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What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You - Religion - Nairaland

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What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by raphretle: 10:36pm On May 20, 2023
Have heard alot of unimaginable prophecies, decrees and revelations by some fake MOGs.
Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by woginid967: 10:51pm On May 20, 2023
raphretle:
Have heard alot of unimaginable prophecies, decrees and revelations by some fake MOGs.

That the woman i am currently with was my wife. Not knowing that I was banging his own wife 🤣😂
The wife comes to beg money from me from time to time, since she sees me as a calm young man who is successful. One day she shamefully told me her story, and while petting her i decided to go out get a fuel because my fone was down and i needed to transfer 124k to her for some bills that her fake prophet could not pay. I called it a seed. So i told her to feel free and take anything from the fridge... She ended up warming my indomie, unknown to her the indomie has weed and some enhancers in it. By the time i got back mummy was masturbating with my remote and fully naked. I tried to calm her down then she slept for 5 hours. She woke up 2 am.... I woke up to her cries... Saying she is sorry and didnt know what came over her. I forgot i was on boxers so she sighted my erection and held it... Told me she has not had sex in years.
I decided to help and she squirted and became unleashed. It was a Friday into Saturday, the fake prophet at his girlfriends place in another state, she returned the next morning and on sunday, she preached. The husband got back, held a program and i visited and he gave me the fake prophecy. I laughed he laughed and called his wife to tell her what js told me... I sowed 50k seed to the man and his eyes opened again to say the Lady loves me and i shouldn't let her go. Not knowing she is the mummy G.O standing by him.
Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by Jones4190(m): 6:57am On May 21, 2023
one fake prophet ask me to be bathing with salt, I let the salt in his office
Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by MuMuOnBail: 7:24am On May 21, 2023
na wa ooo


I was invited to a service by one of my side chicks here in Abj last year, who is hoping and fooling herself that I will marry her one day back then.

During prayers and prophesies the man of whatever or na pastor said the enemies from my community are holding my destiny not to marry (lols. my lovely wife and two kids are based in Sweden).

That they have tied me down, na so Side chick just de jump, the shout amen, de speak in tongues the cry. Inside my adulterous mind na so I just the laugh.
As she the jump na so her big nyash de shake, I de imagine the d*ggystyle we go still knack after service (Which we did!).

Pastor pray for me say make I bring three small stones, sea salt and 100K seed offering make he pray for me say my marital way go open.

Babe disturb me for more than 4 month to go see pastor. I knack her like roughly 10times before I ghost she and her fake pastor.

I no get village people, na me myself be the village people chairman.

3 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by Plasmolysis78(m): 8:05am On May 21, 2023
woginid967:


That the woman i am currently with was my wife. Not knowing that I was banging his own wife 🤣😂
The wife comes to beg money from me from time to time, since she sees me as a calm young man who is successful. One day she shamefully told me her story, and while petting her i decided to go out get a fuel because my fone was down and i needed to transfer 124k to her for some bills that her fake prophet could not pay. I called it a seed. So i told her to feel free and take anything from the fridge... She ended up warming my indomie, unknown to her the indomie has weed and some enhancers in it. By the time i got back mummy was masturbating with my remote and fully naked. I tried to calm her down then she slept for 5 hours. She woke up 2 am.... I woke up to her cries... Saying she is sorry and didnt know what came over her. I forgot i was on boxers so she sighted my erection and held it... Told me she has not had sex in years.
I decided to help and she squirted and became unleashed. It was a Friday into Saturday, the fake prophet at his girlfriends place in another state, she returned the next morning and on sunday, she preached. The husband got back, held a program and i visited and he gave me the fake prophecy. I laughed he laughed and called his wife to tell her what js told me... I sowed 50k seed to the man and his eyes opened again to say the Lady loves me and i shouldn't let her go. Not knowing she is the mummy G.O standing by him.

Figment of your imagination

2 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by Plasmolysis78(m): 8:07am On May 21, 2023
MuMuOnBail:
na wa ooo


I was invited to a service by one of my side chicks here in Abj last year, who is hoping and fooling herself that I will marry her one day back then.

During prayers and prophesies the man of whatever or na pastor said the enemies from my community are holding my destiny not to marry (lols. my lovely wife and two kids are based in Sweden).

That they have tied me down, na so Side chick just de jump, the shout amen, de speak in tongues the cry. Inside my adulterous mind na so I just the laugh.
As she the jump na so her big nyash de shake, I de imagine the d*ggystyle we go still knack after service (Which we did!).

Pastor pray for me say make I bring three small stones, sea salt and 100K seed offering make he pray for me say my marital way go open.

Babe disturb me for more than 4 month to go see pastor. I knack her like roughly 10times before I ghost she and her fake pastor.

I no get village people, na me myself be the village people chairman.


If you don't run from side chicks, you will end up as meat in their pots of soup soon. Be playing

1 Like

Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by hopefulLandlord: 8:17am On May 21, 2023
All are fake so they all say funny things ALL the time

1 Like

Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by raphretle: 10:37am On May 21, 2023
Things dey happen
Re: What's The Funniest Thing A Fake Pastor Told You by raphretle: 3:56pm On May 21, 2023
hopefulLandlord:
All are fake so they all say funny things ALL the time
Not true sha

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