ABOVE WILL BE DONE TO YOU.

Are you the man in question

Do exactly what you have outlined. No apologies at all. I know you are a good person from your write up but pls do exactly what you have planned without any guilt, but please be careful with these moves now as your life might be in danger in his hands.

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

so disturbing us about age, it has nothing to do Abt age

Peaceful singleness is better than abusive marriage.

I made promised never to hurt any lady that I will marry to because of the love I have for my sweet mother through Christ our Lord, Amen.
On behalf of good single youths on earth, I am so sorry for the painful union you're in. I pray for your freedom & happiness.

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.





I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

Based on the story, both of you made the uncomfortable bed you are presently lying on and you are horrible, very horrible for trying to steal his kids and run away to the UK.